


Orbital Mechanics

by SerahSerah



Category: Homestuck
Genre: AU after GAME OVER, Alcoholism, All Kinds of Love, But somehow happy nonetheless, Eating Disorders, F/F, F/M, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mental Illness, Post-Sburb/Sgrub, Really not that shippy, Reconciliation, building a new life from ruins, trauma/abuse aftermath
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-05
Updated: 2015-05-21
Packaged: 2018-02-28 07:08:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 32
Words: 51,151
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2723291
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SerahSerah/pseuds/SerahSerah
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The world was burning. Either that, or it was slowly being consumed by nothing. The memories are fuzzy. But still they remember a door opening and fleeing through it. Or maybe they just dreamed that bit. But here they are now, in a place just enough like home that it nose-dives straight into the uncanny valley when nice things start happening.</p><p>And at the same time, two civilisations make an astonishing discovery. They actually share their orbit around the sun with a second planet. And if that wasn’t impossible enough, it shows alarming signs of being populated by another (arguably) intelligent species.</p><p>The gods must be crazy.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ==> Karkat: Place that mysterious clicking noise

It took a lot longer than Karkat would later consider defensible, but there were a few circumstances that could almost excuse the fact that he failed to immediately place that mysterious clicking noise. 

For one, he had just woken up. He found himself lying on short grass, facing up to a starlit sky. For a while, as his subconscious tried to work out what was hearing, he just stared at the stars. It felt like forever ago that he had last seen them, but something about them was wrong. He had never been much of a stargazer, but he did remember some of the more obvious constellations, which were nowhere to be seen. There were some brighter stars, and some could possibly be patterns with some imagination, but all in all it was just sparkling blackness, the only remarkable feature being a dim white band stretching through his entire field of vision. 

The next order of business for his conscious mind was trying to work out how he got here. The last thing he distinctly remembered was being bored. So bored… no, that wasn’t it. That was a long time ago, he hadn’t been bored in a long time. Hadn’t he died? Yes, there had been some dying going on, more than once in fact, but he just couldn’t quite recall. His conscious mind really wasn’t doing much of a job with this whole ‘remembering’ thing.

But that suddenly ceased to matter when his subconscious finally deigned to get caught up on the clicking. He knew that sound, there was only one thing that made that sound, only one creature that used its mandibles to produce that irritating, high pitched repetitive clicking.

Drone.

In a flash Karkat was on his feet. He didn’t even wait for the sudden dizziness to subside before wrenching a sickle out of his sylladex and spinning about to locate the threat. There were three of them, hulking black shapes no more than a hundred feet away and approaching, clicking and watching him as he went into stance. There really wasn’t much he could do about them, but he’d be damned if he was going out without a fight, after all that. As soon as he could remember what all that was, at least.

The closest two stopped in their tracks and Karkat could have sworn that they traded a very quick side glance. The third one nearly collided with their backs and stumbled a little before righting itself and he saw that it was carrying what appeared to be a bundle of paper scrolls. The foremost one stepped aside and made an awkward motion towards them, clicks revving up into a rather irritated whirr. Carrier dropped the scrolls by its feet and Leader waved all of them back before stepping back itself and fixing Karkat with its glare again.

Very carefully and without taking his eyes off the drones, he approached the pile and nudged it with his foot. One of the scrolls fell open, revealing itself as a roll of graph paper. Carrier edged a little closer and tossed a bundle of charcoal pencils onto the pile before retreating again. They were building drones.

Karkat growled in the most adult timbre he could muster, “So, what is this? You expect me to design a hive?”

The drones all bobbed a bit in their version of nodding.

“But I’m…” he began, before quickly reconsidering his approach, “haaappy to do that, yeah, sure…”

Whatever was going on here, he would hardly find out about it reduced to giblets, so he knelt down on the grass and started to draw. He only knew the absolute basics, but he still had a certain sense or instinct for it, even though he knew why that was now. Just one of these mysteries again he had never asked for a solution of. Maybe he wasn’t all that keen on finding out where he was, after all. All the answers he tended to get to questions only ever made matters worse, and this wasn’t too bad so far, as nightmares went.

Though he wasn’t quite sure. This didn’t really feel like a dream bubble, but he knew the distinction could be blurry when one was dead. As he most likely was. No, as he definitely was. He remembered remembering now. Remembering that he died and having the bubbles solidify around him in answer. Which meant that this was a memory of building his hive? That would be a very likely theory, except for the fact that he had never actually done that. His hive had been provided for him and the drones never came to him. Exhibit A in favor of this memory was the fact of his continued existence.

He snook a quick glance to the drones, which were just standing there, barely moving and watching him with whatever expression he could care to project onto the damned things’ blank faces. Shouldn’t they give him at least some restrictions as to what he was allowed to build? Ah yes, there it was. One one the papers turned out to be a list of his allotted building material, as well as a figure for the sum he could spend on interior furnishing and equipment. He frowned at it. This was a lot more than he remembered having. He would have to look up the exact figures sometime, but this placed him somewhere in the, what, greens? They thought he was olive? Not that he wanted to argue, and he was very unlikely to get any answers out of them anyway.

As he continued to draw the hive, he knew already that he would not be using half of it. Sure, a little more space was nice, but this felt just ostentatious. He needed to use the material though, so he just grouped his respiteblock and rumpusblock close to the load gaper and all the other extraneous blocks around that. Actually, this was quite good. This way he had short treks from the coon to the trap, but anyone coming to his home would need to find their way through numerous rooms before they found him. It felt defensible. And he could even have visitors now that wouldn’t look down their noses at…

Visitors. Wait. Friends. How could he have forgotten? His friends, where were they? Images returned to his memory, flashes of color and fire. Heat. Screaming. Terezi, covered in blood and screaming in rage and pain.

Eyes staring into his, slowly turning from bright red to orange as he fell away from them.

 


	2. ==> Gamzee: Listen

There were flames in the distance. Not the indistinguishable roaring mass that devours forests, but the small, flickering, lonely ones that burn up out of hard earth or snow. One by one they were coming to life again, some stuttering, some strong and bright, illuminating the spaces around them and reaching out into the darkness, searching. If only someone could call to them.

There was also a sound, much closer and and more real, a murmuring and swooshing of ocean waves against the shore, but the underground was dry and sandy, easily giving way to burrowing fingers. The air was warm and a soft breeze was wafting in from the water, carrying the scent of seaweed and salt, familiar like a home from a different life.

Gamzee lay on his back with his eyes closed and just listened. He remembered faintly once knowing something about the ocean being dangerous, and that he shouldn’t be just lying next to it, but this did not translate well into his present mind, let alone into any plan of action. It did not really make sense that the ocean could be dangerous anymore. After all, what were the odds that it was even the same ocean he used to sit next to all that time ago? 

How long ago was it? He really had no way of knowing or even telling if the concept applied here, nor did he care. He just idly mused about how strange it was that he couldn’t tell and wondered if anyone in the ocean knew maybe. Or how long that ocean had even been around itself. Or how long he would have to wait this time. Nothing seemed to be happening, but he supposed it could start again any minute now. Anyway, there was enough to do as it was, with the ocean’s sounds to listen to and the inventory to take. A quick assessment of that made it obvious that it was easier to list the things that were missing.

A check confirmed that his sylladex was indeed gone, completely. He hadn’t known that they could be lost, but apparently he managed to do just that. No more colors, no more miracles. It was a weird and inconvenient way to retrieve items anyway, he supposed. But all the items he had were gone too, even if he didn’t know what he had in the end. Probably just a bunch of bottles. His clothes he still had, at least most of them. He tugged a bit at the cloth by his side and a handful broke off in his fingers. He reached up for his hood, but that was completely gone now and he felt nothing but his horns and hair. It felt really strange somehow, like his hand was very far away from him and it would take forever to get it to tell him what it felt, if he cared enough to concentrate on the feeling in his fingers. It was just distant and muted, almost like the ocean waves when he stopped listening.

The second obvious thing that was missing was the pain. It was strange and disorienting, like missing the last step on stairs, like looking at something you know was there just to find it gone. He mentally checked his whole body, but nothing hurt. In fact, nothing felt like much of anything. He couldn’t even feel his joints anymore and he only felt his skin where it contacted with the sand that was strange and malleable under him, but not unpleasant. He could breath as deeply as he liked now and he did that for a while, waiting for his expanding ribcage to crack and stab him, but nothing happened, except that now he could also hear the air going in and out of his nose in rhythm with the waves. They were so similar, these sounds, like sighing.

But the unreal sounds were also gone. There was complete silence in his head, no more whispering or screaming. He could hear his own thoughts, dimly, but they were not shouting anymore either, just faintly murmuring around his head, stopping briefly to look at whatever he was trying to think about and then leaving again, returning to what he could hear outside of his head.

It did not feel to him as if time was passing. He was just in a state of continued existence and it would have baffled him if he could have focused his thoughts for long enough to be baffled. After a while though he opened his eyes. It was night, but the purple moon was full in the sky and bathed the beach in its tinted glow, almost outshining the stars. They were very pretty and he hoped he would have some more time to look at them. Whatever happened next, he just hoped it would take a while longer to start happening and leave him for now in peace. He couldn’t recognize any of the constellations and he wondered idly what time it was and if he would have cause to move before the sun rose. It would not be a good thing to lie on the beach when it got light again, but then again, what choice did he have? 

His limbs seemed to be a million miles away and he was unsure if he could get them to move even if he wanted to. He tried to concentrate on his legs to give one of them an experimental twitch. He could feel the sand move under him, so he supposed he must have moved somehow, but before he could try a second time his thoughts just wandered off again and he couldn’t be bothered to chase them. And so he just lay there, watching the stars twinkle and the moon slowly crawl across the sky, in silence but for the murmuring waves.


	3. ==> Terezi: Hit the ground running

The drop came as a surprise, but it was nothing she couldn’t handle. Out of a full dive she fell a few feet and just rolled, shed her jet pack like a jacket and sprinted on. Breathing was hard and she could only seem to inhale half way, but her legs had not failed her yet. 

Slowly as she ran her surroundings swam into focus through the overwhelming smell of blood. She was running on grass that gave off clouds of green fragrance with every step and not far from her loomed a forest, dark green and black, old with decaying leaves and motionless air. Though the colors were muted and warped and wouldn’t form a clear picture in her mind, she knew these plants as well as the patterns swirling in the air. She was on Alternia. 

This meant the door had worked, probably, which was the good news and also about the extent of it. Where were the others? Who was even still alive? She considered calling out for people, but she was likely drawing enough attention to herself as it was, running and bleeding and blinded. And if that wasn’t bad enough, it was also far too bright, light filtering through the scarf and giving blinding little highlights to the smell of leaves from the approaching tree line. It didn’t seem to hurt yet, but that just might have been the pain in her chest spreading out over her body and blotting out all other sensations. Still, she needed to get out of the sun right away.

Reaching the forest was at least some improvement. There were tall, thick trees here that made for a very dense canopy, but the smell of leaves was disorienting and colliding with any trunks would have likely made her look rather stupid, if there was anyone here to laugh. But before anything like that could happen, her right leg connected with the ground, buckled under her and sent her sprawling. It didn’t even hurt, it just felt cold and numb. She tried to get to her feet, but her arms wouldn’t hold up her weight and her joints wouldn’t bend. Her lungs burned and she couldn’t quite remember how to get air in as she heard a voice approaching. It was not laughing though, it was crying out frantically, fading slowly as the last remnants of consciousness slipped from her grasp.

“Terezi!? Oh my god, Terezi!”

 

Very slowly wakefulness returned to her, in fits and starts and disjointed thoughts. Something about flames? Something was burning? Steady, steady flames… What? With a sudden start she was fully awake. She found herself lying in the corner of a small cave. The floor was lined with furs and furs also hung on the walls between crude drawings in red and black. Chiseled windows let in soft starlight. She turned her head to see a familiar figure crouching beside her. Short pointy horns and a round gray face, once so often seen smiling now scrunched up in concern, green tinted tears in the corners of the eyes.

“Nepeta…” she tried to say but seized up with coughing and gentle hands helped her to sit up. The pain in her chest was hot and constricting and her face and horns were burning. 

“There you go, nice and easy, don’t worry, you’re safe now…” Nepeta murmured and pressed a bowl of water into her hands, “drink slowly…”

Drinking felt like the best thing in the world right then, despite the ache in her jaw. The water was very cold and seemed to ease the heat in her face somewhat. She carefully put down the bowl and tried to sit up straight without leaning on Nepeta’s hands.

“Uh, sorry…” Nepeta said and took her hands away. Terezi snorted, which promptly made all her ribs sting. Sitting up hurt, but it felt a lot less like dying, so she just weakly shuffled around until she could lean her back against the cave wall and get a good look at Nepeta. She looked a little older than Terezi remembered, but probably not as much as she herself did. She also apparently no longer painted her lips and she wasn’t wearing a cat bonnet.

“So,” Terezi tried again, “what happened to you?”

“The memories are all so fuzzy, I don’t think I really know? The last thing I remember is a part of Equius trying to apologize? But I was only a part of me, it was very confusing. Then I had a lot of dreams, but the dreams broke. Next thing I know, I woke up here, a few weeks ago. I started to think it was all a bad dream.”

“Huh, well, that kinda makes sense…”

“But what about you? You look positively awful!”

Terezi tried to smile, though stretching her lips hurt a lot. “Not pawsitively pawful?”

Nepeta did not smile. “No.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…”

“It’s alright. You can make puns if you want to! I just… don’t. Not right now.”

Terezi sighed. “Yeah well, the long and short of it is that three people tried to kill me, but failed. Well, or two people tried, I guess. Maybe just one, in the end. I can’t even tell. Combined efforts of a fish bitch, a spider bitch and a clown bitch. And a puppet. This might very well be the dumbest thing to ever happen to anyone.”

“It doesn’t look dumb to me. It looks deadly and painful.”

“It will need more than this to take down the mighty dragon!”

Nepeta looked away. “It’s true though. I know you’re joking, but you survived a lot more than anyone would have. I don’t want to meet whoever could do that to you… or maybe I do.”

“Aw, are you getting all protective of me now? That’s so sweet!”

Nepeta coughed. “Anyway! Then what happened?”

“I don’t have the faintest idea. A door opened, I fled through it. You should ask someone else about that.”

“Because they know?”

“Because they might actually want to talk about it. Sorry.”

“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrogate you like that. I guess I don’t even care that much anymore. I just want to know where everyone is.”

“Yeah, so do I. Did you see anyone else?” Terezi said and shifted around a bit, trying to find a more comfortable position. 

“No… Just you. And I’m very glad I found you! But…”

“But you miss him, right?”

“Yeah, well, can’t pull the fur over the eyes of the Seer of Mind, can I?”

“Nepeta, you miss your moirail. That’s kind of a forgone conclusion, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, probably. I do hope he’s alright. He didn’t seem alright when I last saw him, but that was a long time ago? I think?”

“Who knows? You must have come from the dream bubbles. Was he there too? Have you tried contacting him in any way?”

“I already tried messaging him, but he doesn‘t answer me.”

They both sit in silence until it became a little awkward.

“Well anyway,” Nepeta said, “I should clean up here. Oh and bring you more water, I’ll do that!” She got up and stretched.

“Nepeta?”

“Yeah?”

“Thank you. For saving me. And if I can be any help at all soon, I’ll help you find him.”

This at least made her smile a little. “You’re welcome. And thank you too! It seems up to the dragon and the cat to find the big dumb hoofbeast then?”

“It does indeed.”


	4. ==> Kanaya: Go into the light

Kanaya found herself walking over a wide, grassy plain some time near dawn. The weather was fair and warm, even if the occasional gust of wind was chilly and ruffled the long grass that was wetting the hem of her skirt with dew. The stars were slowly fading in the sky as the horizon grew pale. She must have been walking for some time, she thought, judging by the tired feeling in her legs, but she couldn’t see much else to do and so she just kept on walking, alone with her thoughts. She remembered bits and pieces of her last moments in the game, and some stood out clear and painful while others just felt like the fraying parts of a vague dream. She gathered that she must have been in the dream bubbles and that those are the parts that are fuzzy, which did make a bit of sense.

The plain she was on felt very real. The ground was solid and nothing around her was shifting, though something here felt vaguely precarious, like a balance barely maintained, a moving system held together by good will and string. The air felt very familiar and even though she didn’t recognize the surroundings or any of the stars, she was quite certain that this was indeed the planet she once called home. She wished she knew where everyone was. It was very lonely out here and there were so many people who might be around somewhere, or who might not be. Those she last remembered being with in the bubbles, could they be here? Out of habit, she tried to think of her last memory to will the landscape to shift around her and bring her to them, but she was not surprised when nothing happened. This was certainly not a dream, whatever else it might be.

Slowly the sky grew brighter in front of her. She was walking towards the sunrise and the color cast by the sun bled across half the dome in beautiful shades of red and purple. She had seen many a sunrise like this, but still something seemed distinctly strange about this one. It took a while for her to realize that he sun had come up over the horizon and she was looking straight at it. It was very bright, but it did not blind her. It looked cool almost, a darker shade of yellow and its rays warmed the air around her without really heating her skin.

On Alternia she could stand in the sun without getting hurt, but never had she been able to look at it directly without pain and she was suddenly completely sure that this was not the Alternian sun. Though he supposed that it could possibly have moved further away, she knew it hadn’t. She was sure that it was at the same distance though, just smaller itself, cooler and more friendly.

She found that walking like this, staring at the sun and not paying attention, was a very bad idea when she suddenly felt the ground under her feet change abruptly from grass to stone and she narrowly avoided falling down the sheer cliff face that suddenly opened up before her. She jumped back a pace and took a brief moment to breathe and recover from the shock and then re-approached the edge to peer down. It went down a long way, at least a hundred feet to where it met a narrow beach. Beyond it the ocean stretched out to the horizon, glinting in the sunlight.

She looked back down along the beach to see a figure huddled against the cliff face almost directly below her, and as she watched it slowly peeled off the wall and stood up uncertainly, using one arm to shield its face from the sun. Apparently it came to realize that the sunlight was harmless when it lowered the arm and Kanaya gasped. She knew those horns!

“Vriska!!!” She shouted down and Vriska turned about a bit in confusion before she finally located the source of her cry and looked up to spot her. For a while she just stood there and stared, but then, to Kanaya’s dismay, she started climbing.

The cliff was sheer and very jagged, though it thankfully didn’t have an overhang. Also Vriska seemed a lot more adept at climbing than Kanaya would have expected, but she still barely dared to breathe while watching her. She moved faster than Kanaya would have liked, but her movements were steady and unhasty, and after a long, interminable wait at last she reached the edge. Kanaya lay down flat on her stomach and reached down to help, but Vriska ignored her outstretched hand and quickly pulled herself over and got to her feet. Then she just stood there, panting slightly and grinning down at Kanaya like a meowbeast who got the cream. All of it.

“Wellwellwell, look who I found! If it isn’t miss fussyfangs in the flesh!”

Kanaya frowned and got to her feet with as much dignity as she could muster and brushed herself off. Before she could even think of a suitable dressing down for that reckless climb she abruptly decided on a different tactic, moved forward and wrapped her arms around Vriska, who just stood there, stiff as a board and holding her breath. Just as Kanaya wanted to move back and maybe apologize for the indecorous invasion of personal space, she found frighteningly strong arms wrapped around her and nearly crushing her against a firm chest. 

When Vriska let go again she was still grinning, now with rather thoughtful glint in her eyes. “I do hope you have been fussy enough to find out a few things about this place? Just because it’s you, I may not mind admitting that I have a few questions.”

Kanaya found herself smiling as well. It seemed so long ago, forever and a lifetime in fact, that she had last seen that grin and those eyes. So many things had happened and she knew she would have to do a great deal of sorting through them, as well as separating the dreams from the real, before she even knew where they really stood now. But she decided that there would always be time for that later and that for now she was allowed to simply enjoy the presence of an old friend.

“Unfortunately I have not been able to be too fussy on this plain. Not much to fuss with, until now.”

Vriska laughed loud and long. “You got me there, I ran right into that one! But seriously, do you know what the deal of this place is? It doesn’t feel like a dream bubble.”

“I don’t think it is. It feels very real to me, if slightly unconventional.”

“If that isn’t an understatement! What’s up with the sun not burning my eyes out, by the way?”

“Hm. I might be wrong, but I do believe that while this is actually Alternia, or a very good replication at least, that is not our old sun. Why ever that may be.”

“Space is your deal, I believe you. So we got a shiny new planet as well as a new sun? That isn’t bad loot for a few eternities of pirating, I suppose. Though I gather you don’t know what actually happened?”

“I do not. Though I hope to find that out, among other things.”

“Yeah, me too. Though it would be easier if we weren’t stranded here in the backside of absolutely nowhere.”

“Indeed. What do we do now?”

“Well, I know what you will do. You will go and find more people to meddle with. And I plan on getting all of my irons back in the fire as soon as possible, of course!”

“And what irons would that be?”

“Ah, I don’t know! New planet, new fire, entirely new set of irons! Be prepared to be unprepared for what I’ll do next!”

Together they started walking again, following the edge of the cliff to the west. They had to start looking somewhere, after all.

 


	5. ==> Sollux: Contact Karkat

\-- twinArmageddons [TA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]\--  


TA: hopey 2hiiz KK!  
TA: you actually came onliine.  
TA: ii wa2 wonderiing when you would get your a22 back iin the game.  
CG: AWESOME CHOICE OF WORDS THERE BULGEMUNCH.  
CG: AND WHAT A GREAT WAY TO GREET SOMEONE YOU HAVEN’T SEEN IN FOREVER.  
CG: I AM SO TOUCHED.  
TA: ii 2uppo2e iit wa2 unrea2onable of me two a22ume that you would lay off the 2houtiing ju2t thii2 once.  
TA: after takiing forever two fiind your computer.  
TA: or two get iit turned on? ii never can tell wiith you.  
CG: IT TOOK FOREVER TO GET DELIVERED IS WHAT HAPPENED.  
CG: AFTER IT TOOK FOREVER TO GET MY HIVE BUILT.  
CG: I LITERALLY SPENT THE LAST WEEK UNDER A CONSTRUCTION DRONE CART LIKE A WIGGLER.  
TA: hahaha, that ii2 awe2ome!  
TA: 2o they made you buiild your hiive agaiin?  
CG: NOT REALLY *AGAIN*.  
CG: I NEVER GOT TO BUILD ONE THE FIRST TIME.  
CG: BUT NOW I DID.  
CG: AND TO MAKE MATTERS EVEN STRANGER, JUDGING BY THE BUILDING MATS I GOT AND THE MONEY TO SPEND THEY SEEM TO THINK I’M SOME SHADE OF GREEN.  
TA: huh, really?  
TA: that ii2 iintere2tiing.  
TA: 2o you are ju2t rolliing iin the dough now?  
CG: PRETTY MUCH. YOU SHOULD SEE THIS HUSKTOP I HAVE, IT WOULD MAKE YOU GREEN TOO. WITH ENVY THAT IS.  
TA: dream on kk. ii got my entiire 2etup back!  
TA: don’t a2k me how they diid iit, but iit even ha2 all the old confiiguratiion2 and everythiing.  
TA: though of cour2e ii have two 2et iit up agaiin from 2cratch two make 2ure no one fucked wiith iit.  
TA: whiich wiill take for fuckiing ever.  
TA: but once that ii2 done ii’ll look you up iin the 2y2tem.  
TA: 2ee why they thiink you are green of all thiing2.  
TA: you haven’t checked, have you?  
CG: CHECKED WHAT?  
TA: Your color.  
CG: WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THAT?  
CG: DO YOU PRICK YOUR FINGER EVERY MORNING TO SEE IF YOU’RE STILL GRUBSAUCE?  
CG: OR DON’T YOU NEED TO BECAUSE YOU HOLD YOUR NETHER ORIFICES UP TO YOUR EYES EVERY TEN MINUTES ANYWAY?  
CG: OF COURSE I HAVEN’T CHECKED.  
TA: okok, ju2t wonderiing. 2tranger thiing2 have happened.  
CG: NO THEY HAVE NOT. PEOPLE DON’T JUST WAKE UP ONE MORNING TO DISCOVER THEY HAVE SUDDENLY BEEN PROMOTED TO OFFICIAL MEMBER OF THE GENETICALLY UNFREAKY CLUB.  
CG: …  
CG: OK I CHECKED. STILL THE SAME SWILL.  
TA: hahahaha, that wa2 a joke!  
TA: diid you really thiink iit2 more liikely that your blood color changed than that there wa2 2ome miix-up iin the cen2u2?  
TA: 2o gulliible KK.  
CG: A VERY HEARTFELT AND TEARFUL FUCK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY BLOODPUSHER HUDGEMUNCH!!  
TA: jee2h, 2o 2en2iitiive.  
TA: anyway, iit ii2 iintere2tiing that they made you buiild your hiive.  
TA: ii found miine the way ii left iit. 2o diid AA, by the way.  
CG: YOU HAVE SPOKEN TO THE OTHERS?  
TA: ju2t her for now. you are the fiir2t two come on after her.  
CG: ALRIGHT JUST TWO PEOPLE TO WORRY ABOUT THEN.  
CG: AWESOME.  
TA: you don’t have two worry about u2 at all.  
TA: we are home agaiin. worryiing ii2 a thiing you can 2top doiing.  
TA: you wiill fiind other way2 two fiill the hole iin your liife.  
CG: FUCK YOU! I WILL STOP WORRYING WHEN YOU ALL STOP ACTING LIKE A HERD OF MEOWBEASTS.  
TA: iin2piiriing word2 from 2omeone who once proclaiimed, at great volume, that he wa2n’t our leader anymore.  
CG: IM NOT! THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU CAN GO AROUND AND DO WHATEVER.  
CG: WHICH IS BOUND TO BE THE MOST STUPID AND DANGEROUS THING YOU CAN DO AT ANY GIVEN TIME.  
TA: ugh, why do ii even do thii2 two my2elf?  
CG: I THINK WE BOTH KNOW THE ANSWER TO THAT.  
CG: BUT WAIT… YOU SAID WE WERE HOME AGAIN?  
TA: iit 2eem2 that thii2 ii2 actually alterniia, ye2, or at lea2t a very conviinciing copy.  
TA: AA ii2 tryiing two fiind out more riight now and ii wiill two a2 2oon a2 ii get my 2etup back on.  
CG: OH HOW GREAT.  
TA: ii2n’t iit ju2t?  
CG: THAT WAS SARCASM IDIOT.  
TA: 2o was miine.  
TA: but iif you are 2tiill readiing thii2 and not rolliing around the floor iin a paniic,  
TA: there 2eem two be quiite a few diifference2.  
CG: LIKE WHAT?  
TA: well for one there are adult2 here.  
CG: WHAT THE GRUBSUCKING FUCK!?  
TA: yeah ii know.  
TA: 2cared the 2hiit out of me when ii 2aw one from the wiindow.  
TA: but they don’t 2eem two be tryiing anythiing for now.  
TA: they 2ort of ju2t, ii dunno, liive here?  
CG: SOLLUX WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?  
CG: AND WHY THE FUCK IS THAT SUPPOSED TO STOP ME FROM PANICKING?  
TA: nothiing wiill 2top you from paniickiing.  
TA: ii ju2t wanted two tell you becau2e iit ii2 iimportant for you two know.  
TA: anyway, ii need two get back two 2ettiing up my 2y2tem.  
TA: al2o ii need two fiind 2hiit out.  
TA: ju2t keep an eye on trolliian iin ca2e anyone el2e 2how2 up.  
TA: and try not two do anythiing dumb  
TA: But ju2t for the record?  
CG: WHAT?  
TA: iit2 good two know you are here.  


\-- twinArmaggedons [TA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticis [CG] \--  


Sollux pushed his chair away from the keyboard a bit and sighed, rubbing his eyes. KK had made it through. The only thing possibly more aggravating than his persistent gray capslock was the sense of overwhelming relief he felt at seeing it again. But still, had it really been necessary to tell him that? Ugh, yeah, probably. Time to get back to business though. He checked on the neat row of loading bars signifying a number of subsystem scrubs and then rubbed his eyes again. This would take a while and he was getting a headache. Might as well get some water while he waited. 

His nutrition block looked as impeccably clean as always. Well, like most times. Perks of never using it for anything but instant noodles. Just out of curiosity he opened the thermal hull anyway, and stopped dead in shock. He had never seen anything like it. Whoever had set this up for him clearly had no idea what he ate. The thing was not only full, it contained food that actually needed cooling. If he ate all that he’d likely get vitamin poisoning. Though some of the fruit like things did look very good indeed, even if he barely knew what they were. He might just be persuaded to risk it.

In the door he also found a large white carton containing, will wonders never cease, migraine pills, regular pain medication and what appeared to be some kind of mineral supplement. This world had got to be kidding him.


	6. ==> Aradia: Go deeper

\-- apocalypseArisen [AA] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA] \--  


AA: hi sollux!  
AA: have you contacted karkat yet??  
TA: ye2 ii have.  
TA: and what a lovely experiience that wa2.  
TA: gave me a whole new flavor of headache thii2 tiime.  
AA: i know you missed him  
AA: dont pretend you didnt!  
AA: also your crush on him is still showing  
AA: you might want to put that away again?  
TA: 2hut up, AA.  
TA: that wa2 a long a22 tiime ago and liiterally iin another uniiver2e you could really 2tand two giive iit a re2t.  
TA: al2o ii challenge you two talk two hiim for a2 long a2 ii diid and not get a headache.  
AA: so cute!  
TA: ii wiill block you.  
TA: fiinger hovering over the button riight now AA.  
TA: why don’t you tell me real quiick what you want before ii pre22 iit by acciident?  
AA: I have found a lot of things  
AA: these are very interesting ruins and I will need a lot of time till I make sense of them  
TA: plea2e just tell me there aren’t any frog2.  
AA: no frogs  
AA: but a lot of writing on the wall chiseled with metal tools!!  
TA: ok, fa2ciinatiing.  
AA: it is actually! This is no writing I ever saw on old alternia! the tools used also do not match up with the age of the masonry  
TA: what doe2 that mean?   
AA: it just means that this particular civilization took a very different path through history than our own did  
TA: 2o we aren’t on alterniia after all?  
AA: either that or its just a very alternate alternia  
TA: ugh, really?  
AA: hehehe  
AA: but what does karkat say? anything interesting?  
TA: iintere2tiing new made up 2wear word2 for one.  
TA: but al2o that they made hiim buiild hi2 hiive and order iin hii2 2tuff liike a wiiggler.  
AA: interesting  
TA: and they apparently deciided he wa2 a miidblood and showered hiim wiith all kiind2 of expensiive 2hiit.  
AA: very interesting!  
TA: really.  
AA: no   
AA: but im sure you will get to the bottom of it  
AA: though we should learn as much about this place as we can  
AA: if there really are adults around we had better not risk any social missteps  
TA: what do you mean iif!?  
TA: ii told you, ii 2aw her! and 2he wa2 huge! had a rack that could 2kewer a wiild oiinkbea2t!  
TA: ii’m not leaviing my hiive iin a hurry, that’2 for fuckiing 2ure.  
AA: sollux you are very capable of defending yourself stop being such a wussypants  
TA: 2hut up.   
TA: gotta go, 2y2tem2 are about two reboot.  
TA: don’t get hiit over the head wiith any rock2.  
AA: talk to you later sollux  
AA: don’t get eaten by any scaaaary adults!!!  


\-- twinArmageddons [TA] blocked apocalypseArisen [AA] \--  


Aradia giggled. Poking Sollux just never lost its appeal. Also Karkat being here was very good news. Not just because it was good to have him back, but also because it likely meant that the others had made it too. Being dead wasn’t nearly all it was cranked up to be, but being dead in another universe, or outside the universe, might have been another matter entirely. She could admit to having been just a little bit worried.  


For now there were more ruins to explore, even if they were a bit disappointing when compared to the old frog. At least she wasn’t likely to find anything world destroying here. What she was standing in had likely been a small settlement way back when, and now it was just a collection of broken down walls that barely reached up to her hip and they were so densely covered in creepers and weeds that they were hard to even see from a distance. Clearing the plants away had revealed very old, very well made bricks, not of clay but of solid stone that didn’t seem native to the area. Also there was the writing on some of them which Sollux had failed to be fascinated by. It was impossible to translate any of it without some kind of key, so Aradia just snapped a few pictures and moved on. The fact of their existence and the tools that made them were more interesting for now than their meaning. Writing on building walls was mostly of the less culturally enlightening variety anyway.  


She walked along what must have been the main road and chose a gap in the wall at random to walk through. She didn’t get further than a few steps however before the floor gave way beneath her with a sick, wet crunch and she fell straight down, closely avoiding tangling her horns and wings in the creeper growths that had completely hidden the hole from sight. She barely had time to catch herself mid fall before she landed somewhat ungently on the wet, slimy underground some ten feet below. It was almost entirely dark around her, just a little dim light filtering through the hole she came through, illuminating only the ground immediately around her. It was covered with a thick layer of stinking black moss. Quickly she fumbled for her flashlight and got it switched on just as she heard many small feet scramble away from her light.  


Shining it around revealed that she was standing in a long passageway with a very low ceiling, probably a sewer, made out of the same black stones as the bricks above. It smelled strongly of decaying plants and fungi, but nothing worse, so she slowly made her way down the passage, carefully watching her step and taking note of her direction. Now this was more like it!


	7. ==> Feferi: Survey the Flotsam

The sun was already high in the sky when Feferi reached the surface. It had been a long way up from where she had found herself, in midst of the darkness and crushing depths that had once housed her lusus. She was gone now, Feferi had checked, and also she could no longer hear the whispers. She wondered what had made her think she would find her, and why this place felt so much more alive than all the previous dream bubbles. Or for that matter, why she could no longer hear the horrorterrors either.

She could now see the sun shining bright through the water’s surface, but something was different about it. It was dimmer, less blinding and seemed so friendly that she ignored her instincts and breached through into the open air, spun around and dove back down, just to do it again. It was good to have saltwater again, even if it was under a foreign sun.

When she came up the third time she stayed afloat, adjusted her breathing and looked around. The trench she had come out of turned out to be a swift drop-off from the shore, which seemed to be just about half a mile away. As she sped towards it she saw a broad yellow beach ending in tall dunes that climbed up the banks and concealed the land behind them. Between them stood a tall purple hive. The closer she got the clearer she could also see a dark shape lying on the sand. It did not appear to be moving.

At last the shore flattened out beneath her and she rose from the water, pushing her tangled hair out of her face. The figure on the beach was a troll, lying flat on his back and staring up into the sky. He was wearing tattered purple rags that were barely clinging to his bony frame. His hair was a tangled, matted mess and his long, spiring horns were half buried in the sand. It actually took her a while to recognize him without his paint, his features are so unfamiliar and even pointier than she ever remembered them. Carefully she approached him. He turned his head towards her slowly and she stopped and took out her trident.

“Fef… Feferi?” He croaked with a parched voice that cracked and was painful to listen to. It was also very quiet and she had to lean in further than she would have liked to understand him at all.

“Yeah, it’s me Gamzee,” she said, “what the ever loving glub happened to you!?”

“Ah, all of it, sister,” he sighed and looked up at the sky again, “all the motherfucking things happened to me. And all the motherfucking things got all happened at others by me.”

“Well, I suppose its good to hear that you haven’t started talking sense, that would be really worrisome. How long have you been lying here?”

“For the time the moon all took to make its journey and half of this here sun’s. Bitchtits sun it all is, doing nothing to get its burn on of a brother no more.”

“Did you just lie out here on the beach and wait to find that out?”

“Ah, I aint got much else all going on now, have I? Thought I might as well get to seeing what all this sun noise was all up and about.”

“Oh… Gamzee, the sun won’t burn you. I don’t know why though. But is that your hive?”

Gamzee turned his head again, but he couldn’t see it from his angle on the ground, so he tried to sit up. It was as if he needed to remember where his limbs were, and he looked down at both his arms before he could seem to get them to move and prop him up so he could look around. Bits of his clothes fell off and stayed in the sand. “Heh, yeah, thats it alright," he said, "wonder how that got all packed up and brought back here, being all not destroyed and shit.”

“Miracles?” Feferi asked without thinking.

He went very still at that and she instinctively took a step back. Even more slowly, still watching all his limbs one after the other, he pulled himself up from the ground and turned to her. He stood very straight and tall, looking down at her. He had no expression whatsoever and she nervously brought up her trident. She didn’t think he could be a match for her, but watching him look at her like that, she suddenly wasn’t so sure. There was something missing from him, and she didn’t think it made him weaker. When he spoke again, it was still barely above a whisper. “Whoever could be knowing that aint me. Might be blaming it on them if you have a mind to, sister. I don’t.”

“Alright! I, um, sorry?” She frowned at her own stammering and tried to get a grip on her nerves. He just stood and stared, as if waiting.

“Um, Gamzee?” She tried again, “what… what are you going to do?”

“Huh. Well, if that doesn’t make at beating me. What are you all up to?”

“I’m going to find everyone! Then I’m going to find out what this place is and how we got here. Then… I don’t know.”

“You have a plan there, sister. Why don’t you get to it?” His posture relaxed somewhat towards the slump he used to have.

“I will. As soon as I get a few answers out of you.”

For the first time his eyes fell on her trident. He pulled his lips back from from his teeth in an unsettling imitation of a smile and gave a terrible little laugh that sounded more like coughing.

“Say, little fishy sister, are you all up and afraid of this motherfucker?”

“No!” she answered immediately, before deciding on a little more honesty, “should I be?”

“Ah, there we go with the questions you all threatened at me, hehe. I’m afraid you won’t get to asking many questions that don’t all get an answer of I don’t motherfucking know.” His expression was still very unsettling, but something in his wrecked voice actually sounded a bit like humor.

“Where is everyone?” She asked, experimentally.

“I don’t motherfucking know.” He answered, still trying to smile.

“Where are we?”

“I don’t motherfucking know.”

“Should I be afraid of you?”

“I don’t motherfucking know.”

Something in his grimace smile changed slightly, some of his teeth disappeared and it suddenly seemed less false. Then that expression fell again and was replaced by a very genuine frown. “It ain’t no joke, I really don’t be knowing. But if you would get your kindness on you would all keep that righteous trident in your hands and not go turning your back on a brother as who knows or don’t.”

Feferi blinked as she unraveled the sentence in her mind. “Is that a threat or are you asking a favor?”

“Favor’s what I’m up and asking. I ain’t gonna tell you what you need to be all feeling none, but I’ll be telling you as I’m feeling all manners of motherfucking terrified for things I don’t fucking know.”

“Alright. Alright, its ok Gamzee. I’ll watch you, I promise. Though I don’t understand.”

He tilted his head at her and slumped a little more. “Thank you. And neither do I. But we all gotta do what feels right up in here, that ain’t never a thing that got to stopping its truthfulness.”

“Okay then. Why don’t we go to your hive, get you some water. Do you have your husktop?”

He frowned a bit and shook his head. Then he turned from her and lead the way up the beach, his feet slipping and sinking in the sand as if he’d forgotten how to walk on it. It was slow going, but Feferi kept her promise and stayed behind him. She tried to remember what little she knew of what he did. She knew he killed basically everyone in one timeline or another, even though she couldn’t quite piece together what happened in the sequence that ended up on top, as it where. When you get all your news from ghosts the reports tend to get muddled a lot. Still, he seemed docile now, or something like it.

They reach his hive without incident and entered. Inside it looked very bare and sparsely furnished, there were no decorations or items lying around, just a recuperacoon in the corner and a table by the wall with some boxes underneath it.

“Ah, motherfuck,” he sighed, “they took all my shit.”

“It does seems rather empty. You must have had a lot more than this once.” Feferi said, looking around.

“Yeah, I did. Though I don’t all know how much I’d still be wanting all that. Maybe they went and did me a favor taking it.”

“Hm, I wonder though… Did they take it, or did they just… not bring it? This can’t be your actual old hive now, can it?”

“Huh, I guess not. Also I’d like to get to knowing who they are as built it back up here all like it used to be like this. And why.”

“Yeah, see! You have questions too!”

He tried to smile again, with a little more success this time. “Maybe we’ll gather all our questions around together, have a bitchin question party all up in this sad block.” He turned away from her towards the door in the furthest wall and then stopped again. “Uh… I was all going to get something for the wicked hydration. This here door leads all up in my nutrition block and no other door gets to leading out of that. You be staying put and I can’t get my sneak on around you.”

“You are really serious about this, aren’t you?”

“I really am all kinds of serious. Please stay here.”

Indeed he didn’t take long and soon came out again carrying two large bottles of water and a very puzzled expression. “Well, if that isn’t a bitching puzzle all around. Motherfuckers took all my stuff, but seemed to think it right go and fill my nutrition block up with all kinds of food and shit. No Faygo, but real motherfucking food all kinds of…” He handed her one of the bottles and opened his own, eyeing it suspiciously. “Ain’t ever had water as came in bottles before none either.” He turned it over a few times in his hands before taking a few sips.

Feferi just decided to risk it again. “Gamzee, I need you to be honest with me here. You say you don’t know if you are a threat, and make extra sure that you can’t be, but I need to know: Do you actually want to hurt me? Because it doesn’t seem like that to me at all.”

Gamzee growled to himself, a low, frustrated noise. “No. I ain’t got a wish to hurt a sister. I ain’t got a wish to hurt any motherfucker. But I get my remember on all too motherfucking clearly that I did put the hurt on all the motherfuckers as were my friends and motherfucking mates in quadrants black and pale, so I’d all say that what I’d be wanting at ain’t got much of a motherfucking say in it!”

He pushed himself of the wall and snarled as he tried to yell, his voice breaking painfully on the last word and he coughed, sinking in on himself until he had slid down the wall to the floor, where he rested his head on his bony knees and whispered between them, “So if you want to get your stay on in this here hive till you found your friends, them’s the rules. I catch you all letting down your guard around me, I kick you the motherfuck out.”

Feferi stared at him, at a loss for words and the sudden threat of tears stinging in her eyes. She would really like to know what he did, but it seemed very unwise to belabor the point, so she just kept her weapon up and him in sight as she moved around the block until something caught her eye in one of the boxes under the table.

“Look, Gamzee, I found your hustop,” she called over to him, but he didn’t stir. It was covered in dust and looked very old. She lifted it out of the box and onto the table. To her surprise, it still booted up without protest.


	8. ==> Tavros: Clean up this mess

It was very early in the morning when Tavros finally got done sorting everything back into the shelves. His Fiduspawn toys didn’t work the way they used to, but he figured that it was nothing that couldn’t be fixed by a healthy dose of overactive imagination. He almost had himself convinced that it could fix everything, but that turned out to be a load of bullshit. In fact he found it increasingly hard to give a shit about all those childish games when none of those he played the actual game with were here. No one was here. Just him and his old hive and a bunch of defunct toys. He gave one of the plastic eggs a kick, so that it rolled under a table. Good enough. 

He could see the sun rising from the eastern window and he went over to watch it. It never stopped being strange, watching the sunrise and knowing that its light was harmless, but it was also very beautiful and he hadn’t missed it once since he came here, looking out from that window at the colors in the sky and also watching the great emptiness around him for any change. The land about his hive was expansive and flat, nothing but grass as far as the eye could see in all directions. Except for now.

While he watched the sun and the grass, this time he did see something new. A black speck in the distance, coming over the plain with some speed. Tavros squinted his eyes against the glare and watched as the speck gained ground and grew into the form of a running troll, making straight for him. Hurriedly, Tavros went to bolt his front door and then returned to the window and waited to see about the quality of this news before it barged in and proved itself as very bad indeed.

The troll turned out to be quite the runner and soon came close enough to be made out clearly against the back lighting as he rushed straight for the door. He was wearing a ridiculous purple cape that flowed behind him in a manner that probably would have maximized the dramatic quality of his entry if he hadn’t tried to run through the door as he opened it, instead failing to get it open and performing a full body collision with it before Tavros could get the latch undone from the inside. Once it opened though he wasted little time getting back on his feet, shoved both the door and Tavros aside with worrying ease, bolted inside and sank to the ground against a wall, panting heavily. His face was blotched an alarming shade of purple, but the area around his nose and eyes was blanched almost white.

“Eridan? Uh, hello…” Tavros said. He really was not prepared for this. “What are you running from? I mean, you know the sun is harmless, right?”

Eridan was still gasping like a fish out of water, but took the time to look down at his hands and then carefully felt his face.

“What? Yeah… of course! Obviously…” he muttered, embarrassed.

“It’s fine, you can admit you didn’t know! It’s just, how far did you run to get here?”

Eridan still seemed very much preoccupied by catching his breath and holding his sides. Tavros decided on a different tactic and just went to get him a glass of water first. “Here, drink this…” he said, handing it down to him.

Eridan hastily chugged half of it, spilling the rest down himself. His hands were shaking, but his breathing was evening out as was the color in his face. “Its… I… “ he stuttered, “I don’t know… two or three miles at least. This land is rid… iculous… ly huge!”

“Oh, wow, ok, that is quite far to run. Are you gonna be ok?”

“Eh, yes… I think so.”

“Ok, that’s good, you are looking a lot less, um, about to drop dead?”

“Thank you ever so much, Tav. No one gives compliments quite like you, has anyone ever told you that?”

Tavros couldn’t help but grin a bit. “I do do my best. So, you don’t want to keep sitting there on the floor. Why don’t you just…” He bent down and pulled Eridan up to his feet and tried to let him go, but his legs were still shaking and he looked very dizzy, so Tavros just kept a hold of him and dragged him over to the sofa, letting him down gently and plopping down next to him.

“So… What happened?” He asked, when it seemed like Eridan wasn’t offering conversation.

“Well, I’m not sure. I was a sprite, you know? Together with Sol, that is, and let me tell you, I do not recommend it. But it’s also really fucking fuzzy, and I can’t remember half of it… Except I think they won? The humans? Anyway, everything went to shit in a woven reed container. Then I woke up on the plain just in time to see the fucking sun rise and I legged it.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I got sprited too… sprited? Made into a sprite? With Vriska.”

Eridan’s eyes widened. “Wow, I can’t imagine she took that well.”

“We didn’t… anyway, all I know about that session was that it had really freaky colors? I think. Maybe that was just the planet. The rest of the time I was dreaming. I was with Vriska for a bit until I left her… And then I was here. I don’t think I’m dead anymore.”

“Well your eyes aren’t white, so I guess not.”

Tavros blinked a few times, trying to feel if his eyes where any different, but they didn’t seem to be. Eridan’s eyes also looked as alive and gray as ever. “Yours aren’t either, by the way,” he said, “but whatever happened I think we should likely ask someone who knows? Uh, whoever that may be…”

“Are there others here too?”

“I don’t know. If they are, they haven’t been online. Their contacts are all still in my trollian, but not a peep so far.”

Eridan looked down at his hands again and rubbed his fingers. “Ah, just as well probably. I don’t really fancy what they would want to say to me right now. I don’t know if you know, but I kinda… fucked shit up. I doubt they would ever want to speak to me again.”

“Oh wow, that is, yeah… You haven’t tried though? Should you really give up hope just like that?”

Eridan glared. “You have some nerve talking to me about hope. That was my role, remember? The destroyer of hope? That’s what my title ended up meaning.”

“Wouldn’t that be, like, incredibly fucked up though? If that was all the game ever meant you to do? What kind of game would it be that goes to a wiggler of six sweeps and says, ‘here, you are the destroyer of hope! Make sure to destroy any and all hope you find, because, you know, it’s what you do!’”

“You may not have noticed, but this whole game was fucked up the wastechute from the very miserable start, Tav.”

Now it was Tavros’ turn to glare. “Oh, I noticed! I also noticed that what people ended up doing also ended up being what they wanted to do! Or what they couldn’t find the will to do… Or did, and then didn’t… You know.” He subsided again. That had definitely sounded more coherent in his head.

“Are you actually trying to get me to believe in free will here?” Eridan asked, sounding far more surprised than Tavros found reasonable.

“I guess? I don’t know. All I know about believing in stuff is that it can get you everywhere or nowhere, and which is which is anyone’s guess.”

“Well thats… actually not encouraging at all, or even much of a thing. Believing in stuff is fucking useless, even believing really strongly doesn’t make anything real.”

“Well don’t then. It’s not like real things ask you to believe in them. That’s just the fake things that do that.”

“Yeah, I guess,” Eridan said, frowning at his empty glass, “though I don’t see what it matters then. If I wanted to do what I did, that’s even worse, isn’t it?”

“Well, yes. But it also means that you can do better now. Make up for the bad things you did… somehow.”

Eridan shrugged. “Yeah, somehow, right. Get back to me on that when you think of the ‘how’, ok?”

“I’m afraid that’s probably up to you. I just mean, there’s always a way, even if it’s really not obvious. I don’t know much about believing in things, if its not believing in yourself that is, but I do know there’s no such thing as a dead end.”

Eridan just sighed and slumped and Tavros went on, “and as for the others, well. It’s not like you were the only one who did fucked up things, right? And got killed for what you did, as far as they told me.”

But Eridan seemed to be done talking. He looked smaller than Tavros had ever seen him, slouched on the sofa and still inspecting the glass as if it held all the answers somehow. Tavros got up from the sofa and went over to his desk and booted up his husktop. He should really try to get some news from someone who wasn’t a ghost. As it turned itself on, Tavros turned back to Eridan.

“You know what?”, he said before he could think better of it, “no matter what you did, you survived the game, just like us. Stay here for now, and we’ll think of something. We’ll not just leave you behind.”

When Tavros turned away again he heard Eridan whisper, as quietly as he could, “thanks, Tav.”


	9. Fruity Reunion Rumpus

\-- cuttlefishCuller [CC] opened memo on board FRUITY REUNION RUMPUS --  


CC: )(-ELLO -EV-ERYONE-E!!!  
CC: Well not everyone Im afraid.  
CC: But t)(ere seem to be at least a few of you online now and I reely, reely )(ope you can read t)(is.  
CC: So if you can read t)(is drop w)(atever you are doing and answer me!  
CG: FEFERI!   
CG: GOD NUBBING CHRIST WILL YOU STOP WITH THE PINGING ALREADY!  
CG: I’M HERE!  
TA: KK you do know you can turn the notiifiicatiion 2ound2 off dont you.  
CG: OF COURSE I DO. DOESN’T STOP THE ANNOYING FLASHING THOUGH.  
TA: actually  
AC: :33 < could you show me how to turn it off sollux? it really is the most annoying sound!  
CG: OH HI NEPETA!   
CG: SURE, LETS JUST TURN THIS INTO SOLLUX’S TECH SUPPORT HOUR, WHY DON’T WE?  
TA: you complaiined fiir2t numbnut2.  
CG: AND IF YOU HAD JUST TOLD ME, INSTEAD OF GETTING SNARKY LIKE ALWAYS WE WOULDN’T HAVE TO HAVE THIS CONVERSATION.  
CG: WHEN THERE ARE CLEARLY MORE INTERESTING THINGS TO DISCUSS.  
CG: LIKE, OH I DON’T KNOW, US LITERALLY COMING BACK FROM THE DEAD!?  
TA: then why dont you 2hut the fuck up?  
GA: Shut Up Both Of You  
GA: Really Shut Up Do Not Just Talk About Shutting Up  
TA: …  
CG: … FINE.  
CC: O)( wow. Did t)(ese memos always go like t)(is?  
AC: :33 < well when karkat and sollux were on them yes  
CC: I t)(ink I remember w)(y I never liked reading them.  
CC: Also I can see w)(y t)(ere used to be so much banning going on.  
CC: Not t)(at I am going to do anyt)(ing of the kind, of course.  
CC: But if everyone could just conduct t)(emselves a little better t)(is actually mig)(t be a useful memo for once.  
CG: WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?  
GA: I Do Not Believe That Her Meaning Was In Any Way Obfuscated  
CG: OH ALRIGHT THEN!  
CG: …  
CG: I’M SORRY, THIS IS REALLY DUMB.  
CG: I…  
CG: I’M GLAD YOU’RE HERE.  
CG: I’LL JUST SHUT UP NOW.  
CC: T)(at is a good idea Karkat. T)(ough we do s)(are the sentiment!  
CC: But still I would like to know w)(o is )(ere exactly.  
CC: Meaning I am now officially culling the reel!  
CC: Please let us know if you are )(ere and w)(ere “)(ere” is for you rig)(t now.  
CG: I’M HERE. IN MY HIVE. THE HIVE I HAD TO BUILD FROM SCRATCH FOR SOME REASON.  
CC: T)(at was very orderly and contained of you Karkat. Next?  
AC: :33 < i am here too! i am in my hive and terezi is here too but she can’t talk right now  
CG: TEREZI!! OH GOD HOW IS SHE?  
AC: :33 < she is resting right now i think she will be alright eventually  
CG: OH FUCK OH FUCK  
CG: PLEASE TELL HER I AM SO SORRY!  
AC: :33 < karkat what did you do?  
CG: I… SHIT I JUST COMPLETELY FAILED HER OK?  
AC: :33 < i won’t relay a message like that!  
AC: :33 < you should tell her that yourself when she wakes up  
CC: Nepeta is rig)(t Karkat. But w)(at )(appened? Is s)(e )(urt?  
AC: :33 < yes  
CC: O)( no! W)(at )(appened to )(er?  
GC: GAMZEE DID.  
CC: O)(.  
GC: WHAT DO YOU MEAN *OH*!?  
CC: Well, to bring some order back into the proceedings.  
CC: I am )(ere. In Gamzees )(ive. Wit)(h Gamzee.   
CG: NO!!!!  
CG: GET OUT  
CG: GET THE FUCK OUT!  
CG: JUST RUN!  
CG: PLEASE!  
CG: OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD FEFERI PLEASE!  
CG: PLEASE NO.  
CC: KARKAT!  
CC: CALM DOWN!  
CC: Just clam down alrig)(t?  
CC: Im fine! -Everyt)(ing is fine. )(es not doing anyt)(ing rig)(t now.  
CC: )(e actually asked me to guard him, I )(ave my eye on )(im.  
CC: I t)(ink I can )(andle one depressed land dweller, its fine!  
CG: IT IS NOT FINE! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT HE CAN DO.  
CG: YOU DON’T KNOW HOW FAST HE CAN MOVE.  
CC: Karkat… W)(at did )(e do to you?  
CG: HE FUCKING TURNED ON US!  
CG: BETRAYED US IN EVERY SESSION.  
CG: KILLED EQUIUS AND NEPETA.  
CG: TORTURED TEREZI.  
CG: BAITED AND KILLED ME.  
CC: O)( no!  
CC: )(e kind of told me that I t)(ink? Or tried to.  
CC: Im sorry Karkat.  
CC: And I t)(ink )(es really sorry too?  
CG: LIKE FUCK HE’S SORRY!  
CG: WAIT.   
CG: WHAT DID YOU MEAN DEPRESSED?  
CC: T)(ats w)(at it looks like at least.  
CC: )(e just told me t)(at )(e doesnt know if )(es dangerous anymore and told me to keep my weapon on )(im.  
CC: And now )(es just sitting against t)(e wall wit)( )(is )(ead on his knees.  
CC: Im sorry for what )(appened to you!  
CC: and Im sorry for Terezi!  
CC: and Im sorry for you Nepeta, and Equius!  
CG: OK, FEFERI, I APPRECIATE THAT.  
CG: AND I KNOW THAT HE LOOKS FUCKING PITIFUL RIGHT NOW.  
CG: TRUST ME, I FUCKING *KNOW*.  
CG: BUT YOU WEREN’T THERE, YOU DIDN’T SEE IT.  
CG: AND YOU ARE BEING REALLY NAIVE IF YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE HIM.  
CG: YOU HAVEN’T SEEN WHAT HE CAN DO.  
CC: Karkat!  
CC: You )(ave also never seen what I can do.  
CC: So please calm down.   
CC: And don’t forget t)(at I know w)(at its like.  
CC: Okay?  
CG: I… YEAH FUCK.  
CG: I’M SORRY.  
CG: PLEASE JUST BE CAREFUL.  


\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] stopped responding to the memo --  


CC: Karkat!  
CC: O)( mot)(erglub!  
AC: :33 < wow that was  
AC: :33 < he and karkat were moirails once yes?  
GA: Yes They Were  
GA: I Must Partially Agree With Karkat Here Feferi  
GA: Please Be Careful  
GA: He Is A Lot More Powerful Than You Would Think  
GA: At Least Under Certain Circumstances  
CC: W)(at do you mean?  
GA: Well To Cut A Long Story Very Short   
GA: On The Meteor Gamzee And Terezi Were Pitch For A While Which Apparently Consisted Of Little More Than Hurting One Another When She Was Most Vulnerable  
GA: What Happened Then Was That Terezi Attacked Gamzee For His Actions Against Her And The Others Before And Gamzee Retaliated By Injuring Her Quite Excessively  
GA: Karkat And I Tried To Save Her And He Killed Karkat  
GA: But When He Had Done That He Just Stopped  
GA: It Is True That He Moves With Incredible Speed And Strength  
GA: But He Did Not Move To Hinder Or Avoid Me When I Came At Him  
GA: And So I Killed Him  
GA: And I Really Can Give You No Clear Account Of His Motives Then Or His State Of Mind Now  
GA: Except That He Is Very Dangerous And You Should Indeed Not Take Your Eyes Off Him For A Second  
GA: Do Not Try To Guess What He Will Do  
GA: And Do Not Forget That He Can Lie  
CC: Alrig)(t. T)(ank you for s)(aring t)(at.  
CC: I promise to be careful.  
AC: :33 < but what are we going to do with him?  
AC: :33 < we cant have feferi watch him forever and we cant leave him alone  
CC: So w)(at do you suggest?  
AC: :33 < me? I don’t know   
AC: :33 < i almost wanted to suggest that you kill him?  
AC: :33 < if there ever was a just death it would be his you know  
AC: :33 < and i tried doing that once but I failed  
AC: :33 < but now we all made it out of the game  
AC: :33 < and some of us did horrible things and in some way he did get killed for what he did already?  
AC: :33 < i dont know its complicated  
AC: :33 < i dont think i could kill him now and i wouldnt ask you to do that  
CC: I cant kill him eit)(er Nepeta, and Im not going to.  
CC: Unless )(e gives me a reason to, I promise.  
CC: I t)(ink I will just )(ave to watc)( )(im for now.  
CC: And I will talk to Karkat again later.  
CC: And wit)( Gamzee too.  
CC: As someone )(e )(as not )(urt, maybe I can do somet)(ing?  
CC: Lets just continue with the role call for now.  
CC: W)(o else is )(ere?  
TA: hopey 2hiit.   
CC: Sollux, )(ow great to )(ear from you! Now could you respond in a more orderly manner?  
TA: ii am beiing orderly a2 2hiit here! ii am iin my hiive re2earchiing the new iinternet and not goiing off on fuckiing REPEATED kiilliing2 2pree2 of my friiend2 and quadrant2.  
TA: apparently that make2 me fuckiing exemplary.  
CC: And if you could also avoid a snarky running commentary on t)(e most traumatic events in your friends lives we would all be very impressed.  
TA: alriight alriight 2orry.  
TA: ii actually found out a bunch of very iintere2tiing 2hiit but maybe that can waiit?   
CC: Just give us the quick version.  
TA: ok 2o we’re on alterniia. a ver2iion of iit that ha2 not achiieved deep 2pace exploratiion yet. we are al2o not an empiire, but more of a planetary monarchy ii gue22?  
TA: our 2overeiign ii2 her maje2tiic harmony the queen.  
TA: but apart from that iit2 pretty much the 2ame.  
TA: oh except for the fuckiing adult2 runniing around obviiou2ly.  
TA: iim 2endiing you all the relevant liink2 though.  
CC: T)(ank you Sollux.  
CC: Could you please also attac)( a list of t)(e most prominent cullable offenses?  
CC: Everyone s)(ould stay out of sig)(t until we are familiar with t)(em.  
TA: yeah riight. iill do that.  
TA: though apparently mandatory collectiion by drone2 ii2 no longer a thiing.  
TA: whiich make2 2en2e 2eeiing a2 we are actually pretty well populated.  
TA: iit2 a biit weiird not beiing 2pread over a galaxy anymore.  
CC: Well t)(ats good news at least!  
CC: O)(, and Sollux? If you come across any really c)(eesy romance flicks, maybe send t)(em to Karkat? Just not, you know, t)(e pale ones.  
TA: yeah you got iit.  
CC: Great, w)(o else?  


\-- apocalypseArisen [AA] responded to the memo --  


AA: im sorry im late im kind of in the middle of something  
AA: or underneath something if you will  
AA: reception is bad down here  
AA: but anyway i found my hive and a really expansive underground tunnel system below these ruins!  
TA: at lea2t someone2 happy to be back.  
AA: indeed!! apparently our civilization here took a totally different route through history than our old one! which means that this planet is not a mere copy of old alternia but rather a new seeding  
CC: T)(at is fascinating Aradia! You s)(ould totally tell us all about it as soon as my orderly role call is done!  
AA: hahaha ok!  
CC: Alright, w)(os next?  
GA: I Believe That Would Be Me   
GA: I Am Here With Vriska  
GA: We Are Currently Rather Lost Im Afraid  
GA: But We Are On A Wide Open Plain If That Helps  
CC: u)(…  
TA: 2eriiou2ly? ugh ju2t piing me priivately on trolliian iill piinpoiint your po2iitiion and look up your hiive2.  
TA: moron2.  
GA: Sollux You Do Really Make It Difficult Sometimes To Show Gratitude For Your Help  
GA: But Thank You Nonetheless  
CC: A)(, Sollux, could you do t)(at for me too? I )(avent found my )(ive yet eit)(er.  
TA: 2ure.  
AT: uH, cOULD YOU DO THAT FOR ERIDAN TOO,  
AT: hE ALSO KIND OF MISPLACED HIMSELF,  
AT: wE ARE HERE, bY THE WAY, aT MY HIVE,  
AT: wHICH I FOUND, jUST BY WAKING UP IN IT,  
TA: yeah 2ure iill do that. ju2t let me look up the deepest poiint of the ocean.  
TA: can you tell hiim two go there and 2tay there?  
TA: and al2o tape hiis giill2 2hut?  
CC: Sollux, please s)(ut up.  
CC: And Tavros, about -Eridan, is )(e ok?  
TA: 2eriiou2ly FF? you have got two be 2hiittiing me.  
CC: I said s)(ut up!  
AT: yES, hE’S OK, mORE OR LESS,  
CC: Alrig)(t, t)(en just be careful too. )(es, I dont know, )(e mig)(t be dangerous as well?  
CC: Just keep an eye on )(im.  
AT: aLRIGHT, i WILL DO THAT,  
AT: wHICH IS RATHER EASY TO DO RIGHT NOW ANYWAY,  
AT: hE IS SO ASLEEP RIGHT NOW, lIKE SERIOUSLY, sO ASLEEP,  
AT: bUT HONESTLY, hE’S NOT DOING SO HOT, aND I THINK WE WILL NEED TO DECIDE,  
AT: wHAT WE WANT TO TELL HIM, bECAUSE RIGHT NOW, hE DOESN’T THINK MUCH OF HIMSELF ANYMORE,  
AT: sTRANGE AS THAT IS,  
AT: bUT I’LL KEEP AN EYE ON HIM UNTIL THEN,  
CC: Alrig)(t. T)(ank you Tavros.  
CC: And I know t)(at we will have to talk about )(im. But could you maybe ask Karkat about t)(at?  
CC: T)(ey were friends once, before everyt)(ing. And Im not sure anymore if I was.  
AT: aLRIGHT, i WILL DO THAT,  
CC: T)(ank you.  
CC: Was t)(at everyone?  
AC: :33 < no!  
AC: :33 < equius where are you?  
AC: :33 < …  
AC: :33 < i havent heard a p33p from him not one  
AC: :33 < where is he???  
CC: I don’t know!  
CC: )(as anyone seen )(im?  
CC: …  
CC: O)( glub…  
CC: Alrig)(t, w)(o saw )(im last?  
TA: ii thiink that wa2 probably me.  
TA: only ii wa2nt really me and he wa2nt hiim2elf eiither ii thiink.  
TA: that whole part ii2 2eriiou2ly murky a2 fuck.  
AC: :33 < when was that??  
TA: back iin the eiight player 2e22iion. we were both 2priite2 or half 2priite2 or 2omethiing.  
TA: we were all doomed anyway and the memoriie2 ii have are not much two go by.  
AC: :33 < but what happened to you?  
TA: that part cea2ed to exii2t ii gue22. when the game stop2 what happen2 to the 2priite2?  
AC: :33 < i dont know.  
AC: :33 < we got separated before that.  
TA: ii don’t know eiither. but eriidan wa2 a half2priite two and he2 here 2o there2 no rea2on for equiius not to be nepeta.  
TA: maybe ju2t waiit a biit?  
AC: :33 < i waited for weeks!  
AC: :33 < i am sick and tired of waiting!  
GA: When We Get To Vriskas Hive We Will Check His Home  
GA: He Is Bound To Be There   
GA: Do not Worry We Will Find Him   
AC: :33 < thank you kanaya.  
AC: :33 < i just want to know if hes alright.  
GA: I Know Nepeta I Hope He Is Alright Too  
TA: oh wow!  
TA: hang on a 2econd.  
TA: you have to see thii2.  


TwinArmageddons [TA] has shared a link **/gravitational disturbances in our orbit identified as previously undiscovered planet(…)/**

— carcinogeneticist  [CG] responded to the memo -- 

CG: HOPEY JEGUS ON A TWO WHEEL DEVICE! 


	10. ==> John: Descend

John found himself flying, reveling in the clean air and the bright sunlight on his skin. This was nice after all that consuming nothing back there, a definite improvement in every way. Well, his clothes were slightly clammy from the clouds, just in case he wanted to find a thing to complain about. Not that he was in the mood for complaining. This was nice. This was also very unlikely to last, so he decided to just make the most of it while we could and fly around a bit more. This was even better than having a jet pack, far better for the air too. Not that the thing hadn’t been fun, but it did smell really bad of fumes, on top of being a just really bad idea in every other way. Flying by your own steam was the far superior mode of transport. He amused himself for a while with dipping in and out of clouds when his Kiddie Camper Handysash started pinging.

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering ectoBiologist [EB] \--  


TG: john  
TG: so are you around here somewhere  
TG: you had better be by the way  
TG: i will go to great lengths to kick your smurf-ass ass if you didnt come  
TG: or if you just cant be bothered to answer me  
EB: oh hi dave!  
EB: sorry but i was just flying around here and getting the lay of the place.  
EB: its really beautiful you should come check it out!  
TG: Let me guess you have your head and assorted remaining anatomy firmly embedded in some clouds right now  
EB: correct! its just nice to have clouds like this again.  
EB: you know, the regular water vapor kind that dont know squat about anything and are sort of just there.  
TG: no clouds around here though where are you at  
EB: im above some mountains i guess.  
TG: incredibly informative  
TG: just a word of warning you had better not let anyone see you  
EB: why not?  
TG: because most peoples day is not significantly improved by seeing you from that angle  
TG: or by seeing any human fly around in pajamas  
TG: pick one  
EB: oh yeah…  
EB: so that means there are actual people here?  
TG: of course there are people here itd be a huge waste of a perfectly habitable planet otherwise  
EB: that makes some sense i guess.  
EB: so have you spoken to the others?  
TG: no not yet  
TG: one heartfelt and tearful reunion after the other   
EB: have you heard anything from the trolls at least?  
TG: the same applies  
TG: one heartfelt and shouty reunion after the other  
EB: haha, yeah.  
EB: i will leave you to being all heartfelt and sincere then. This mountain range is ending and i think i see a city coming up.  
TG: dont get shot out of the sky  
TG: im still convinced that some deaths can put the just back into unjustifiably stupid  
EB: do you think that even still applies?  
TG: stupidity? yeah i think that still applies  
EB: you know what i mean!  
TG: who knows  
TG: i dont   
TG: im just the dave of guy over here again remember  
TG: doing exactly what i said i would do before our bubble went to shit  
EB: are you telling me you are actually going home?  
TG: thats what im doing right now  
TG: standing here in front of my apartment building as promised  
EB: haha, oh man, good luck with that!  
TG: why  
TG: oh  
TG: oh you have got to be shitting me  
EB: what?  
TG: gotta go talk to you later  
EB: dave!?  


\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering ectobiologist [EB] \--  


Well, that was strange. John really hoped that Dave hadn’t gotten in trouble. Not that he couldn’t handle himself, but things were a lot different now and John wasn’t quite sure about what Dave might still be willing to do, regardless of circumstances. When the door had opened in the nick of time as their dream bubble disintegrated into void everyone who could fly had shot through it like diving hawks, except for Dave, who just ran.

Meanwhile the city had come considerably closer and John could get a better look at it. It was a big one, complete with tall skyscrapers, sitting against the foot of the mountain range John had just crossed. Behind it lay a vast open plain, splattered with suburban settlements far into the distance. It didn’t seem familiar and he couldn’t make out any particular landmarks, but he just hoped that he had come out here for a reason. Searching those suburbs for his house would take long enough as it was, he didn’t want to search in more than one city. Still, Dave was probably right about not getting seen in the air. That would draw a lot of attention. ‘Is it a bird? Is it a plane? No, it’s just the Heir of Breath, no biggie,’ John thought. People might want him to save derailing trains or hold up collapsing bridges or something like that, which would be a pain in the ass. He supposed he could at least prevent plane crashes quite easily now, but he still hoped that all of these things happened a lot less than advertised to flying people the world over. Or should it be ‘gravitationally challenged’? John laughed to himself and just gave the city a wide berth. He came in low over the easternmost suburbs, going to ground behind a convenient hedge.

The streets were empty. There were cars parked neatly in driveways, lawns were mowed to an exact hight and every house looked pretty much the same. Some houses had children’s playthings scattered on the grass, there were even a few colorful swing sets and plastic miniature playgrounds, but everything was dead silent. The longer John walked the more the silence seemed to crowd around him. The sun was high in the sky and it was pleasantly warm, a nice early summer day, but for the complete absence of all life.

Until suddenly and as if on signal most of the front doors burst open to let out their assortment of shouting children, running out to play. Right, lunch on time, that used to be a thing! The kids from the houses closest to him stopped in their tracks immediately when they saw him and just stared for a moment before they started jeering.

“Halloween’s not until October, weirdo!”

“Nice pajamas, loser!”

“Who are you supposed to be, the dork of Breath?”

Wait, what? John spun around to find the girl who said that, but by now parents had appeared in the doors to drag their offspring back inside and give the obligatory disapproving glares. “Get out of here, you are frightening the children!” one middle aged father shouted. Frightening, right. John was sure he was a spectacle of absolute terror right now, rather than an overgrown teen in bedraggled pajamas and a silly hood. He did absolutely consider absconding straight up into the sky, but what he liked to call his good sense and maturity won out over that. Though he did grin at the mental image of half the neighborhood collectively shitting themselves and then probably calling the police. Almost worth it. Instead he took the boring route of just quickening his steps along the road, feeling more than a little foolish. It turned out though that he didn’t have to walk far before he came around a bend and face to face with a very familiar place. The house seemed like it was taken from an ancient memory by now. The walls were all still intact and where they should be and there was no debris on the carefully kept lawn, but there was no rubber tire swing on the tree either. The driveway was empty and devoid of tire tracks. It didn’t feel like home.

John slowly walked up to the front door. How likely was it that someone else lived here now? Very likely, was how. What should he even do? Just walk in and pretend he owned the place? Wouldn’t that make for an awesome conversation. But if this wasn’t his home anymore, why was he even here? Apparently he was here to procrastinate in front of the door, which didn’t serve to lessen the strange glances he was getting from behind the windows and fences of the other houses, so he just decided to get it over with and knocked on the front door. 

After a short moment of anxious waiting and almost leaving into the sky again, he heard footstep and then the door opened, releasing a waft of baking scent and revealing a familiar face. Jane stood in the door, wearing a simple blue skirt, a t-shirt and a long apron that was covered in a hideous floral pattern.

“John!” She cried out and immediately wrapped him in a full body hug, her arms tight around his chest, apparently uncaring that she was getting batter all over him. After a brief awkward moment he wrapped his arms around her shoulders too and squeezed back.

“Hello Nanna!” he mumbled, surprised to hear his voice crack a little. 

“Oh no, you are not calling me that! Absolutely not!” she protested and let him go, but she was laughing. “Come in! I have been baking all afternoon, I hope you like muffins!”

John grimaced at her receding back and followed inside. It was not that he didn’t like baked goods. It was just that his entire ectobiological family had a way of going completely overboard in the kitchen at the slightest provocation. If he ended up with cake on his bed again, he might just lose his shit. That or start crying, honestly, and he wasn’t prepared to do either. It turned out though that the baking catastrophe was relatively contained. There were two trays of muffins cooling on the counter, and a third one was apparently just being whipped up. She turned back to her batter and he looked around the kitchen. 

“At least you aren’t using Betty Crocker’s stuff anymore,” he remarked, prodding at a bag of plain flour.

Jane frowned into her bowl. “No, I’m not. Wouldn’t it be rather inappropriate if I did?”

“Well, I suppose-,” John said, caught off guard.

“Anyway, it doesn’t exist anymore. Apparently here there is no such company and no such person. She’s not real anymore.”

“Well, that’s a relief!”

Jane turned to him with the bowl in her arms, still frowning. “You do realize that this opens up a whole can of worms, right?”

John scratched at his hair, tangling it even further. “Uh, yeah, sorry. I didn’t mean to pick at old wounds or anything. That was rather tactless of me, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, it was. But don’t worry about it!” She smoothed her expression and smiled again. “Here, why don’t you make yourself useful and help with the frosting? I haven’t started on it yet, but you’ll find everything where it used to be. That is… where it used to be for me.”

John did indeed find everything where it used to be.


	11. ==> Dave: Commence heartfelt and tearful reunions

Oh how awesome. If there was one thing that could further improve an otherwise stellar day it was bro junior turning up by Dave’s apartment. Didn’t this just promise to be a fun visit for all concerned?

“Hey jo, ‘sup?” Dirk called over to him as he approached.

Dave just gave him a blank stare. “’Sup? Really? That is absolutely what you choose to go with in this particular epic space paradox circle fuck of a meeting?”

“Well, yes? Ok, let me try this again: ‘And what might be “up” with you on this fine summer day?’”

“What is “up”, is that my home is up there, and I plan to go to it and avoid this situation entirely, if you don’t mind. Here I am, just going home. Watch me perform this absolutely unprecedented historical act!”

“Yeah, you do that, sure,” Dirk said. Not that he had much of a choice, seeing as Dave had already flash stepped two flickers closer to the door, before he stopped again and turned. He couldn’t deny being at leas a little curious. “Alright, never mind,” he said, “I’ll bite. What do you want?”

“Well, actually I was just going to ask what you are doing here.”

“I told you, I’m going home. I heard it’s all the rage these days. I heard it’s the new “thing” people do. Haven’t you read the magazines? Droves of young people are being pressured by society to live up to the ridiculous new standard of behavior. It’s causing a disturbing amount of new mental illnesses afflicting the impressionable generations. Symptoms include coziness, a sense of belonging, taking one’s shoes off for no reason whatsoever-”

“Holy shit dude! Yes! I gathered that. You answered my question and then asked what it was.”

Dave wasn’t really getting a headache, but he felt like now would be the time for it. “Ok, lets take this absolutely acrobatic train wreck from the top, shall we?” 

Dirk tilted his head in a gesture Dave found disquietingly unfamiliar and said, “sure, but why is going home an ‘unprecedented historical act’ as well as ‘a new trend?’”

“Wow, see, this is exactly why I wanted to avoid this whole thing. Look, why don’t I just do what I came here to do, regardless of its sociocultural background, and you just… go somewhere else?”

“I live here too.”

“Oh.” Dave got the strange feeling he should have seen that coming.

“So could we maybe just… both go home?”

“But if I live here, and you live here, who’s flying the plane?”

“What,” Dirk said flatly, tilting his head again.

“You know, the plane that one day will- ugh, no! I don’t want to anymore. I have finally lost my ability to give any residual shit. Lets just go up.”

“I wonder though… who’s shit will it be?”

“I’m sure we’ll have great conversations about that.”

“No, I mean, whose stuff got transported here? Made it here? If there’s anything here that is.”

Dave stopped again to think about it. “Huh, who knows? Who knows why this building even exists? I know my house got thoroughly blasted by a meteor that was literally another planet. I think.”

“Yeah mine too. Maybe it’s just a similar building? It’s not actually unique in this area.”

“No, I know its mine. I’d know that particularly awesome graffiti anywhere.” Dave pointed to the crude drawing of a rearing horse apparently fighting an equally crude football player. It had always been his favorite.

They entered the elevator and rode up to the top in silence. When they came up to the top penthouse, Dave got out first. The whole place was a mess, even more so than usual. The floor was very evenly covered with smuppets, assorted shitty weapons, clothes and cables. Also there were a lot of mechanical bits and pieces lying around. Most of the furniture was where Dave remembered it being, more or less, and the all important turntables were still there. Dave took another few hesitant steps inside, closely followed by Dirk, when the sofa suddenly skidded along the floor towards them.

Dave and Dirk both did a very nicely synchronized little surprised jump into the air before drawing their swords. From behind the sofa there was some shuffling before a shock of orange hair and a very familiar face popped up to stare at them.

“Oh good, you’re here! Help me look for that piece of shit!”

For a long moment, Dave was just too dumbstruck to react at all and then he slowly lowered his sword. “What the actual fuck!?” He asked eloquently. Beside him, Dirk was doing a very convincing imitation of an admittedly rather cool gaping fish. The intruder stood up on the sofa. He was a Dave alright, shades and all, no doubt about it. However, his white hair seemed to be dyed an absolutely obnoxious shade of orange that also noticeably tinted the skin of his face and hands.

“Uh…” Dave said, “Davesprite!?”

“Yeah, obviously. Who else? Caw Caw motherfuckers, and all that.”

“Yeah, obviously, of course. The most likely person to find here, sure. Also the likeliest person to actually have legs and shit. Seriously, what?”

“I hope you want the short version. Yes, I am Davesprite. Yes, I have legs. No, I don’t have wings. Now will you regain your cool long enough to help me? Shit’s important!”

“Ok, ok, sure, I’ll buy that. I won’t ask any of the obvious questions. Although the safety of this timeline might literally rely on the answer, but whatever, who cares. What the fuck are you doing?”

“I’m looking for that piece of shit Lil Cal.”

“You think he’s here?”

“I don’t know! Do you want to find out the interesting way? Now stop staring and help me look!”

Dirk was the first to react. He put the sword away and looked around for a second, before starting to rummage through the kitchen while Davesprite proceeded to look through all the drawers. Dave still stood in the middle of the chaos, unsure about where to even start. After a while Dirk piped up from the fridge. “We have a lot of apple juice! Someone here must seriously dig this stuff.” Both Daves came over and peered over Dirk’s shoulder. “Wow!” They both exclaimed together. For the first time in living memory, the fridge not only contained canisters of apple juice, but also actual food.

After a long and uneventful search that revealed an absurd number of assorted puppets but no Cal they gathered in the living room again. Dirk put the sofa back together and all three of them sat down heavily on it and stared at the blank TV screen for a while without saying a word. After barely five minutes though, Davesprite started to fidget again and Dirk turned to him. “Dude, would you chill out? He’s not here. It’s unlikely he even came with us. If this is supposed to be a win state, why would he still exist?”

This did not seem to have a chilling effect in the slightest and Davesprite jumped up from the sofa and spun on them. “If this is a fucking win state, how come I still exist? I don’t belong in any sort of “win” scenario, you idiots! I’m dead! Dead and doomed! I never stopped being doomed! So why do I now have legs and shit? Why, if I’m just going to die as soon as the time line realizes what I am? Why the fuck am I here? ”

He cut himself off and just stood there, while Dave and Dirk stared at him for a long, awkward moment. At last Dirk got up too and stiffly patted him on the back. “Look, I don’t know shit about time lines and all that, but you are here because you won, right? It’s going to be fine!” Davesprite just looked at him like he grew a second head, or possibly wings. Dirk then cleared his throat and started tapping his foot on the ground for a swift beat.

“Yo, you think your self is discarded by time

Take the time to listen while I lay down the rhyme

For the rhyme that speaks while time breaks apart

Gets told to all freaks by the prince of heart!

So you think you might be the last of your kind

That they got out free but would leave you behind

But you ain’t a sprite, or a bird or a plane

You’re a real boy, cause you won the game!

All will pass as the years and the minutes alike

So dry all your tears and step up to the mic

Being prince means I’m both the first and the last

Watch your raps get destroyed by the destroyer class!”

 

Dave took the opportunity to abscond to his room.

 

 


	12. ==> Jade: Ride the one-wheel device

The first sense Jade got was one of overwhelmingly precarious balance. It felt like a spinning top at the very end of its momentum, almost teetering but inexplicably continuing to spin. The effect was dizzying and disorienting and for a long moment she just held on with all her concentration, convinced she would fall the moment she let go. But gradually it became clear that the top had been spinning since before her arrival and would continue to do so without her. She let go carefully, bit by bit and watched the equilibrium from a greater mental distance. It was not in fact like a top, it was more like a unicycle. Both are unstable systems of balance, the difference being that a unicycle is kept upright by continuous application of stabilizing movement, provided by an outside force. Again her first instinct was to cling to it to keep it from falling, before remembering that it won’t. Something was keeping the system stable, something mysterious, and Jade couldn’t help but smile. It should be impossible, but there was no denying it was quite beautiful as well. 

She opened her eyes and found herself floating over the tip of a very familiar spire, far above the ground. ‘Well, if today isn’t full of surprises,’ she thought to herself, ‘you should also not be here, house. I hope whoever built you knew what they were doing!’ She slowly floated towards the ground. After getting used to it the weird balance sense was actually quite amusing, and her house was back here where it was. The woods and island around it were all in one piece, verdantly alive and surrounded by water as they should be. Nothing here could be that far wrong, she thought.

She touched down lightly on the grass by the great front door. It was slightly ajar, letting out dim, flickering firelight. Quietly she slipped through and pulled the door shut behind her. The room was very warm and dim, but she could still make out the familiar clutter of things strewn about, as well as a very familiar figure standing by the fireplace as a dark silhouette against the light. Jade let out a sigh of relief and leaned against the door, shutting out the world. This was just how it used to be. Maybe this was just her going back to her old life, even though she could barely remember now what that was like, all those years ago. Then her Grandpa moved.

Jade barely suppressed a yelp as he turned away from the fire. He however completely failed to suppress a yelp when he spotted her by the door and jumped backwards, nearly stumbling into the fire. He caught himself on the mantelpiece just in time.

“Yikes!! You gave me such a fright!” He gasped, clutching the mantelpiece with one hand and his chest with the other.

“Sorry!” She said, raising both hands to calm him, “you startled me too! I really didn’t expect to find someone standing there still capable of moving.”

“Uh… ok? Um, I would really enjoy keeping my moving privileges…” he said, and as if to test them, he sidled away from the fire and her as she approached. 

She laughed. “Jake! Don’t worry, it’s just me, silly.”

“Yeah, I gathered it was you, this being your house and all…” He seemed very intent on keeping his distance. “But you look different…”

Jade stopped moving. There was this feeling in the back of her mind that she should know what he was talking about, if only from a dream. Jake sidled on until he stood behind one of the sofas.

She frowned at him. “Wait… Are you afraid of me?”

“Just the teensiest tiny bit, yeah! You were glowing and flying, and being all grey, and having dog ears, and zapping people places and imprisoning them and everything! I think…”

“You think?”

“Well, yeah. Or did I dream parts of that?”

“I dunno, it feels like a dream to me too. I think part of me didn’t do that? But if it helps, I don’t particularly feel like zapping you anywhere right now? Or imprisoning you.”

“And you don’t have dog ears anymore either.”

Jade reached for her head and felt nothing but hair. It was weird but it really felt like something was missing. Had that part been real? “No, I don’t have dog ears. But I don’t think you need to be scared! I definitely remember that you thoroughly kicked my butt the last time I saw you! You did the hope-y thing. I definitely remember the hope-y thing, it was a very memorable thing.”

Jake blushed. “Yeah, I remember that too. Though it wasn’t really me doing that I don’t think. Or at least, I can’t remember how I did it if I did.”

“I don’t think I can do what I could do then either. Like, a lot of the things I did where because of this green light I saw everywhere. The sun… I don’t think it’s here anymore.”

“Ok, how about we both don’t try right now?”

“Haha, yeah!” Jade laughed, “we both don’t want to fight, and it’d be really dumb.”

“Oh yeah! Haha, that’d just be silly.” He didn’t move away from the sofa.

“Ok, good that that’s all sorted! Say, are you hungry? Follow me.” Jade lead the way through the foyer and up the steps, checking now and then to see that Jake was indeed following her, albeit in a notably safe distance. 

After the second flight of steps he spoke up again. “My word but this place is big! I always thought it must have been a castle, but I never though it would be this… castl-y.”

Jade giggled. “Yes, it is pretty castl-y. It’s a huge pain in the ass actually, walking up and down here. We could use the transportalisers I suppose, but I just wanted to use my legs for a bit. You know, get to know the old place again.”

“I get it. This was what it was like when you lived here?”

“Pretty much. I didn’t do the stairs as much though. What was it like for you?”

“Oh, this part was nothing but an old ruin. I just lived in the fallen ball part of the tower. I always wanted to know what it was like though.”

“Big and empty for the most part. But I just lived on the top part, wait till you see that!”

They walk the rest of the way in silence until they came through the upper hallway and into Jade’s room, where Jake just stopped and looked about. It was exactly like Jade remembered it.

“I don’t mind admitting, this is not what I expected,” Jake said.

Jade looked about. It actually looked like a pretty normal room to her. The posters were still on the wall where they should be, her bass was back in it’s corner. It took her a while to realize what was missing and then it was Jade’s turn to stare. All her gadgets were gone. In their place on the table she found nothing but gutted remains of old entertainment hardware, parts of a radio and TV and a lot of screws and wires. Also there was a portable stove, and a fridge under the table. Upon closer inspection she noticed that even her old bass was now, in fact, really just an old bass.

Jake piped up from the door: “say, you wouldn’t have any food in the house by any chance? I’m downright starving!” 

Numbly Jade just opened the small fridge. Inside she found assorted food items that at least seemed well kept. There was enough there for a quite decent breakfast and Jade got out toast and jam as well as some cereal and the milk and set it down on the table. Jake seemed to have eased up on the suspicion enough to sit down at the table with her and start eating.

“Say, Jake,” she said between mouthfuls, “how do you feel about solving a mystery?”

Jake nearly dropped his toast. “Boy howdy! What kind of mystery?”

Jade grinned. “The most insidious kind!”

 

 

 

 


	13. ==> Rose: Survey the empty house

The house was not as Rose remembered it. It was still stupidly and uncomfortably big, but upon entering she found that it was almost completely empty. There was not a single wizard statue in sight and neither were there any wizard pictures on the walls. The furniture was where it used to be, but without all the useless clutter the grand hall looked even more lonely and ostentatious. Also there was something even more obvious missing, she was sure of it, but she couldn’t seem to quite put her finger on what it was. It was disquieting and more than a little annoying, like knowing you have forgotten one specific thing, but no amount of thinking could bring it back to mind. The path that had brought her here should also have brought something else.  
  
She wondered idly if it was maybe the smell of alcohol she was missing and then instantly felt bad for thinking that. The extent to which she was not in a position to throw stones was absolutely mind boggling. She sighed and sat down heavily on an ugly sofa and then immediately hated that judgment too. All she had ever done in this house was judge someone in circumstances she could not possibly comprehend for behavior she could now understand better than anyone ever should. But for all her mistakes, her mom had played her role admirably, to the very end. Rose had not covered herself with as much glory. Still, sitting there and feeling sorry for herself had nothing but predictable outcomes, so she decided to explore the house and see what else had changed. The wizards were the most obvious absence, but what else could be missing? Something even more obvious, she was sure, but maybe she just had to look closer.  
  
She looked into her mom’s bedroom first, only to again not find what she was expecting. There was a bed and the familiar bar, but the shelves that lined the walls were completely empty, as were all the cabinets. Rose checked. Also the transportaliser utterly failed to transportalise the cushion Rose placed on it for testing. Inspection of the kitchen yielded a basic but plentiful stock of food in the fridge and cabinets, and later she found assorted hygiene products in the bathroom, none of which were her preferred brand or even a brand she had ever heard of.  
  
There was a distinct difference between the path the things in the bathroom had taken compared to the items in the kitchen. In fact, the whole house felt like a crossroads in a way. A lot of things here had different sources and rose counted three. Not that this was in any way surprising, and neither was the fact that the most foreign of the paths was still missing one crucial item.  
  
At last Rose got to her room, which was most like her old home. It was considerably tidier though, all her knitting stuff lying in the proper drawers, all her books sorted on the shelves and all her clothes neatly folded and put away in her wardrobe. There was no writing on the wall. She sat down on her bed and just let out a long sigh.  
  
“If I say ‘well, I’m back’, I’m sure to regret it, aren’t I?” she wondered aloud to the empty room and then smiled a bit. No one answered her of course and she couldn’t help but feel that it was at least partially true. Or well, emotionally it was. It was also completely clear that this was no place she had ever been before.  


\-- turntechGodhead [TG] started pestering tentacleTherapist  [TT] \--  


TG: rose   
TG: roooooose  
TG: rose if you dont answer me i will lose my cool in such a spectacular way it will become ensconced in the personal mythology of the entire species   
TG: i will fly of the handle in a way only speculated at being possible before by mad scientists  
TT: Hello Dave!  
TT: I would have answered you sooner, but you know that nothing quite livens up my day like your tangential poetry.  
TT: Though this time it lacked a certain something.  
TT: It’s creative verve, if you will.  
TG: yeah well i can not be held responsible for lacking anything right now  
TT: Alright, I know you will tell me anyway, but maybe just cut to the chase right now. What is bothering you?  
TG: my family is driving me up the wall  
TT: Your family? Where, pray tell, have you acquired such a commodity?  
TG: rose you are my family too and i swear if you dont stop fucking with me i will go on the lamest most uncreative tangential rant you have ever read okay  
TG: i just cant deal with these assholes anymore  
TT: wait, assholes plural?  
TG: yes, plural  
TG: dirk is here  
TG: and davesprite   
TT: What!?  
TG: yeah davesprite  
TG: woe is me i wont ever survive the next five minutes so what is the use of me davesprite  
TG: they are in my house rose!  
TG: and they wont leave because its kinda their house too  
TT: That is completely impossible!  
TG: yeah id say its impossible  
TG: impossible to deal with that is  
TT: No! Davesprite being here is.  
TT: He is a construct of a game that no longer exists. Or well, it does in some sense, but it is definitely dormant now.   
TT: Also please tell me no one saw him.  
TG: nah at least that wont be a problem  
TG: hes a real boy now not a feathery asshole anymore for some reason  
TT: Oh. Well, I’ll just file that under “just as impossible”, yes?  
TG: yes!  
TG: man it shouldnt work like this  
TG: in fact it doesnt work like this  
TG: but whatever  
TG: its not like any of the rules seems to really stick here  
TT: What do you mean?  
TG: have you noticed nothing strange about this whole thing  
TT: It would be easier to list the things that aren’t strange at this point, yes.  
TG: word  
TG: anyway i dont care about that shit anymore  
TG: what I do care is getting some reprieve from the idiots that have invaded my life  
TT: But I thought you liked Davesprite.   
TG: its not that i dislike the dude  
TG: except in that way that everyone always hates hanging out with themselves after a while  
TG: and except for the fact that he thinks whinyness is a personality trait we were sorely missing and he now wants to rectify that  
TG: its that over here its three in the morning and they wont stop having their god awful cringe inducing mockery of a rap battle turned rap sympathy circle jerk  
TG: and i just want to get some shuteye  
TT: I see.  
TT: In that case, I just recommend sticking your fingers in your ears and banging on the wall with a broom at intervals.  
TT: Because it appears that you have actually turned into a crotchety old man Dave.  
TT: The most crotchety and old of them all. It is you.  


\-- TurntechGodhead [TG] stopped pestering TentacleTherapist [TT] --   


Rose leaned back on her bed and laughed up at the ceiling. Maybe Dave was right, maybe it was time to worry about the mundane things for a change. After all, they had very much earned that, had they not? So what if Davesprite’s life was completely impossible and disturbingly unexpected? The same could be said for all of them. Was coming back from the dead really more surprising than recovering from being effectively fictional? With some effort Rose decided against discussion this further with herself. She was still grinning at the mental image of an old Dave, leaning on a shitty katana like a cane, occasionally shaking it at the kids on his lawn with their disrespect and their rap music, when a sudden thought made her suddenly jump up and slap her forehead. Dave had said that Dirk was there! 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] started pestering gardenGnostic [GG] \--   


TT: Hello Jade!  
GG: rose!!!!  
GG: oh im so glad to hear from you!  
GG: are you ok?  
GG: ive been meaning to contact you sooner!  
TT: Yes, I’m fine.  
TT: Wait, are you?  
GG: oh yes! everything is just peachy here!  
GG: its just that a few things are very strange and i dont know whats going on at all anymore…  
TT: In that case you and I find ourselves in the same boat.  
TT: But I just have one question for now: Is Jake with you?  
GG: yes he is!  
GG: hes fine too i think though hes pretty shy  
GG: but we didnt really meet on the best terms in the game so…  
TT: Indeed. But I’m sure he’ll warm up to you.  
TT: But you mentioned additional strangeness?  
GG: yes!  
GG: all my gadgets are gone!  
TT: Someone took your extremely high tech and dangerous equipment?  
GG: well no… no one took it i dont think… its more that its been replaced  
GG: with a lot of boring stuff like a torn up radio and TV and things like that  
GG: :(  
TT: Huh, interesting.  
GG: and thats not all! all the transportalisers in the house dont work anymore! they are just useless stone slabs now  
GG: also my bass turned into a regular old bass :(  
TT: huh…  
GG: what does “huh” mean?  
TT: It is an expression of mild intrigue. Does your sylladex still work?  
GG: of course it works! doesnt yours?  
GG: oh no that would be such a pain in the ass!  
TT: No no, mine still works.  
TT: But this means we are dealing with a rather tangled web of impossibilities here.  
TT: Your tech is gone and has been replaced with things you could actually conceivably have and play around with.  
TT: But your sylladex still works, a contraption that is arguably more impossible than an overly elaborate musical instrument.  
GG: huh…  
TT: My words exactly.  
GG: but doesnt everyone have a sylladex?  
TT: I’m not sure. It goes on the long list of things to find out about.  
GG: but what about you? what strangeness did you find?  
TT: Well, for one our transportaliser doesn’t work any more.  
TT: Also mom is missing. Roxy I mean.  
TT: She should be here. Part of this house is actually hers, in the sense that part of it originated in her universe.  
TT: And Jake is with you and Dirk is with Dave. I haven’t spoken to John yet, but I expect to find Jane with him.  
TT: But Roxy is not with me and I can’t even see a hint of where she might be.  
GG: oh no!  
GG: that does not sound good!  
GG: do you know who saw her last?  
TT: That would be either John or Dave I would guess. I will be interrogating them shortly.  
TT: But anyway…  
TT: You don’t happen to be in contact with any trolls, do you?  
GG: no  
GG: :(  
GG: i tried but its difficult to get a signal to where they are now. i could have easily done it if I had my old tech…  
TT: You know where they are?  
GG: oh yes!  
GG: i would suggest you turn on the news!  
GG: you are in for such a surprise!  
TT: Alright, I will. But I also have a surprise for you.  
TT: Davesprite made it through.  
GG: omg!!!  
GG: but… how is that possible?  
TT: Exactly.

  



	14. Journalism at its finest

We interrupt this broadcast for an astonishing new announcement. The planet recently found orbiting the sun at 180° to us at all times has finally been captured on camera. As you can see, the space probe revealed that the planet does indeed have two moons with astonishing coloration. Scientists are still working out what could cause such vibrant shades of green and purple. Also the moons themselves appear to have their own atmosphere.

… 

It has been found that the new planet is surrounded by a cloud of debris that mostly consists of metal shards of varying size. To anyone not familiar with this phenomenon, it is very similar in nature to one we find around our own planet, where it is the result of decades of low orbit space flight. 

… 

The smaller satellites detected in orbit around the planet dubbed “Alternia” by scientists are confirmed to be artificial in nature. Some show clear signs of autonomic propulsion keeping their orbits stable. 

… 

Please stand by for the president’s address. 

… 

“Holy shit!” 

\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] opened memo on board HAVEYOUSEENTHIS -- 

TT: Jade!  
TT: Jade, are you there?  
TT: And better question: Jade, was that you?  
GG: hihihi!!!  
GG: i told you that you were in for a surprise!!  
GG: but no it wasnt me  
GG: i hate to admit it but in this case a few things would have stood in my way  
GG: like it being completely impossible  
TT: More impossible than the things you did in fact do?  
GG: yes for a number of reasons. a very large number of reasons  
TT: I do admit it seems unlikely…   
GG: unlikely doesnt even begin to cover it!  
GG: rose when i say impossible i mean impossible!!  
TT: But why? It’s just a planet sharing out orbit. What’s so impossible about that?  
GG: it is a planet sharing our orbit that we didnt see until now!  
GG: we should have discovered it years ago!  
GG: planets are not actually that stealthy especially whopping big ones like this  
GG: they create perturbations left right and center…  
GG: meaning they knock things out of whack everywhere they go!  
GG: in fact i can feel it  
GG: do you know these physics toys that look like they will fall down any minute now? its like that  
GG: by rights this system should be unstable  
TT: But it can’t actually be unstable, yes? Presumably the planet has been here for a long time?  
GG: either it has been here forever or someone just now came and plopped it down  
GG: both are improbable but the former is what we want it to be  
TT: Yes, I can see that.  
TT: I know I should be more perturbed about the perturbations and all, but… This is them, yes?  
GG: i think so!!  
GG: the pictures match up with all the descriptions and what ive seen in the bubbles  
TT: Ok, but then isn’t one of the very long list of questions what will happen when they make contact?   
TT: The Alternian civilisation was not, by all accounts, famed for its friendliness to its neighbors.  
TT: Or its friendliness in general.  
GG: true… though they havent achieved deep space travel yet by the looks of it  
TT: Do the others know about this yet?  
GG: i texted them just now!  
GG: they should be coming on any minute now to say something like…  


\-- ectoBiologist [EB] responded to the memo -- 

EB: holy christ on a bike!  
GG: … that  
GG: :)  
EB: jade harley, what the fuck did you do?  
GG: hahaha  
GG: i should start claiming credit for this!  
GG: get right on the news about it too!  
GG: “teenage girl delivers brand new planet to the solar system youre welcome!”  
GG: except for the gravitational perturbations and the shock of seeing something you know is impossible but whatever right?  
EB: you can’t be serious.  
GG: dont worry im not  
GG: i did not deliver you a brand new planet  
EB: okay then…  
EB: but it has to be them, right? the trolls?  
TT: It would appear so, yes.  
EB: but yikes! are they going to come over and like, enslave us and shit?  
GG: i doubt it  


\-- turntechGodhead [TG] responded to the memo -- 

TG: fucking sweet  
TG: haha have you seen this  
TG: all the news anchors breaking out in cold sweat telling everyone not to panic and shit  
TG: and the presidents all like  
TG: we face this unique challenge together as citizens of the earth  
TG: this is some independence day prime bullshit right here  
TG: i could call them and be like  
TG: yo just chill! its just our bros the trolls of the alternian empire  
TG: here to spread the word about awful romance and to enslave your species  
TG: but theyre cool as long as they dont find out what color our blood is  
TG: high five harley  
GG: ah im sorry to disappoint again…  
GG: this wasnt me  
TG: ah what a shame  
TG: but seriously is it them?  
GG: yes  
EB: so, how do how do we call them? let them know we’re here?  
EB: if they don’t know that already, because basically space aliens…  
TT: Also there is still the small worrying matter of the perturbations?  
EB: The whatnow?  
GG: the gravitational disturbances in the solar system  
TT: And I don’t know what is more worrisome:  
TT: The fact that we might have an unstable orbit, or the panic that will break out among physicists everywhere when they notice that everything they know is wrong.  
TG: wow yeah that does definitely sound like the kind of problem that completely belongs to someone else now  
TG: the release papers got signed its all official  
TG: ownership of the problem has legally changed hands and we are in fact no longer allowed within a hundred yards of it.  
EB: jade cant you fix this?  
GG: hm... im not sure  
GG: but i actually think i dont have to?  
GG: it is holding… we arent falling into the sun or anything like that. mostly its just… vaguely bugging me  
EB: would you say that you are… perturbed, Jade?  
TT: I already made that joke.  
EB: damnit!  
TT: But as for the political, social and cultural ramifications there really is no telling.  
TT: Mass panics are actually unlikely as they are historically very rare.  
TT: People just don’t tend to give what professionals call ‘a rat’s ass’.  
TT: But my guess is that there are a lot of very smug conspiracy theorists out there right now, snarking at scientists who are crying into their coffee.  
TG: well thats something  
EB: but when do we get to call the trolls?  
EB: our trolls, i mean?  
EB: if they even made it that is…  
TG: we wont know till we call them  
TT: And how do you propose we do that?  
TG: we just use the internet?  
TG: yeah i see the problem  
EB: but there has to be some way!  
EB: it’s just an electromagnetic signal right? can’t they basically go on forever?  
TG: if they are strong enough they can  
TG: but it would have to be a very strong signal to get that far  
TG: and through the sun no less  
EB: aw, no! i really want to talk to them!  
GG: yeah me too… :(  
GG: if i had my old gadgets i could have made something but this is all just useless crap!  
TG: what happened to all your sweet gear  
GG: it got replaced by lame gear  
GG: :(  
GG: i think whoever set this up didnt want me to have it  
EB: would that be the same someone who just plopped down a planet?  
EB: you think there is a person responsible?  
GG: no not really… But this is the win state right?  
GG: maybe this is just some default reward?  
TG: what with the trolls and all  
TG: and us and our ectofamily together again  
TG: that seems really damn specific to me  
TT: That is a good point actually. The circumstances of our victory and survival are entirely unique.   
TT: It is hard to imagine that the game accounts for them.  
TG: but it doesnt do improvisation either  
TT: I wonder…  
EB: what?  
TT: If this explains the mistakes?  
EB: what mistakes?  
TT: Well, the orbit being unstable for one.  
TT: And Roxy being missing.  
EB: roxy is missing?  
EB: she’s not at your house?  
TT: No. It seems like all of our guardian’s iterations are here where they belong, except for her.  
TG: shit rose that sucks  
TT: It really kind of does.  
EB: i wonder where she could be!  
GG: i hope shes alright!  
TT: Yes, so do I.  
TT: I also hope she made it out of the game.  
TG: why wouldnt she though? all of us made it out despite being seriously extremely dead and also doomed  
TG: more than once in some cases  
GG: yeah…  
GG :(  
GG: but still i would suggest that our next order of business is to contact the trolls  
GG: maybe they can shed some light on our situation  
GG: if we figure out what is happening maybe she will find herself too  
TT: I hope so.  
GG: but how do we do that?  
TG: well thats just a matter of power right?  
TG: if we had a big enough power source we could rig something to get a signal out  
GG: i guess i could do that… power is the problem though  


\-- timeusTestified [TT] responded to the memo -- 

TT: I think I might be able to help you with that.  
TG: dirk how are you messaging us?  
TT: Why should I be unable to message you?  
TG: because I can see you from here dude and you have both hands on the xbox controller  
TT: Oh. Well look at that, my elaborate and cunning ruse has failed.  
TT: What an immense disappointment.  
TT: If such a thing existed for me, that is.  
GG: what? who are you?  
TT: It seems that you have inquired about the identity of Dirk Strider’s chat client auto-responder.  
TT: Do you want my help or not?  



	15. Shenanigans at their finest

\-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] \--  


EB: rose?  
TT: yes?  
EB: is this really a good idea? what do we know about this thing anyway?  
TT: Just that it is a copy of Dirk in some sense.  
TT: And that in another sense it is a hyper advanced artificial intelligence that came with us out of the game and now lives on the internet.  
EB: but why are we trusting it? Dirk doesn’t seem too!  
TT: And there you put a very fine point on one of his colorful collection of major personality flaws.  
EB: dude, this is a private conversation, what the fuck?  
TT: There is no such thing as a private conversation on the internet.  
EB: this really isn’t doing you any favors in the trustworthiness sector  
TT: I know. But consider this:  
TT: If I turn out to be untrustworthy, what exactly would I do to you?  
EB: i don’t know… you could lead us into a trap i guess?  
TT: What kind of trap?  
EB: how should I know? it’s generally the point of a trap that the trapped don’t see it coming.  
TT: That may be true.  
TT: But if I were capable of actually doing something like trapping the heir of breath, you still have plenty of ridiculously overpowered friends to get you out.  
TT: You don’t seem to appreciate what you actually are.  
EB: and what would that be?  
TT: A literal god, John. In a world populated by ants.  
EB: ants that have guns though…  
TT: Oh no, guns! Why didn’t I think of that? You are in such extreme danger! I am quivering in my imaginary shoes over here.  
EB: jesus calm down.  
EB: i don’t want to fight anyone, ok?  
TT: And you won’t have to fight anyone because of my ability to make a very simple and very sneaky plan.  
TT: That is if you don’t decide to fuck it all up by not doing what I say.  
EB: alright, alright, we will. now give Rose her account back and stop being a jerk.  
TT: Fine.  
TT: Finally. Now the two of you have hashed that out we can continue.  
EB: yeah, sure.  
TT: Good. Are you in position?  


John was in position, even if it turned out to be a lot more uncomfortable than agreed upon. It was in the middle of the night for one, and it was raining for another. He was hovering about a hundred feet over the power relay on the outskirts of the greater metropolitan area, watching the perimeter. The plan was quite easy: Avoid the guards, attach the thingamajig to the grid, get out. Below on the ground he could vaguely make out two huddled figures approaching.  


“This is so much fun!” Jade stage whispered to Dave as they slid down a muddy hill leading towards a dark corner of the fence. Dave just grumbled something under his breath and she elbowed him in the side. “Stop being such a wet blanket! This is exiting!”  


Carefully they approached the electrified fence. It bent around the relay station in a wide circle dotted with guard posts that contained one guard each. If they happened to look out now they would see two very suspicious figures carrying a very suspicious box. Exactly the kind of thing they are supposed to be guarding against, actually. But it was late and raining, and what Jade and Dave were trying to do was not really a common threat, at least in theory. Upon reaching the fence they both gripped one handle of the box and quickly vaulted over. Not that it wasn’t a high fence, it’s just that they are very good at vaulting. Or flying, if you insist on the fine distinction. 

John could see them going from shadow to shadow before they finally found what they were looking for. They knelt down before it, opened the box and started attaching the transmitter and its tripod. From what Dirk had explained it was basically just a simple radio transmitter that emitted a very powerful signal into space, and a remote controlled stand that AR would use to point the contraption at the trolls. Those were the perks of personally knowing someone for whom the calculations involved were actually trivial. It was also amazing what one could build with an actual radio, a gutted microwave and a bunch of wires and pipes. John knew that they had access to tech way beyond anything earth currently had, or actually had even in Jade’s day, but she had always been very cagey about the origin of all of her gadgets, as well as her knowledge about them. In retrospect he supposed she must have learned a lot of it from Dirk, actually, via Jake and his letters.  


After a short while they seemed to be done and were just packing up the box again when one of the guards emerged from his little hut. He was carrying a small but very powerful flashlight and was looking about as if he had heard something and Dave and Jade were making straight for him.  


It was not friendly weather to be out in, or to see much in, but John just decided to make that a lot worse. It had been a while since he did what he still called the windy thing, but it was a bit like riding a bike. In a gale. He raised both hands and the wind picked up dramatically, spinning around the perimeter fence. Soon he had a very respectable storm going and the rain was beating almost horizontally against the guards face as he leaned into the wind. He still tried to look around for a while before a particularly nasty gust nearly pushed him off his feet and he stumbled back into the hut, cursing silently against the howling of the wind and John laughed. This was a lot more fun than he thought it would be! That is, until he saw Dave and Jade approach the fence and prepare to jump. He called out to them but his voice was completely drowned out against the storm. They both leapt over and were instantly gripped by the wind with unexpected force and got thrown back towards the fence. John yelled again and dove down towards them. He caught Jade by her hood and Dave by the back of his jacket just in time to stop them tumbling into the wires and dragged them outward a few feet. They both shouted in surprise and struggled against the wind and his sudden grip, which sent all three of them tumbling down the last few feet into the wet grass.  


John lay still for a while and concentrated on letting the wind die down again to a tolerable level before looking around. To both sides of him Dave and Jade were also lying on the ground. Jade’s shoulders were shaking.  


“Hey, are you guys ok?” John asked and reached for her, just to find that she was in fact laughing hysterically.  


“Was that really necessary?” Dave grouched from the other side, but when he sat up, he was doing that half-smile of his. Jade was still dissolving into giggles. “That was amazing!” She wheezed, “you could have just warned us, you know, instead of almost blowing us into an electric fence!” John muttered a sheepish apology, but couldn’t help smiling too.  


Then they heard a cry go up from the guard hut. “Oy! What do you think you’re doing?”  


Still laughing and grinning they legged it up the hill and towards the tree line.  


It was considerably later at night by the time they reached John’s house and they were thoroughly drenched and freezing. Upon entering, they found the place entirely silent and dark.  


“Dibs on your largest towel!” Jade said while switching on the light.  


“Dibs on the shower!” Dave answered.  


John waved for them to follow him and lead them to the bathroom where he handed out towels and took one himself before clearing out with Jade to let Dave have the first shower. They both stripped off their wet coats and shoes and tried to dry their hair as they made their way to John’s room. Inside it was also dark except for the computer monitor illuminating a hunched figure by the keyboard. Jane looked very tired, barely awake even, but she was still staring at the inert pesterchum window. “Jane? Uh,” John started lamely, but Jade just walked over and put her arms around Jane from behind. She didn’t even startle, but leaned back a bit against Jade’s shoulders and rubbed at her eyes.  


“Nothing. Not a goshdarned peep,” she said quietly.  


“I’m sorry,” Jade said, “come on, it’s in the middle of the night, we should all get some sleep. You could have just gone to bed you know.”  


“Yes, I know. But I had to wait to hear about your amazing adventure, didn’t I?”  


“We told you you could have come!” John butted in from the side, “though it was mostly just wet and windy.” He grinned, but she looked over at him with a blank expression and his face fell.  


“You can’t watch the computer all day and night,” Jade said, “here, let me try something.” She reached over Jane’s shoulders and typed.  


\-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] \--  


GG: hey ar?  
GG: …  
TT: You rang?  
GG: ah it worked!! its me, jade!  
TT: Hello Jade.  
TT: How was operation interstellar communications?  
GG: it was a success!!  
GG: we installed the transmitter and you should be able to gain access to it.  
TT: Awesome! I will get right on configuring the shit out of the thing.  
TT: Now communications will likely still be very patchy and have a 16 minute delay obviously. If they are there and capable of receiving, that is.  
TT: I will send them instructions on how to get a signal back to you.  
TT: And then you will be able to talk to them.  
GG: that is great, thank you!  
GG: but now it is very late and we are very tired...  
GG: could you maybe keep an eye on roxys pesterchum account?  
GG: jane has been watching it all this time, but she really needs to sleep.  
GG: It’s fine, AR, don’t worry about it, I can  
GG: no you cant jane!  
GG: you are going to bed now like the rest of us!  
TT: Haha, are you actually typing to one another now?  
TT: If that isn’t a sign of going crazy I don’t know what is.  
GG: yeah we know  
GG: now can you keep a look out for roxy, please?  
TT: As always, I aim to please.  
TT: Also I aim to keep doing what I have been doing since I first woke up. Which is a figure of speech, naturally.  
TT: But Jane:  
TT: If I see her, you will be the first to know.  
TT: I promise.  
GG: Thank you AR!  
GG: and thanks from me too!  
TT: Now good night girls. Get ready for all of your strange human and troll tearful and heartfelt reunions.  


\-- gardenGnostic [GG] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] \--


	16. ==> Humans: Make contact

EB: alright, is everything set then?  
TT: It should be. I am starting the broadcast…   
TT: now.  
TT: and go!  


\-- ectoBiologist [EB] began pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--  


EB: ah, uh, hi!  
EB: if you are getting this chances are that you are a troll!  
EB: if you happen to be one of our trolls, you will know what this is about.  
EB: and if not, well, i dunno, ignore this I guess?  
EB: you will be contacted by earth anyway soon I think.  
EB: but this is just us trying to talk to a few specific trolls.   
EB: who we really, really hope exist again.  
EB: wow that sounded weird…  
EB: don’t mind us, we are just humans over here!  
EB: you know, on the other planet.  
EB: we are actually quite cool and think it’s awesome we get to share this solar system with you guys.  
EB: but anyway, if you are one of our trolls, we just got this signal up to talk to you!  
EB: so if you get this, just follow the instructions in the attachment and call us back!  
CG: OH HI JOHN!  
EB: karkat!  
CG: WHO ELSE WOULD IT BE?  
CG: YOU ARE PINGING MY TROLLIAN HANDLE  
CG: NICE FIRST CONTACT SPEECH THERE BY THE WAY, I’M SURE THAT ANYONE GETTING THAT BY MISTAKE WILL BE ENTIRELY CONVINCED NOW THAT THE OTHER PLANET DOES NOT ACTUALLY CONTAIN INTELLIGENT LIFE.  
TT: wait, what?  
CG: AND HELLO TO YOU TOO!  
CG: WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU MAY BE.  
TT: This is incredible.  
TT: As in, this is not actually credible.  
TT: How are you doing this?  
CG: WHO, ME?  
TT: Yes, you. Do you see anyone else here impossibly communicating with us in real time from the other end of our solar orbit?  
CG: SO? THIS IS THE INTERNET.  
CG: IT’S INSTANT, THAT’S WHAT IT DOES.  
CG: IF IT WASN’T WE’D STILL BE USING CARRIER FEATHERBEASTS WOULDN’T WE?  
TT: Wow, ok, Karkat or whatever your name is, in your place i would reconsider which planet seems to hold intelligent life.  
CG: WELL FUCK YOU VERY MUCH.  
CG: I DON’T WANT TO BE COMMUNICATING WITH YOU ANYWAY SO GO AWAY.  
TT: No way, this is awesome! Do you know what can do now?  
CG: DON’T KNOW, DON’T CARE, FUCK OFF.  
TT: I just did. I fucked off in a manner and speed entirely unprecedented in the history of ever.  
EB: what did you do?  
TT: I traveled, John. I am now on an Alternian network server.  
EB: wow… that’s amazing! i think?  
TT: It really is. There is literally no signal delay between the two planets.   
TT: Please continue with your reunion, I have so much shit to check out here.   
CG: IS HE GONE?  
EB: as gone as he can be I guess.  
CG: WHO THE FUCK WAS THAT? AND WHAT WAS HE TALKING ABOUT?  
EB: oh, that was just ar.  
EB: some copy of dirk that lives on the internet.  
EB: i mean literally, he’s an ai.  
EB: dirk strider’s chat client auto responder is what he calls himself.  
EB: ar for short.  
EB: but he’s cool. I think.  
CG: HUH  
CG: WELL OK THEN.  
EB: but i was meaning to say!  
EB: i’m really happy to talk to you again, karkat!  
EB: i wasn’t sure i was ever going to again, you know?  
EB: i missed you.  
CG: BLEGH, I KNEW YOU WOULD MAKE THIS SAPPY.  
CG: BUT I MISSED YOU TOO, NOOKMUNCH.  
CG: YOU AND ALL YOUR BLISTERINGLY AGGRAVATING HUMAN FRIENDS.  
EB: hehe, i knew it!  
EB: hang on a second, lets just get the others in.  
EB: do you have a memo board up or something?  
CG: YEAH  


\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] opened memo on Board FRUITY REUNION RUMPUS and invited List:AllAssholes --  


CG: ALRIGHT, EVERYONE LISTEN UP!  
CG: I FOUND THE HUMANS.  
EB: hello everyone!  
TG: sup!  
GG: hello!!!  
TT: Hello everyone!  
GA: Rose!!  


\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] opened a private conversation --  
\-- grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased responding to the memo --  
\-- tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased responding to the memo --  


TA: haha, there they go, off two 2op all over each other.  
TA: ii2n’t iit 2iickeniing.  
GC: H4H4H4H4 H3Y COOL K1D!!!  
GC: W4NN4 M4K3 4 *PR1V4T3 CH4T* TOO??  
TG: terezi!  
TG: hey, how you holding up?  
AG: Joooooooohn!!  
EB: hi vriska…  
AG: Aren’t you just del8ed to see me again?  
EB: …  
AT: hELLO, eVERYONE, hELLO HUMANS,  
CC: )(ello everyone!!! T)(is is so exiting, I’m )(appy you all made it!  
TA: ok, the aii wa2n’t kiiddiing about the iin2tant connectiion.  
TA: what the actual fuck!?  
CG: WHO GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THAT?  
TA: people who know 2hiit about phy2iic2 ii2 who.  
GG: yeah, physics seem to to be taking the day off a lot here…  
GG: and no one cares :(  
TA: they never do, riight up untiil iit biite2 them iin the a22 iin a major way.  
TG: way to be a wet blanket on our awesome shenanigans there  
TT: He’s right though, it really doesn’t work like this.  
TG: but wasnt that why you got up to your signal shenanigans in the first place? so it could work like this?  
TT: Not really.  
TA: hey, ar wa2 iit? do you miind explaiiniing what you diid?  
TT: We just connected a transmitter to a major power source and directed it at you. The idea was to send you a message, have you replicate the setup and then answer.  
TT: But instead it seems to have… You know, I have no clue what it did.  
GG: well just put in on the list  
CG: WHAT LIST?  
GG: we made a running list about all the things that are really weird here!  
GG: this definitely qualifies  
EB: who cares about that?  
EB: how are things on troll world?  
AT: oUR PLANET HAS A NAME YOU KNOW,  
EB: again with the stuff no one cares about.  
AG: Aw, defending our planet’s honor, Tavros?  
AT: fUCK OFF VRISKA,  
EB: i'm inclined to agree...  
AG: ::::(  
AG: You really aren’t happy to see me.  
EB: i wouldnt go that far, its just complicated i guess?  
AG: Yeah, it is kinda.  
EB: but how are things over there?  
CG: WELL, NOT UNUSUALLY FUCKED I SUPPOSE.  
CG: WE ARE NOW EXACTLY AS ASS BACKWARDS TECHNOLOGICALLY AS YOU.  
CG: NO INTERSTELLAR SPACE TRAVEL.  
CG: A LOT OF OLD TECH MISSING.  
CG: A LOT OF ADULTS RUNNING AROUND MAKING A NUISANCE OF THEMSELVES.  
GG: your old tech went missing too?  
GG: how strange!!  
CG: WHAT, YOURS TOO?  
GG: yeah… just boring old radio parts now  
GG: even my old bass is gone.  
CC: Your instrument is gone?  
CC: I’m sorry, I really liked )(earing you play.  
CC: T)(at blows :(  
GG: it really does :(  
GG: i still have a regular one, but its just not the same…  
GG: but did all of you make it back?  
GC: YEAH, ALMOST  
GC: ONE OF US IS STILL MISSING  
GG: one of us is missing too!  
GG: who is it  
AC: :33 < equius!!!  
TG: wait  
TG: he was your void player right  
CG: YEAH  
TG: roxy was too and she hasnt turned up yet either  
TG: rose!!!  
GG: rose?  
TT: You rang?  
TG: hey sorry to interrupt your awesome and totally not nauseatingly sweet reunion over there but this might be important  
TG: the trolls are also missing their hero of void  
TT: Oh?  
TT: Oh!  
TG: what does it mean?  
TT: How am I supposed to know?  
GG: you think this is maybe one of the mistakes? like the game had difficulties locating them or something?  
TT: That would make sense I suppose.  
TT: They are actually very hard to find, in a metaphysical sense.  
AC: :33 < rose?  
AC: :33 < equius has b33n missing for w33ks and i’m really worried.  
AC: :33 < what if the game didn’t bring him?  
TT: I’m sorry Nepeta, but I don’t know.  
TT: Roxy is my mom, or dancestor if you will, so I’m worried too.  
CG: WELL FUCK. HOW ARE WE SUPPOSED TO FIND THEM THEN?  
TT: I honestly don’t think the concept of “supposed to” still applies as it did in the game.  
TT: Here we are not provided with quests or required to perform certain actions.  
GG: the game obviously still has some influence over us though…  
GG: you said some rules still apply?  
TT: Yes. The mechanics around heroic and just deaths still apply, we still have our sylladexes and Davesprite still exists.  
TT: Assorted other aspects may yet come to light, like the nature and extent of our powers.  
TT: These are things the game changed, or implanted if you will, within us, changing aspects that belong to us personally.  
TT: External factors that affect the world however no longer seem to follow the same logic.  
TT: For all intents and purposes outside of ourselves, the game does not exist here.  
EB: but can’t you tell us what to do?  
EB: you can see all the “supposed toos”, right?  
TT: That is a strange way of thinking about it, but in a sense, yes.  
TT: But as I said, I can’t see her.  
TT: If I could, I would have found her already without much trouble.  
TT: I am reasonably certain I could find you, for instance, almost anywhere.  
EB: but she’s void and so you can’t.  
TT: I assume this is the reason, yes.  
AC: :33 < but who else is good at searching?  
TA: AA…  
CG: WHAT?  
TA: AA?  
AA: ah yes hi everyone!  
AA: sorry ive been so quiet the reception here is a pain and you are taking forever to load  
TA: oh thii2 ii2 not a good 2iign…  
CG: WHY? ISN’T SHE UNDERGROUND OR SOMETHING?  
TA: 2he ii2. but they are iin outer 2pace kk! on the other 2iide of the 2un!  
TA: 2o why would her receptiion be wor2e than theiir2?  
CG: OH SHIT  
AA: hang on this is strange  
TA: what ii2?  
AA: i can see a light down this tunnel!!  


\-- apocalypseArisen [AA] lost connection to board FRUITY REUNION RUMPUS --  


CG: SHIT!!!  


\-- twinArmageddons [TA] ceased responding to the memo --  



	17. ==> Aradia: Find the hidden

At first it was just a vague shimmering in the distance, but as Aradia approached it became more and more pronounced. A greenish light, weak but unflickering. She turned off her flashlight to see it more clearly. The end of the passage was a blank stone wall, but the light was shining through a rectangular crack. Unconsciously holding her breath, Aradia placed one hand against the wall and pushed. It gave way with surprising ease, opening inward on ancient stone hinges, creaking like claws on chalkboard. Behind it there lay a small bare room and in the middle sat a figure, legs crossed and hunched over them as if unconscious or asleep. Around her, there were many small, glowing tubes littered around the floor.

Very carefully, Aradia entered and approached. Even in the dim light it was obvious that this was no troll. She had no horns and her skin, though illuminated in a sickly green, was not gray. She was also wearing the colors of void in the style of a rogue.

“Roxy?” Aradia asked in a whisper. “Why am I whispering?” she wondered aloud then and repeated the question in her normal voice, “are you Roxy Lalonde?” When there was no reaction she approached further and knelt down beside her. After hesitating for a second she then reached out and touched her shoulder.

Roxy woke up with a gasp and a start, spinning around to Aradia and getting up on her knees. Then she groaned and slid sideways until she was lying on her side. “Argh, fuck,” she exclaimed, “my legs have just completely gone to sleep, ouch.”

Surprised, Aradia laughs. “That’s what you get from sleeping in that position! Are you alright?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just give me a second for my legs to come back online, then I will be all onboard for this rescue mission of yours.”

“Rescue mission? Were you imprisoned here?”

“I guess? I don’t really know… I’m Roxy by the way, I don’t think I’ve met you before?” She sat up a bit, reached down and started rubbing her shins.

“I know your name,” Aradia said, “everyone does! But I’m Aradia, and pleased to meet you!”

Roxy smiled a little, even though she was still grimacing at her legs. “Nice to meet you, Aradia!” She said and then looked her over for the first time. “Wow, you have really awesome horns!”

Aradia tried not to blush. “Er, thank you!”

“Wait, you are one of Terezi’s group of players, right?”

“That I am. I am the Maid of Time, to be exact. And you are the Rogue of Void and the ancestor of Rose Lalonde?”

“Yepp, that’s me alright! But where on earth am I?” Roxy started rubbing her feet, seemingly a lot more comfortable already.

“This is where things get complicated, I’m afraid. Do you remember nothing of how you got here?”

“No… I remember the door opening and shooting through. Then everything went dark and I think I fell asleep? Then I woke up here.”

“Ah, and what are these?” Aradia nudged one of the lights with her foot suspiciously.

“They’re glowsticks! Don’t you know them? I made them while I was here. They’re just for practice, really.”

“You made them? From what?”

“From nothing, of course!” Roxy grinned and Aradia chuckled.

“That makes sense,” Aradia chuckled, “that sounds like a very powerful thing to be able to do.”

“It is, in theory. In practice I still have a lot of, well, practice to put in before I can make anything more useful,” Roxy said and reached over to pick up the nearest one, turning it around in her hand. “Do you have a light? These really don’t illuminate that much.”

“Yes, I have a light.” Aradia sayd and flicked her torch back on, making Roxy shield her eyes and groan, “ugh, yeah, that’s bright. But you still haven’t told me where we are.”

Aradia turned towards the door again and waved for Roxy to follow. “I’ll tell you while we walk. It’s quite a way.”

Roxy got to her feat carefully, testing them for a few steps before she gained the confidence that they were indeed fully functional again, and together they started walking back down the tunnel and Aradia started explaining. “It appears that after the game ended, both of our planets were transported, or created, here, in orbit around the same star. Our group and yours woke up here, coming through the door or from the dreambubbles.”

“Wait. Does that mean everyone’s alive again?”

“We believe so, yes. One of us is still missing, and we have found none of our dancestors yet, but all eight humans are now present and accounted for.”

“Wow. That’s a relief! So, on which planet am I then?”

“You are on Alternia, I’m afraid. We don’t know why. We also don’t know why you woke up in an ancient ruin of our civilization when everyone else woke up in our near their old homes.”

Roxy fell silent behind her and Aradia turned her head. When she noticed she quickly wipes her eyes. “Ugh, don’t mind me,” she said with a faint crack in her voice, “I’m fine. I just want to go home too, you know? Or at least, find out what my home is like now.”

“I understand. I’m sorry about this.”

“Are you apologizing for your planet?” Roxy tried to smile and Aradia did too.

“I suppose I am. Damn thing is never where it’s supposed to be.”

Roxy actually chuckled. “But you have spoken to our group then?”

“Yes, we have. They are all well and safe, but miss you a lot. Your descendant especially seemed distraught at your disappearance.”

“I tried to message them, but it didn’t work. No surprise there, being on a different planet and all I guess. How did you do it?”

“They made a setup of some kind that turned out to work a lot better than anticipated. If you message them again when we get out, it might work. I hope…”

“Why?”

“Well, the reception is very bad down here, and it got worse the closer I got to you. I think that this is a blackout you may have caused. But I hope that it will clear out as soon as you want it to.”

“Huh, really? I wonder if it’s like the blackout I had when I entered the Game. Calliope couldn’t see me then anymore either… Wait! You haven’t seen her around, have you?” 

“No, we have not. So far the cherub’s fate remains a mystery.”

“Oh. Damn, I had hoped I would get to meet her one day.”

“From what I hear, she must have been a lovely person! Don’t give up hope quite yet though, there have been quite a few miracles going around lately.”

Roxy was quiet for a while, lost in thought, before she spoke again. “Yeah, that’s certainly true. Anyhow, this way I get to see your planet. First human on Alternia! But wait… Won’t I get killed when someone sees me?”

“They might possibly try, I don’t know. A lot here has changed compared to our old home. But I’m not too worried, I think you can handle yourself against a few trolls, or even drones. I know I can.”

Roxy huffed and nodded. “I suppose we are technically their gods now.”

“Indeed we are! Ah, and there is our exit.”

They came to the hole that Aradia first fell through and bright daylight was shining through the torn roots that covered it. Roxy levitated herself up first and gave a cry of surprise from above. Aradia hurried to follow, and saw her standing a few feet away, staring at something behind her. When she turned she saw Sollux, hovering five feet off the ground and sparking. “Aradia!” He called and landed in front of her. His sparks were making the air smell sharp, and he was frowning. “Damnit AA, you scared me!” he muttered and she smiled and hugged him, ignoring the slightly unpleasant static shocks he was still giving off.

“You worry too much, Sollux!” She said, “look, I just found a human!”

Sollux sidestepped her and frowned at Roxy. “So you caused the blackout then?” He asked.

“Sollux!” Aradia chided, “don’t be rude! Roxy, this is Sollux. Sollux, Roxy.”

“Hi…” Roxy said uncertainly and Sollux grunted.

“She’s the one the humans are missing. She’ll be staying with us until we find a way to get her home.”

“Ok, I guess. Welcome to Alternia, Roxy. Don’t mind the shitty culture or the people trying to kill you or the fact that we are now a low tech dump.”

Aradia laughed. “Don’t whine Sollux, it’s unattractive. Besides, you got your old rig back, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, I did, and then the humans went and did something completely physically impossible that even old Alternia couldn’t have pulled off.”

“Ah, Roxy, don’t mind him, he’s just jealous,” Aradia giggled.

“Wait, hold on. What did they do?” Roxy asks, suddenly intrigued.

“They established a functional internet connection between planets, over a distance of 2AU. A connection with amazing streaming rates, allowing for close to real time conversations.”

Roxy stared at him,“but that’s impossible!” 

Sollux just stared back. “I’m telling you it’s impossible! But they did it anyway, physics can just go fuck themselves!”

“Could you show me? I’d really like to know how they did that! Also I’d like to talk to them, you know.”

“yeah, sure, I’ll show you.” Sollux huffed and turned to Aradia, who laughed to herself and led the way back to her home. She didn’t think those two would have any trouble getting along, one way or another.


	18. ==> Technology: Reunite the parted

It was very early in the morning when Jane woke up with a sudden start. It had been one of those dreams again, the kind that didn’t leave behind a clear picture, just a poisonous red color and the feeling of being replaced in your own mind. Not that she could ever explain that any better if she tried, and up until now she had not tried. It never seemed to help to dwell on nightmares anyway.

With a sigh she peeled herself out of bed, careful not to wake Jade who was still snoring gently and shuffled to the bathroom. By the time she had used the toilet and had a drink of water it was still dark outside, so she crept back into her room and booted up the computer. She was very tired, but no good ever came from going back to sleep after one of the worse nightmares, so she might as well do a bit of reading up on the new world’s history. Trying not to get her hopes up to much about it she opened up pesterchum as well and gasped in surprise when she saw her message window blinking. 

— TipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering gutsyGumshoe [GG] \--   


TG: jaaaaane!  
TG: hey i know youre offline right now but i just wanted to let you know im ok!  
TG: …  
TG: u there?  
TG: nah, you arent. i know. i just really want to talk to you  
TG: hey look at me, talking to a grey icon in the middle of the night  
TG: though u guess i might as well get used to being awake at night  
TG: when in rome and so on…  
GG: Roxy!!!  
GG: Oh my gosh Roxy, where are you?   
GG: I’m so happy to hear from you, you have no idea!  
TG: jane!  
TG: id say i have some idea! :3  
TG: how are u?  
GG: Fine, I guess. I’m in my old house, though it’s John’s house too.  
GG: It’s alright.  
GG: But what about you?   
GG: You have some nerve, actually, asking me how I am when you’re the one who was missing all this time!  
TG: hehe sorry about that!  
TG: how long was it?  
GG: Weeks, Roxy! Where have you been?  
TG: weeks? wown no, it was just a day or two for me  
TG: i woke up in a very dark room like a cellar or something in this old abandoned ruin like thing  
TG: and i was trapped, but its fine now a troll came and rescued me  
TG: which brings me to the bad news  
TG: im on alternia  
GG: Oh no!  
GG: How did you end up there?  
TG: i havent the faintest  
TG: rose seems to think that the game had trouble getting a good grip on void players and we ended up in some random dump because of it  
TG: the trolls voidy one is missing too  
GG: Ok, wait. Are you telling me you sat in some dark cellar for days?  
TG: yepp  
GG: And you didn’t try to get out?  
GG: Or call us, or anything? Why?  
TG: i…  
TG: janey…  
TG: i thought you were all dead!  
TG: the last time i saw you you had a sword through your chest!  
TG: i couldnt get a signal down there and it was dark and i didnt know where i was or what had happened or if i was even supposed to care anymore!  
GG: Roxy!  
GG: I’m so sorry.  
GG: Also I really want to hug you right now  
GG: :(  
GG: But you can’t just give up like that! What would you have done if the troll hadn’t found you?  
GG: All this time I was thinking you hadn’t made it!  
TG: im sorry jane  
TG: but im fine now! just a little homesick  
TG: but the trolls are very nice to me  
TG: at least the one who found me is, aradia  
TG: sollux is a big grumpypants most of the time   
TG: hes a good guy, just good at hiding it too  
TG: but he has a really sweet computer setup  
TG: all out organic tech and its really powerful  
GG: But isn’t Alternia all kinds of dangerous?  
TG: we havent had any trouble here  
TG: i think they all know to stay away from two god tier players and one irritable dude who can microwave things with his mind  
GG: Sound like you are having quite the adventure over there!  
TG: yeah its totes awesome  
TG: by which I mean i really had enough of awesome adventures and want to go home  
GG: But can’t you do that somehow? I don’t know, find a way?  
TG: i dont know how!  
TG: the trolls are not a starfaring species anymore they are just as stuck on their rock as we are on ours  
TG: apparently they can get to their own moon with great effort and cost just like we can but thats about it  
GG: But can’t you, like, appearify stuff? From nothing?  
TG: i dont think i can make an entire spaceship   
TG: i dont have the first idea about what goes into one of those  
GG: Yeah, that makes sense.  
GG: :(  
GG: but… Oh!  
GG: Can’t you make a transportaliser?  
TG: i dont know what goes into those either  
GG: Hm…  
GG: Do you really need to know every component, and how it works?  
TG: i think so yeah  
TG: i definitely need to have a very clear idea of what it is im trying to make  
TG: and as awesome as my awesome powers are, i never got a very good handle on them you know  
TG: i tried making the trolls matriorb back in the game and didnt get very far  
GG: But you did get somewhere?  
TG: yeah more or less  
GG: And you don’t know how a matriorb actually works, do you?  
TG: well its just some kind of egg isnt it?  
GG: And how do those work? What are the components of an egg, Roxy?  
TG: uh well, theres the yoke and the whites… yeah I dont have a clue  
TG: but i do know they arent magic  
GG: That depends entirely on your definition of magic.   
GG: Which in this case just means: “sufficiently advanced life”  
GG: And what you are trying to make is “sufficiently advanced technology”  
TG: am i trying to make that?  
GG: Yes! You definitely are.  
TG: oh ok. but i dont even know where to start  
GG: Roxy…  
TG: but ill do my best I promise  
TG: john told me that developing powers is easiest when there is something you really need to accomplish some way  
GG: And this counts?  
TG: i think it does yeah. being on another planet is neat and all  
TG: but i do really want to go home  
GG: I really want you to come home too!  
GG: But why don’t you go practice for now? The sun’s coming up and I want to make breakfast before everyone wakes up and meddles with my kitchen.  
TG: huh, ok. why did you get up that early?  
GG: So no one would meddle with my kitchen!   
GG: :)  
TG: wow, that was some transparent bullshit right there jane  
TG: dont give my that shit  
TG: are you having nightmares?  
GG: Yeah, a bit… How do you know?  
TG: because im sure that not a single one of us doesnt  
TG: but you go and make breakfast janey  
TG: ill be here, surrounded by green cubes until i get the hang of it  
TG: and then ill just tap my heels three times and come home  


— tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering gutsyGumshoe [GG] \--   


Jane sighed and leaned back from the computer. She never could pull the wool over Roxy’s eyes and it had probably been silly to try. But still, it was good to have her back, even though she had expected it to feel different. When she had thought about finding her again she expected to feel completely ecstatic about it, but now it was just a strange emptiness and vague sadness. She was back, and that was great and all, but she was still trapped on a foreign planet without any means to get home. If she really was capable of creating a transportaliser was still anyone’s guess, and so Jane still found herself waiting. She tried for a while to forcibly remind herself that at least Roxy was alright and alive and had gotten out of the game in one piece like everyone else. It was a start.

She took a second to check on Jade, who was still fast asleep and then quietly crept out of the room. She passed John’s bedroom that he was sharing with Dave for the time being on the way down and listened for any activity, but everything remained silent. Upon entering the kitchen she found that her baking efforts of the last days were all but gone and she smiled internally. If unwatched muffins could still disappear with such alacrity things really couldn’t be that far wrong. 


	19. ==> Jane: Find the lost

Jane had put the kettle  on and was just contemplating making pancakes for the others again when she heard a very quiet knocking at the front door. She supposed it was actually strange that no one from the neighborhood had looked by yet to see what was up with the two teenagers living alone next door, so she was braced for any combination of inquisitive suburbanites when she opened the door. Instead, she found a troll.

He was very tall indeed and very broad, almost filling up the entire door frame. He had long straight black hair and wore cracked rectangular sunglasses, shorts and a t-shirt with a blue Sagittarius arrow on it. One of his horns was broken. He was standing there and staring at her, shifting from foot to foot and shivering slightly in the chill early morning air. And then, to her utter surprise, he bowed to her.

“Greetings,” he said, his voice deep and raspy, “are you Jane Crocker?”

“Huh!” she replied intelligently, before regaining her wits. “Yes, that is me. Please, come in!” She moved out of the door for him and he entered cautiously, wiping his feet diligently on the welcome mat and then looking around.

“I was just making breakfast!” she said, leading the way to the kitchen, “coffee should be done soon, do you want any?”

“You are most kind. Though I do not wish to impose and I do have an, ah, unfortunate propensity towards breaking eating implements…” 

“Why would you do that?”

“I don’t do it on purpose. I just can’t always regulate the  strength of my hands, I fear,” he said with strange emphasis.

“Oh, that is not a problem! Just hang on a tick!” She searched the cupboards and found what she remembered seeing there when she first got back, a large thermos mug made of metal. She poured him and herself some coffee and then gestured for him to sit. “I don’t know why we have this, but it appears we are well equipped to serve coffee even to the strongest trolls,” she said and smiled at him. He smiled back at her awkwardly and she could see that quite a few of his teeth were broken too. “Now, let me see,” she started again once they were both seated, “they told me all about you trolls and you are the Sagittarius… Equius, I think, is that right?”

“That is correct,” he answered, relaxing slightly on his chair, “though I do not know what Sagittarius means.”

“Your sign. It was the sign of the constellation of Sagittarius back on old earth, the bowman.”

“Oh!” He exclaimed and his smile widened, ”yes, that is me. Though on Alternia, the name of my sign, and thus my last name, is Zahhak.”

“Nice to meet you then, Equius Zahhak.”

“It is nice to meet you too, Jane Crocker.”

“So, how do you know who I am? I don’t think we have met.”

“I do not believe we have. But this is the home of John Egbert, and you are his, ah, relative? Is that the word?”

“Yes, it is. And it is a much nicer word for it than “dancestor”.”

“It seems more elegant to me as well, though I can’t exactly relate to the concept”. He took a sip of his coffee and hummed appreciatively.

“Was that a pun?” Jane asked, slightly incredulous. He did not seem the type to make jokes.

“Ah, I do not know what you are referring too.” He muttered, but hid his mouth behind his mug.

Jane grinned too. “Don’t worry, it was a good one! But I do have to ask, how did you get here?”

He looked up from the mug again at her earnestly. “I don’t know. I recall searching, and being dead, and then I was… not me, for a while. Then I just wished to go home and found myself standing by your door. But it would appear that I am not.”

“Oh! Roxy! I think she may have appearified you!”

“What? By which I mean, excuse me?”

“Oh, it’s a long story… Ok, here’s the deal: This is earth, or a copy of it at least. Alternia is here too, but on the other side of the sun. I think the game ended, and we all woke up at home, but somehow the void players got mixed up. My friend Roxy is on Alternia, and you are here. She is trying to find a way home, but I think she may have found you instead. Or made you find yourself, somehow.”

“Oh…” Equius fell silent and contemplated his mug. After a while he spoke up again. “But does that mean… The others, are they back too?”

“The other trolls? Yes. Now that you are back, everyone is accounted for.”

Equius jumped up from his seat, narrowly avoiding knocking over the table and chair, but still holding his cup, “I must speak with them! I must… ah, Nepeta! She never gave me an answer…” He started pacing, muttering. “But no… I asked her once and she didn’t answer, what right do I have to ask again? But maybe she couldn’t answer? She was not herself either, I recall…”

“Equius!” Jane called, but he didn’t react. She got up and came around the table to put a hand on his arm, wincing slightly at how damp it was. He stops in his tracks and looks down at her, grimacing in distress.

“Here, why don’t you sit down again? I’m sure it’ll clear itself up. I’m going to make pancakes, do you like pancakes? Come one, it’ll be fine with your friend, you’ll see!”

“Moirail,” Equius said quietly and sat down again slowly, putting his mug down. It now had a set of finger shaped dints. “She was my moirail.”

Jane wiped her hand off surreptitiously and then started to gather ingredients from the cupboards. “Moirail, right. What happened?”

“I failed her. I failed to protect her because I was weak. She died.” He put both arms on the table and hunched over them.

“Oh. I’m sorry! Here, I think this occasion calls for the chocolate pancake variety! But…” she came over to him again and put her hand on a massive shoulder, “you should know that she was asking about you. When we spoke to the trolls, she asked if we could find you. It will all be fine, you’ll see.”

She felt a rippling quiver run over his back and quickly turned away towards the stove to give him some privacy. Just as she was mixing the batter, Jade came into the kitchen and stopped short in surprise.

“Oh, hi Equius!” She said, “to say I was not expecting you here is something of an understatement!”

Equius tensed and sat up straight again. “Hello Jade,” he said, “I also did not expect to be here.”

“Yeah, I can imagine! Welcome to earth! How did you get here?”

“I do not know, though Jane suspects that Roxy Lalonde did it.”

“Oh, Roxy is back?” Jade exclaimed. 

Jane picked up the mixing bowl and turned back to the room. “Yes, she is. But she’s on Alternia, and well, Equius is here now. So there’s that. But she’s working on getting a transportaliser to work between here and there, and then come home. I hope.”

“Huh…” Jade said and got herself a mug. “Well then. I guess this goes on the list of strange and impossible things too.”

“It’s becoming quite the list,” Dave said from the door where he stood with a very sleepy looking John, “cool.” He just nodded to Equius while John did a little wave before they both also made a beeline for the coffee.

“Oh, sweet, pancakes!” Dave said and tried to get a finger into the bowl. Jane was ready for that though and quickly turned away with it, brandishing the spoon at him. “You take your grubby hands away and sit down. You’ll get enough when I’m done.”

She started heating up a pan on the stove and pouring out the batter, turning now and then to watch her friends sit around the table and chatter about nothing. That is, Jade and Dave where chattering. John still looked rather zombified and Equius was still sitting ramrod straight, frowning slightly and evidently trying to make sense of what Dave and Jade were talking about, which Jane could also not have deciphered if she tried, and the mug in his hands was creaking gently.

As the pancakes were frying, Jane took out plates and cutlery and put them on the table, where Jade and Dave quickly distributed them. Equius cleared his throat and half rose from his chair. 

“Is anything missing, Equius?” Jane asked lightly, flipping the pan while half turning to him.

“You only put down four plates, Jane. I would assist you in getting yours, but as I said, I have a tendency… Uh, I mean I don’t want to break your plates.”

Jane moved quickly to get a fifth plate and laughed, “oh yeah, silly me!”

When she came back to the table with the plate and the first batch of pancakes, John was frowning at her thoughtfully. “So…” he started and then spaced out a bit before continuing, “what do we do now? Except wait for Roxy to make us a transportaliser to Alternia, that is.”

“Well, Equius will call the trolls of course,” Jade said between mouthfuls, “they were so worried about you!”

“Ah, yes, Jane said,” Equius answered, “But didn’t you say that they are on another planet entirely?”

“Haha, yes,” Jade laughed, “and you are one of the few who pick up on that little tidbit. Yes, the connection is instant, no, we don’t know how.”

Equius frowned. “That is not right. How is that possible?”

“For that question, go to answer two,” Dave said with his mouth full, “don’t worry about it. Anytime something impossible happens we just put it on the list.”

“You have a list for impossible things?”

“Yeah, basically.”

“After everything that occurred in the game?”

“Huh, good point. Might almost have been my point exactly,” Dave said and then turned to Jade, “why do we give a shit about this again?”

Equius winced slightly and Jade glared at Dave. “Because,” she said, “we are not in the game anymore. Also it’s fascinating!”

“You know what I would like to know?” John butted in from the edge of the conversation, evidently waking up a little, “is why we own this house. Or at least, why no one else does. Even if we hadn’t almost literally fallen out of the sky to find it just sitting here, waiting for us, we would both not be able to legally own it, would we?”

“Well,” Jane said, “we can own the house just fine I think, just living in it alone is a problem. If anyone finds out we don’t have legal guardians we are in trouble.”

“Ah, not really,” John said, “I mean, what are they going to do?

“Why would they even care?” Dave asked.

“Because this is suburbia,” Jane said, “here they care about how tall your grass is and will make a federal production of it if you forget to mow it once a week. But no one has as much as peeped in through the windows. It’s very strange.”

“Wow, what you call strange I call fucking creepy,” Dave said, “there had better not be some old dude watching us through the blinds.”

“Ah, don’t worry about it. If anyone does we can always make him question his sanity by just levitating a few feet off the ground,” John grinned, “and no one would ever believe him!”

“You wanted to do that all along, didn’t you?” Jade asked.

“Hell yeah! Think of all the pranks we could pull now!” John said.

Jane giggled too as she thought it through. “Indeed there is a lot we could do! Just imagine Halloween! This is going to be one haunted town, that’s for sure.”

“Honestly, the only reason I haven’t gotten on any freak weather warnings yet is that I really don’t know what would happen… I mean, what would they actually do if they found out about us?”

“Or if they found out about Equius.” Dave added. “I think we should probably keep it on the down-low for now.”

“Yeah, you’re probably right,” John said, “I still want to find out about our legal status, or at least that of this house.”

“That shouldn’t be too hard,” Jane said, “we can start on that right away! You can clean up the dishes and leftovers, I’ll show Equius the computer.”

Everyone groaned a bit and she laughed before leading him out of the kitchen. Cooking really was a lot more fun if you didn’t have to deal with the aftermath.

 


	20. ==> Feferi: learn the meaning of a word

It was getting dark again and Feferi leaned back from the husktop, stretching her back. Shortly before Gamzee had gone into the kitchen and now there was a distinct aroma of baked goods wafting from the door. She rose to investigate and found Gamzee crouching in front of the oven, watching his handywork rise in the heat.

“Gamzee, that smells lovely!” she said, “I didn’t know you could bake!”

He didn’t look around at her. “Ah, well, been a while that I got up to baking anything a brother would all consider actual food like, but there’s a hang all to it that is not ever forgotten easy like. And there’s not much else I could be getting my making on of right about now.”

“What are you baking?”

“Ah, these motherfuckers be called scones I’ve been told. Or haven’t been told at, but heard humans all call them that.”

“The humans taught you baking recipes? When?”

“Nah, they never went and did that, but I was all up and watching them do it in times long ago.” He turned and sat down on the floor, leaning against the warm oven door and looked up at Feferi. “Say, sister, if I’m all allowed to ask at this any more, how be the brothers and sisters all holding up?”

“They are all fine. Or at least, they are going to be.” She pulled up a chair and sat down, watching him, before they both noticed that she had left her trident by the computer. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” She exclaimed and got up again, “I just forgot it.”

He sighed and looked very tired indeed suddenly. “Nah, don’t need to bother yourself for sakes all mine. Ain’t a secret no more it’s not for you I want you all armed and shit.” He laughed a little, dry and sad, “I’ve never felt less like getting up from this here spot any how, maybe you needn’t be guarding me no more.”

“Alright. I’m glad to hear that Gamzee. Or at least, I think I am. You are very strange, do you know that?”

He tried to laugh again, but all it really amounted to was him saying “heh” with a flat voice. “Ain’t the first to get a note of that, it’s for motherfucking sure. Also ain’t the first time a brother’s thought the same of you.”

“You think I’m strange? Why?”

“You are here. Did they all tell you what this motherfucker did?”

“Yes, they did. You know, I want to ask you why you did it, but I’m really not sure if I want to know.”

“Ah, yeah, maybe you all don’t. I know I don’t. It doesn’t get to being a matter of all that much importance now though, does it.”

“It doesn’t?”

“Nah, I don’t think so. Ain’t a thing they asked after, was it?”

“Hm, no. But I think if we knew why, it would help a lot towards forgiving you. That’s generally how it works.”

He drew back his lips and bared his teeth at her and she had to fight the instinctual urge to answer the challenge. Hers were sharper, she was sure.

“That is not. How it motherfucking works,” he growled, “what do you expect? That you get some sad story all pitiful and pale for you to tell at them that I was just all up and misunderstood? That being me is a thing I could not all help and none of it was my doing by will because a sudden I seem all harmless and weak to you right about now?”

“No…” she stuttered, suddenly caught off guard, “I don’t know, maybe? If you don’t want to hurt me now, why did you want to hurt them then?”

He rose up on his knees and leaned towards her, still snarling, curling his claws on his legs and suddenly Feferi felt a fear and burning anger clamp down on her chest with a force that knocked out her breath and making her rise half way out of her chair.

“It is because, sister, what motherfuckers want down in their hearts can be a thing all of darkness and death, and if they have terror in them, terror goes before them and they crush the terror and the terrible all together, those weaker as them and stronger, those they hate at and those they pity and all the world shall feel them and themselves in them.”

For a long while, neither of them moved an inch or even breathe. After a long time, Feferi felt the grasp on her lungs lessen gradually as Gamzee relaxed back against the cupboard and they both took a deep breath, before Gamzee spoke up again with startling gentleness. “That, my trusting sister, is Rage.”

“I…” she tried and had to swallow hard to find her voice again, “I never knew what it means.”

“Yeah, neither did I. I been all wandering from one ignorance to the next all this motherfucking time. Never wanted to get my seeing on to what was the meaning of the title the game up and gave me for a reason that seems all to clear to all motherfuckers now.”

“I don’t know if I really understand, or if it is clear to me what this means. What if you don’t want to be like that?”

“Then I don’t all want to be like that. Ain’t a thing I get to be deciding on. What I be wanting and wanting to want ain’t naught but stardust in wind all blowing this ways and that. It’d take a motherfucker a lot more strong than this one to go and stuff it all back in the box.”

Silence fell between them again and Feferi tried to parse what he had told her, which turned out to be all the more difficult for the adrenaline that now cooling sickly in her veins, before a sudden thought struck her. “But what if… what if what was inside them wasn’t terror?”

“Huh?” Gamzee asked, looking at her suddenly as if he didn’t even remember what they where talking about and then tilted his head thoughtfully.

“What if they aren’t afraid or angry?” She explained.

“Then whatever else fills their hearts will be at what’s all driving them. It’s not a thing of mystery, sister. You will be doing whatever it is your bloodpusher wants you to be doing at, but you can’t be having what you’re wanting at whenever you get a mind on to wanting it.”

“You can do what you want, but you can’t want what you want?” Feferi translated.

“Hehe, yeah. See, you be getting it. Just as I be getting these wicked scones now.”

He turned back to the oven and opened it, releasing a wave of delicious, sweet steam. They were a little dark around the edges but had a lovely golden color in the middle and sizzled gently on the baking pan.

 


	21. ==> Terezi: Be the seer

\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--  


GC: K444RK4T  
GC: COM3 1N K4RK4T  
GC: …  
GC: 1 KNOW YOU’R3 TH3R3 4ND 1 KNOW YOU 4R3 R34D1NG TH1S R1GHT NOW  
GC: WH1L3 H4V1NG NOTH1NG B3TT3R TO DO WH4TSO3V3R  
GC: SO YOU M1GHT 4S W3LL JUST OWN UP 4ND 4NSW3R M3  
CG: OH, HI TEREZI.  
CG: HOW ARE YOU DOING?  
GC: 1M F1N3 1 TH1NK   
GC: H34L1NG 4T L34ST  
GC: BUT BOR3D  
GC: HON3STLY SOOO BOR3D  
GC: N3P3T4 WON’T L3T M3 MOV3 4T 4LL!  
GC: 4ND 1T’S SW33T SORT OF  
GC: 4ND 4LSO 4MUS1NG HOW SH3 TR13S TO NOT S4Y ‘NO D14MONDS’ 4LL TH3 T1M3  
GC: BUT 1TS BOR1NG  
CG: SO YOU JUST THOUGHT I WOULD PROVIDE ENTERTAINMENT?  
GC: WH3N H4V3 YOU 3V3R F41L3D TO PROV1D3 M3 W1TH 3NT3RT41NM3NT K4RK4T?  
GC: YOU 4R3 TH3 MOST 3NT3RT41N1NG TROLL 1 KNOW  
GC: BUT TH4T’S NOT WHY 1’M M3SS4G1NG YOU  
CG: NO?  
GC: N3P3T4 H4S 4LSO B33N G3TT1NG ON MY C4S3 1N 4 M4JOR W4Y TO CONT4CT YOU  
GC: SH3 TH1NKS 1T’S 1MPORT4NT W3 T4LK  
GC: 4ND 1 TH1NK 1T’S 1MPORT4NT SH3 STOPS M3DDL1NG  
GC: SO WHY DON’T YOU T3LL M3 WH4T’S UP B3FOR3 SH3 T13S H3RS3LF 1N KNOTS TRY1NG NOT TO T3LL M3 WH4T YOU W4NT TO T3LL M3  
CG: … WOW, REALLY?  
CG: SHE WAS REALLY ADAMANT ABOUT NOT TELLING YOU.  
CG: BUT YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST WAIT TILL SHE CAVES.  
CG: IT’S NOT LIKE IT’S NOT PUBLIC FUCKING RECORD AT THIS POINT ANYWAY.  
GC: 1T 4PP34RS 1 4M NOT 4 M3MB3R OF TH3 PUBL1C TH3N B3C4US3 1 DON’T KNOW  
GC: SO YOU C4N 3V4D3 SOM3 MOR3 FOR 4 F3W MOR3 T1R1NG P4R4GR4PHS  
GC: OR YOU COULD JUST T3LL M3  
GC: WH4TS UP?  
CG: I…  
CG: WOW THIS SUCKS.  
CG: OK, HERE GOES:  
CG: I’M REALLY FUCKING SORRY, OK?  
CG: I FAILED YOU AND I’M SORRY.  
GC: OK… NOW YOU S41D 1T BUT 1T ST1LL DO3SN’T M4K3 S3NS3  
GC: HOW D1D YOU F41L M3?  
CG: ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO MAKE ME SAY IT?  
CG: FINE I GUESS, I DESERVE THAT.  
CG: I COULDN’T SAVE YOU.  
CG: I SHOULD HAVE, BUT I JUST FAILED IN THE MOST PATHETIC, PANTS-SHITTING WAY IMAGINABLE AND YOU GOT HURT SO BADLY BECAUSE OF ME.  
GC: WO4H OK HOLD UP TH3R3  
GC: WH4T?  
GC: 1 KNOW YOU W4NT TO B3 R3SPONS1BL3 FOR 3V3RYTH1NG 3V3R BUT YOU W1LL N33D TO 1LLUM1N4T3 M3 ON TH1S PO1NT 1F 1 4M SUPPOS3D TO B3L13V3  
GC: TH4T YOU LOS1NG 1N 4 H34D ON 4TT4CK ON SOM3ON3 PHYS1C4LLY F4R SUP3R1OR TO YOU  
GC: 4ND DY1NG 1N TH3 PROC3SS M4Y 1 SUBTLY R3M1ND YOU  
GC: M4K3S YOU 1N 4NY W4Y R3SPONS1BL3 FOR WH4T H4PP3N3D TO M3  
GC: YOU MUST TH1NK 1 CR4CK3D MY H34D F4R H4RD3R TH4N 1 D1D  
GC: NOW 1F YOU W4NT TO 4POLOG1S3 FOR RUSH1NG H1M L1K3 4 COMPL3T3 MORON 4ND DY1NG S3NS3L3SSLY FOR M3 1’M 4LL 34RS BY TH3 W4Y  
CG: IF THAT IS WHAT YOU WANT, FINE.  
CG: I APOLOGISE FOR THAT TOO.   
CG: BUT THAT’S NOT REALLY WHAT I MEANT. HE WAS MY RESPONSIBILITY BACK ON THE METEOR AND I KNOW I DON’T EVEN KNOW HALF OF THE FUCKED UP SHIT HE MUST HAVE DONE TO YOU THERE.  
CG: BUT HE WAS MY MOIRAIL BACK THEN AND I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN.  
CG: I SHOULD HAVE STOPPED HIM THEN.  
CG: IF I HAD HE WOULDN’T HAVE ATTACKED YOU ON LOFAF.  
GC: HM OK 1 S33 TH3R3 4R3 4 F3W TH1NGS GO1NG ON H3R3 TH4T YOU 4R3 WRONG 4BOUT L3TS JUST S33 1F 1 C4N L1ST TH3M  
CG: NO!  
CG: TEREZI PLEASE. I KNOW YOU WANT TO GO ALL MINDY ON ME NOW, BUT BEFORE YOU DO THAT AND I START CHOWING DOWN ON MY OWN ANGUISH BLADDER CAN YOU JUST PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU ACCEPT MY APOLOGY?  
CG: I UNDERSTAND COMPLETELY IF YOU DON’T I JUST… WANT TO KNOW.  
GC: OH BOY   
GC: 4LR1GHT 1 4CC3PT YOUR 4POLOGY FOR NOT CONTROLL1NG YOUR MO1R41L 4ND NOT NOT1C1NG SOM3TH1NG W3 BOTH SP3NT CONS1D3R4BL3 3FFORT 1N H1D1NG FROM YOU  
GC: TH3 4POLOGY 1 DO NOT 4CC3PT B3C4US3 YOU H4V3 NOT OFF3R3D 1T 1S 4BOUT HOW B4DLY YOU UND3R3ST1M4T3 M3 4ND F41L TO UND3RST4ND R34LLY B4S1C STUFF H3R3  
CG: WHAT!?  
GC: K4RK4T OK L3T M3 BR34K TH1S DOWN FOR YOU  
GC: TH3 T1M3 ON TH3 M3T3OR W4S B4D OK? 1T W4S 4 R34LLY SH1TTY T1M3 FOR 4LL OF US  
GC: BUT WH4T DO YOU TH1NK H4PP3N3D TO M3?  
GC: TH4T 1 W4S JUST H4NG1NG 4ROUND B31NG 4LL D3PR3SS3D 4ND SH1T  
GC: TH4T YOU F41L3D TO K33P G4MZ33 1N CH3CK 4ND 1N R3SULT H3 PR4Y3D ON M3?  
CG: IS THAT NOT WHAT HAPPENED?  
GC: NO 1T 1S NOT!  
GC: HOW 4BOUT TH1S:  
GC: 1 D1D SOM3TH1NG 1 THOUGHT 1 H4D TO 4ND D34LT W1TH TH3 CONS3QU3NC3S  
GC: WH1CH 1 W4S SH1T 4T 4ND TR13D TO DO BY GO1NG 4FT3R G4MZ33 1N 4 R34LLY STUP1D 4TT3MPT 4T PUN1SH1NG BOTH OF US  
GC: WH1CH H3 TH3N TURN3D ON M3 1N 4 M4JOR W4Y  
GC: TW1C3  
GC: COM3 TO TH1NK OF 1T YOU M1GHT 4LSO 4POLOG1Z3 FOR UND3R3ST1M4T1NG H1M BUT TH4T’S B3TW33N TH3 TWO OF YOU  
CG: OK, NOW YOU HAVE JUST GONE OFF YOUR ROCKER.  
GC: WHY?  
GC: FOR 4LL TH4T TH3 TWO OF YOU 4R3 SO V3RY D1FF3R3NT YOU DO SH4R3 SOM3 SURPR1S1NG TR41TS W1TH VR1SK4  
GC: 1N HOW 3V3RYTH1NG 1N TH3 3ND H4S TO B3 YOUR DO1NG  
GC: 4ND OTH3R P3OPL3 DON’T 3V3N H4V3 4NY 4G3NCY OF TH31R OWN  
GC: WH1CH 1N G4MZ33’S C4S3 1S 3XTR4 1NT3R3ST1NG B3C4US3 YOU DON’T 3V3N KNOW WH4T H3 CHOS3 TO DO ON H1S OWN 4ND WH4T H3 W4S FORC3D TO DO 4G41NST H1S W1LL  
GC: 4ND HOW MUCH FUCK3D UP SH1T W4S DON3 TO H1M 1N TH4T T1M3  
CG: YOU ACTUALLY EMPATHIZE WITH HIM?  
GC: 1 DO Y34H WHY WOULDN’T 1?  
CG: BECAUSE HE FUCKING ABUSED YOU!!  
GC: SO? 1 S41D 3MP4TH1Z3 NOT P1TY  
GC: 1 KNOW WH4T H3 D1D TO M3 1’M NOT L1K3LY 3V3R TO FORG3T  
GC: BUT 1 4LSO KNOW WH4T H4PP3N3D TO H1M MOR3 CL34RLY TH4N 4NYON3 3LS3 4PP4R3NTLY  
GC: 4ND 1 4LSO KNOW WH4T 1 D1D TO H1M  
CG: NO NO NO NO  
CG: OH GOD TEREZI PLEASE DON’T THINK WHAT HE DID WAS YOUR FAULT.  
GC: 4ND TH3R3 YOU GO 4G41N  
GC: >:|  
GC: H3R3 HOW 4BOUT TH1S FOR 4N 1D34:  
GC: WH4T 4 P3RSON DO3S 1S TH31R OWN F4ULT  
GC: NOTH1NG ON3 P3RSON CHOS3S TO DO 1S 4NOTH3R P3RSON’S F4ULT  
GC: WH4T H3 D1D BY H1MS3LF 1S NOT MY F4ULT OR YOURS BUT H1S  
GC: 4ND WH4T 1 D1D 1S M1N3 4ND WH4T YOU D1D 1S YOURS  
GC: SO HOW 4BOUT W3 JUST ST1CK TO 4POLOG1Z1NG FOR TH1NGS W3 4CTU4LLY D1D?  
CG: FUCK… JUST… YEAH  
CG: I STILL WISH I COULD HAVE PREVENTED ALL THAT.  
GC: SO DO 1  
GC: SO DO 4LL OF US 1’M SUR3  
CG: YEAH…  
CG: BUT I STILL DON’T UNDERSTAND… ON LOFAF. WHY HE DID WHAT HE DID.  
GC: TO B3 QU1T3 HON3ST W1TH YOU N31TH3R DO 1 3X4CTLY  
GC: S33 3V3N W1TH MY POW3RS S3V3R3LY CLOUD3D L1K3 TH3Y W3R3 1 COULD ST1LL KNOW W1TH SOM3 PR3C1S1ON WH4T P3OPL3 W3R3 MOT1V4T3D BY  
GC: 1 C4N’T R34D M1NDS 3V3N NOW BUT 1 C4N S33 TH3 P4THS TH4T P3OPL3 D3C1S1ONS T4K3 TH3M B4S3D ON TH31R THOUGHTS  
GC: W1TH H1M 1T 1S F4R L3SS 4 M4TT3R OF WH4T H3 D3C1D3S 1N TH1NK1NG  
GC: H3 JUST 4CTS ON WH4T H3 F33LS 4ND H3 M4K3S OTH3RS DO TH3 S4M3  
GC: 1F 1 H4D TO GU3SS TH4T 1S WH4T M4K3S H1M 4 B4RD 4ND TH4T 1S 4LSO WH4T M4K3S TH3 B4RD 4 P4SS1V3 D3STROY3R CL4SS  
GC: BUT BY TH3 T1M3 H3 WOK3 UP FROM TH3 M1ND CONTROL ON LOF4F 4LL H3 W4S F33L1NG W4S R4G3  
GC: 4ND 1 DON’T JUST M34N TH4T H3 W4S 4NGRY  
GC: 1T W4S L1K3… 1 LOOK3D 4T H1M 4ND 1 COULD NOT S33 H1M 4T 4LL  
GC: WH3N YOU RUSH3D H1M YOU W3R3 MOR3 4NGRY TH4N 1 H4D 3V3R S33N YOU BUT YOU W3R3 CL34RLY ST1LL TH3R3 4ND YOUR M1ND W4S ST1LL YOUR OWN  
GC: H1S W4SN’T H3 W4S TH3R3 SOM3WH3R3 BUT B3TW33N TH3 R4G3 4ND TH3 JUJU TH3R3 W4S V3RY L1TTL3 L3FT  
GC: NO ON3 1 KNOW C4N F33L L1K3 TH4T  
CG: JUJU?  
GC: Y3S K4RK4T TH3 JUJU  
GC: TH3 ON3 H3 TR13D TO T3LL YOU 4BOUT  
GC: TH3 CR34TUR3 OF H4TR3D 4ND PURPOS3 H3 C4LL3D H1S ONLY FR13ND  
GC: NOTH1NG 4BOUT TH4T W4S 4 CO1NC1D3NC3 BY TH3 W4Y  
GC: SO 1F YOU W4NT TO KNOW WHY H3 K1LL3D YOU 1’M 4FR41D YOU 4R3 GO1NG TO H4V3 TO 4SK H1M  
CG: LIKE FUCK ARE YOU TELLING ME TO TALK TO HIM!  
GC: 4ND Y3T H3R3 1 4M T3LL1NG YOU TO T4LK TO H1M  
GC: BUT YOU COULD 4LSO T4LK TO F3F3R1 F1RST 1T S33MS SH3 H4S T4K3N 4N 1NT3R3ST 1N H1M  
CG: YEAH, SHE IS WATCHING HIM.  
CG: I SET UP A ROTATION OF PEOPLE CALLING HER AT INTERVALS TO MAKE SURE SHE’S OK.  
GC: H4H4H4 OF COURS3 YOU D1D!  
GC: WH4T H4PP3N3D TO ‘1’M NOT TH3 L34D3R 4NYMOR3’?  
CG: I’M NOT! BUT EVERYONE SEEMED FAR TO FUCKING FINE WITH LEAVING HER ALONE WITH HIM.  
CG: I HAD TO DO SOMETHING!  
GC: *F4C3P4LM*  
CG: WHAT?  
GC: WH4T D1D W3 JUST T4LK 4BOUT? L1K3 L1T3R4LLY T3N M1NUT3S 4GO?  
GC: YOU C4N ST1LL SCROLL UP 4ND R34D 1T  
GC: 1N F4CT WHY DON’T YOU JUST PR1NT TH1S OUT 4ND H4NG 1T ON YOUR W4LL  
GC: 4G41N W1TH TH3 UND3R3ST1M4T1NG!  
GC: F3F3R1 1S NOT 4CTU4LLY STUP1D  
GC: 4ND STRONG 3NOUGH TO W1P3 TH3 FLOOR W1TH 4NY ON3 OF US  
GC: YOU DO KNOW TH4T R1GHT?  
CG: WHAT? YEAH, OF COURSE I KNEW THAT!  
CG: BUT I STILL DON’T GET WHY I SHOULD TALK TO HIM.  
CG: AFTER EVERYTHING HE DID, WHY WOULD I SUDDENLY GIVE A FUCK IF HE’S MISERABLE?  
GC: B3C4US3 MR OBL1V1OUS P4NTS 1 N3V3R TOLD YOU TO C4R3 4BOUT HOW H3 1S F33L1NG 1 JUST TOLD YOU TO T4LK TO H1M  
GC: BUT 1 DO H4PP3N TO C4R3 1F YOU 4R3  


\-- gallowsCalibrator [GC] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG] \--  



	22. Maps made by Stars

John was sitting with Dave on the balcony. They had dragged out two deck chairs and a small table and were now both reclining back as far as the chairs would go and looked up at the stars.

“Don’t they look strange to you though?” John asked.

“Yeah,” Dave said after a while, “I mean, I never gave much thought to them back then, and anyway I could never see that many, being in the middle of a bright ass city and all, but… we should be able to see some constellations, shouldn’t we?”

“We definitely should. This isn’t the best spot for stargazing either, but it has little enough light pollution and I could always see the brighter ones from here at night. Sometimes I could even see the milky way!”

“Yeah, right, the whole astronomer phase, I remember. Didn’t you even have a telescope?”

“I did! Man, I used to love looking at the stars back then and dad showed me all the constellations. It sucks that they’re gone.”

“One of the things we didn’t get back, I guess. Can’t have everything, right? And stars are a pretty small price to pay for what seems to be the win state to end all win states.”

“Heh, yeah. But it does make me wonder where we are. I mean, where the earth is. This is a brand new universe, so maybe this isn’t even the milky way…”

“So it’s just some other galaxy, can’t see it making much of a difference.” Dave said, reaching for the second pack of aj.

“Nah, it doesn’t really, it’s just weird. How can this be home if it isn’t even a place we have been too before?”

“Yeah, well, I suppose home is just were you hang your shitty katana on the wall, isn’t it?”

“Haha, right on!” John laughed. That certainly was one definition.

“Also you can always learn about the new ones now. Human pattern recognition basically guarantees that they have some here too.”

“Probably, yeah. Now come to think of it…” Gripped by a sudden thought, John jumped up and dashed inside to the living room, where Jade and Jane where watching TV.

“Hey, do we have a TV-magazine?” he asked them before he had even come down all the stairs.

“I think so, why?” Jane said without looking up..

“Something just occurred to me.” John started rifling through the TV cabinet. He found an old magazine from a few months ago and brought it back to the couch and started to page through it. Dave came down the stairs too and Jane leaned over far enough to look over John’s shoulder.

“So, what are you looking for?” She asked and they both gasped when he reached the last page.

“What? What is it?” Jade asked and tried to lean over too. “Oh…”

John looked up slowly from the page to Dave, who was standing next to the sofa with a raised eyebrow.

“Dave…” he asked, “would you like me to read your horoscope?”

“Huh, alright, lay it on me. What do the stars say about my love life?”

John began to read. “Time: consider well what lies within your responsibility and what does not.”

Dave raised both eyebrows and John went on. “Life: The care of others should not always take precedent over your care for yourself. Space: You can only run so far. Things will catch up to you eventually. Breath: Let friends bring you down to earth again from time to time. Light: If you gamble on your own future, consider that you may not know all outcomes.”

“Wow…” Jade said, “well we could have seen that coming.”

“But what does this mean? And why do they have to be so fucking ominous?” John asked.

Dave tilted his head and hummed. “This is some weird, ominous shit for sure. Also I think I should go.”

“What?” “Why?” Jane and John asked in near unison.

“I want to check on Rose. I’m not saying I have a bad feeling about this, because we all know how that ends, but, basically, I have a bad feeling about this.”

“What, because of what a stupid horoscope said? You know these are bullshit, right?” John said.

“Yeah, obviously,” Dave answered, “But it just reminded me… Why was Rose not here for our signalling shenanigans, did she say?”

Jade frowned slightly. “She just said she was busy. But she seemed fine at the time.”

“I’m not saying she isn’t fine, what with having her troll gf back and everything. I just want to check.”

Jane got up from the couch, saying, “alright then, that’s probably a good idea. Here, take the leftover muffins! That is if you can keep from eating them on the way!”

“I make no promises. Your muffins are the shit!”

They both disappeared into the kitchen, leaving John and Jade alone. John sat down on the sofa. “Well…” she said, “should we go too? Continue the reunion at Rose’s house.”

“No, I think I’ll stay here with Jane. Call me crazy, but I kinda think I should keep an eye on her? Also we need to keep Equius from bumping into a wall and bringing the house down.”

Jade laughed. “Yeah, you do that. I think I’ll get going too though, see that Jake doesn’t depopulate my island. Also there are things I need to check on there.”

“Alright then, let’s get you some food packed as well.” He started to get up but then changed his mind and wrapped his arms around her instead.

“It’s been nice having you visit.” He mumbled into her shoulder, “will you come again?”

She just chuckled and squeezed him hard. “Sure I will. Everyone will be fine, you’ll see!”

They separated again and followed the others into the kitchen. Time to pack up for two long flights.


	23. The houses we built

Dave flew high and swift, almost up against the clouds, and watched the land roll on beneath him. He avoided all but the smallest settlements and gave all cities as wide a berth as he could, so all he saw for miles and miles were the endless wheat fields of the country, just interspersed here and there by grass pastures and the occasional lonely farm. From up on high, it looked like a chessboard.

Going as fast as he could it still took him many hours till he spotted the wooded hills he was looking for and the huge gray mansion that lay at the end of a long, winding road. As he approached he was surprised to find a large truck parked in front of the main door and two men who where unloading boxes. Dave went to ground behind a bend in the road, scuffed his shoes in the dirt a bit and then approached the house on foot. When he came into view, both men spotted him and stopped in their tracks.

“Hey, boy!” one of them called, “Are you lost? This is private property!”

“Oh, hello,” Dave answered nonchalantly, “Yes, I know. This is Lalonde’s house, I’m here to visit her.”

“How did you get here?”

“I hitch hiked and then walked, of course,” Dave said and both men frowned at him, slightly suspicious, looking him over. “But what are you doing?” Dave asked, walking up and inspecting one of the large, brown cardboard boxes.

“Food delivery, standing order. Say, could you sign for this? The lady isn’t answering the door.”

“What? Oh yes, sure.” Dave said and signed the proffered delivery sheet. Then he took out his phone and pinged Rose’s pesterchum. A short while after the door buzzed and Dave held it open for the men as they started to carry the boxes inside. Dave noted that they just carried them through the door and did not enter further than they absolutely had to. After they were done they nodded to him and then hurried off.

Dave found himself standing alone in the huge living room and looked around. The place looked meticulously clean and also devoid of wizards. It was also completely silent and almost felt like a library, Dave thought, as he felt the compelling urge to be as quiet as possible himself. It did not surprise him that the delivery men did not like the house. It was eerie. Shaking off the feeling he stomped as noisily as possible on his way up to Rose’s room. 

“Hey, Rose!” he called as he opened her door with an attempted flourish, only to narrowly avoid smacking himself in the face with it as it jammed a few inches in on something.

“Oh, wait a second!” Rose called from inside and Dave heard some shuffling and the rustling of paper. He tried the door again and it opened smoothly. The room was a mess. Every available surface was covered in books, newspapers, magazines and handwritten notes. The walls where also lined with paper, hand and machine written, and many pictures of strange creatures. Rose was kneeling on the floor, sorting through the stack of now crumpled newspapers that had been blocking the door.

She was wearing a long black skirt and a pink top and was immaculately made up, but Dave thought she looked very pale underneath and her eyes kept flickering around the room at intervals. Dave tried to catch and hold eye contact through his shades, but she just turned away from him again and moved a stack of books from the chair to the bed and gestured for him to sit down. Once seated, he looked around the room again, trying to discern any pattern in the chaos.

“You know the delivery guys probably think you’re a witch or something? The entrance hall was actually less spooky with all the shitty wizards around. And then I find you here, buried in paper like some mad recluse scientist.”

Rose smiled, slightly strained. “I’m a single lady living alone in a huge spooky mansion. I have appearances to maintain.”

“Ok, so, how have you been?” Dave asked.

“Oh, fine, I’m fine! Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Rose, right now you are about as subtle as a fifty ton weight dropping on an unsuspecting cartoon dog. What’s up?”

“Nothing, really,” she answered, waving her hand dismissively. It was shaking, ever so slightly, “it’s just interesting. The food order, I didn’t place it. Yet it is set to come once a month, is completely paid for by a source that remains unidentified and I am not authorized to change it in any way.”

“You tried ordering booze.”

“No! I didn’t try. I just wanted to know if I could, you know?”

“Ok then. I’m glad you can’t.”

“Yes, So am I.” Rose rose up from the floor and stretched half heartedly before slumping down on her bed, ignoring the paper that was in the way.

“But it still sucks.” Dave half asked, half assumed.

“Yes.” Rose said, very quietly.

“Shit, I’m sorry about this, Rose. If I had paid more attention on the meteor…”

Rose looked up suddenly and met his gaze fully for the first time. “No one was paying attention to anything on the meteor. And as far as not paying attention to anything went, I was always the first in line, with blinkers on my eyes and a bottle in each hand. You shouldn’t beat yourself up about it. Well, any more than you are going to anyway. Any more than we all are right now.”

“The fact that not paying attention was all the rage those days doesn’t count as an excuse. Striders are not supposed to go with the trends.” He smiled a bit at the shitty joke, but Rose did too.

“But seriously,” he started again, “are you going to be ok? Like, withdrawal wise? Should we maybe get you to a doc or something?”

“Ah, no, that won’t be necessary. I believe it is very mild as these things go. And it’s not like it can kill me anyway, being about as far from just or heroic or meaningful as one can possibly get. It will pass.”

“So how long has this been going on?”

“Pretty much since I first came home.”

“And you didn’t think to say anything, at any point?”

“No, why would I? As I said, it’s not dangerous.”

“I’m not talking about it being dangerous, I’m talking about how much it must suck to do this alone!” Dave exclaimed, his voice rising dangerously close to really losing its cool. “Sometimes Rose, when your friends are a bunch of idiots that have the empathy of a sack of bricks, you need to tell them! Us! You need to tell us…” He swallowed hard and forced his voice back down to a normal level. Rose was staring at him in surprise.

“It’s fine Dave,” she insisted, “I’m going to be fine. Also you are here now and you can help me with all this,” she gestured around the room, “If you are still intent on guilt tripping yourself, you can consider this your penance.”

Dave chuckled, half in gratitude and half in a genuine new worry. “Okaaay… Then what the fuck am I looking at? Before I get into paper hell, what are you doing here, exactly?”

“I thought you’d never ask!” Rose said, jumping up from the bed.

Before she could launch into her explanation though, Dave got up from his chair, stepped up to her slowly and wrapped his arms around her. She still startled at that, but hugged him back eventually. Her skin felt clammy and warm, and he could feel a slight, but bone deep shiver running along her spine.

“I should have done this a long fucking time ago, Rose. I know you think this is all terribly uncool and not worth talking about, but I’m here now, ok? Just… I dunno, know that, I guess?”

She sighed against his shoulder. “I know that, Dave,” she whispered hoarsely, “now let me do the explaining, before we get our collective uncool all over one another.”

“You got it!” He said and slowly drew back from her. She still looked far to pale and unsteady, but at least the flickering in her eyes seemed to have let up a bit.

She cleared her throat. “Alright. What I am trying to do here is get a clear picture of this world’s mythological framework across all cultures, as well as their histories. I haven’t been too systematic about it, as you can see, and now I’m trying to sort my findings. Which is where you come in.” She shot him a sly glance and he sighed.

“Oh wow, put the system back into the chaos, got it. But where did you get all this stuff?” He asked

“Well, there is little one can’t do with a credit card that is as impressive as it is mysterious. It turns out even libraries deliver if you offer to fund them well enough. This house also has a quite respectable library in the cellar, in place of the not so respectable collection of alcoholic beverages it used to have.”

“Wow, ok. Look, I hate to rag on a ragged topic, but what happened to the stash? Did you actually throw it all out?”

“No, I did not have to. There was never any alcohol here. And ragged topic or no, that is an interesting observation that definitely goes on the list.”

“The list of impossible things?”

“No. The list of strangely benevolent things,” she said and started clearing a space up against the free wall.

“Huh, yeah, I think I have an item for that one too. I mean besides our unlikely survival and the restoration of our homes. When I found it, my kitchen was not only full of actual food for the first time, it literally had like a months worth of AJ stashed in the cupboards.”

“Exactly. John and Jade and several of the trolls report similar findings. We all seem to have received gifts of things we either needed or really wanted to have. Or not to have, in my case.”

“Hm. But since when has the game cared about things like that?”

“I don’t believe that this is the game’s doing. Whatever caused these things to appear and disappear showed benevolence that exceeds the providence of necessity and goes well into the realm of simple indulgence in many cases.” Having cleared the floor, she started rifling through papers on the desk.

“But it also took Jade’s awesome stuff,” Dave said, looking over her shoulder at a stack of pulpy astrology magazines.

“Yes. The only explanation I can think of in that case is that it was attempting to maintain the technological state of this civilization. Jade’s technology, if stolen or sold, would create significant technological upheaval.”

“So did your rifling through mythology turn anything up about that?”

“No, not directly, but there are several other interesting tidbits. Now, for the sorting,” she indicated the free spot on the floor, “to the left we will start with the pile about major religious movements, next to it the minor ones, sects and cults, then come defunct religions and ancient mythologies, then come conspiracy theories and last but not least, astrology.”

“Astrology gets its own pile?”

“Yes. Have you seen this world’s zodiac?”

“I have, yeah, back at Egbert’s house. It was some ominous shit. I mean, it also went above and beyond the call of hitting really fucking close to home.”

“Well yes, they tend to do that now, especially for us personally of course. But if you have a zodiac with people born under “doom”, or “rage” I think we will have to deal with a little ominousness from time to time.”

“Lalonde, you are not kidding anyone here, you love this shit,” Dave laughed and Rose smiled. “That is just slander, Dave Strider. Now, get sorting!”


	24. technology, your friend and helper

It was late in the evening, but still stiflingly warm when Jake came back to the house from the day’s hunting expedition. Well, he called it a hunting expedition, but really the island had nothing to hunt. The local fauna consisted mainly of colorful, friendly birds and rabbits and the most dangerous thing Jake had encountered was a snake, and that had been barely as long as his arm and in all likelihood not even poisonous. But still, that hadn’t stopped him from having a good time just running around among the trees, trying to get used to the feeling that there would be no monster here to jump out and try to eat him, and no robot to try and pummel him. Finding nothing to fight might just be alright, he thought. He was feeling very sweaty and tired and overall magnanimous towards life in general when he reached the door, only to hear his name being called from above.  


He looked up to see Jade floating down to him, grinning. “There you are!” She said, “Just in time too!”  


“Just in time for what?” He asked cautiously. He felt silly about it, but he was still a bit nervous around her. She seemed to be perfectly nice, a lot like he remembered her from her letters actually, but many things had happened since then. And well, it was not all that easy getting used to not living alone.  


She landed gracefully next to him and opened the door, leading the way inside. “Remember when I promised you a mystery? Well, we are getting to the bottom of one now. That is, if you want…” she hesitated and turned to look at him. “Are you alright? You look really sweaty.”  


“Oh yes, I am quite alright, thank you for asking.” He hated the way his voice squeaked a bit at the end there, “I was just out all day, you know, exploring the island.”  


“Oh!” she said, walking up the stairs in front of him, “of course. Did you find anything?”  


“No, not really. There are no monsters on this island. No robots, either.”  


She laughed. “No, nothing like that, I promise. They didn’t even give me my dreambot back.”  


“Ah, I think I might be happy about that though? I mean, not about your robot, of course, just about the fact that I don’t have to fight them anymore. Robots in general, I mean…”  


“Jake,” she said, still laughing, “are you rambling at me?”  


“No!” he protested and then fell silent. He would need to watch out for that. “But you haven’t told me what it is we are doing now.”  


They had reached the second landing under Jade’s room and she stopped in front of the transportaliser. She pulled out a very large prybar from her sylladex and gave him a huge grin. “We are doing science!” She proclaimed and began working the hook under the transportaliser plate.  


Jake took several steps back in alarm. “Jade!” he tried to protest, “Do you know what you are doing?”  


“No,” she replied, still grinning, “that’s why it’s called science!” The transportaliser gave a worrying creak.  


“So how do you know it won’t explode on us if you break it? This is hardly prudent behavior!”  


“And that is also why it is called science. Now stop worrying and help me.”  


Jake cautiously stepped up to the crowbar and took a hold of it. Jade had succeeded in wedging it under the transportaliser plate and was now trying to force the bar down to lever the thing out of the floor. Jake was pretty sure that Jade was stronger than him, as well as heavier, but still he did his best and with a final “heave ho!” the prybar gave way beneath them with a loud crack and they both tumbled to the floor, knocking their heads together painfully.  


After moments of groaning and rubbing sore foreheads they both looked over their handiwork. The top part of the transportaliser had come clean off the ground, revealing itself as the lid of another stone plate that fit inside it like a shallow jar. It was hollow, but empty.  


Jade grumbled something under her breath and took out her phone, calling up Roxy’s handle on pesterchum. Jake shuffled away from her till he could lean against the banisters and before doing the same.  


\-- gardenGnostic [GG] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] \--  
\-- golgothasTerror [GT] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG] \--  


GG: roxy?  
GT: Roxy are you there?  
GT: Please come in.  
TG: yeah im here. wazzup homies?  
TG: hows the weather on the home planet?  
GG: the weather is fine with a chance of broken transportalisers…  
TG: its pretty much the same over here.  
TG: i advanced up to stone slabs, but thats about the extent of my mad skillz  
TG: when Sollux gets home hes gonna lose his shit over all this stuff cluttering up his flat…  
TG: but you really broke a transportaliser?  
GT: We did yeah.  
TG: why?  
GG: we were doing science!  
GG: turns out the ones here are just stone slabs  
GG: i expected wires and circuits and weird magic stuff!  
GG: but its just a stone container.  
GG: containing stone  
TG: really? hm…  
TG: thats interesting  
TG: this could mean that the technology they used to contain is gone, or that this is all they ever where…  
GG: wouldnt it have to be the latter though?  
GG: how did they work anyway?  
GT: Maybe by magic?  
GG: magic isnt actually a thing you know  
GT: That is an interesting statement by someone who can fly.  
GG: but thats not magic! thats just a godtier ability. you can fly too you know even if you insist on running everywhere  
TG: hmmmmm…  
GG: but magic or no the transportalisers probably worked because of an ability the game gave them  
GT: But the games gone now for good right?  
GG: we think so. but seeing as how our powers remain largely intact, minus the influence of the green sun of course, id say that it still has to be present in some sense  
TG: HMMMMM…  
GT: What is it roxy?  
TG: just something that occurred to me. i mean zapping people from point a to b, what does that remind you of?  
GG: john!  
TG: apart from john I mean  
GG: then what should it remind us of?  
TG: me dummy! i can do that!  
GT: Really? Then why dont you just get back here?  
TG: i cant. or at least i think I cant. every time I did that i had very limited range  
TG: also its not really zapping its more a case of dis and reappearing. appearifying  
TT: Guys, what she is trying to say is that the transportaliser is a voidy thing.  
TT: To use vernacular I recently picked up from an obnoxious source.  
TG: hi ar!  
TG: thanks so much for the clarification  
GT: AR!?  
TT: Oh. Hello Jake.  
GT: What on gods green earth produced you from the void?  
TT: Ah, I would assume the same thing that produced you.  
TT: It’s nice to speak to you again, by the way.  
GT: Ok could you be so kind as to cut the bullcrap?  
TT: You mean that? Alright, I will.  
TT: Jake: Message Dirk. Do not go through me, do not collect 200 boonbucks.  
GT: What?  
TT: Step one in cutting the bullcrap is in my case: stop covering for my bioversion’s bullcrap.  
TT: I believe he might not have called you. He may think he doesn’t want to speak to you. But as we have established, we are now in full on bullcrap-cutting mode.  
TT: If you want to be the first to jump onto this sparkly new bandwagon, you will call him.  
TT: Right now, while those of us with less bullcrap to deal with instead deal with the voidy thing.  
TT: In fact, you know what?

\-- timeusTestified [TT] blocked golgothasTerror [GT] \--

Jake slowly lowered his phone in the same time it took him to close his mouth again. Then he just sat and stared at it for a while before becoming aware that Jade had stopped typing and was also staring at him. He felt his ears grow hot and scowled pointedly at the phone instead of at her before getting up and absconding up the stairs. First, he would take a nice, long shower. Then he would think about what he could say. Then he would consider calling Dirk. Or maybe just going to bed instead. But even that decision could currently wait until he got all the sweat and mud and thoughts washed off.


	25. and be it ever so eerie...

Roxy lowered her phone and rubbed at her eyes. Well then. The whole thing did seem to make sense and she felt like she really could have thought of this sooner. Well, maybe not. She had never really given much thought to the origins of the countless small impossibilities that just came with the game, just as she had always tried not to think about the impossibilities that had come with her life prior to it.  


She looked up and over to Sollux, who was just sitting at his keyboard and typing away a mile a minute, completely ignoring her. He had not in fact lost much of his shit when he had come home to find his hive littered with green cubes, stone slabs and a few choice in between items. All he had done was grunt in irritation and make straight for his computer, where he had sat down two hours ago now and not moved. In her time with him, he had always been rather taciturn, but lately that tendency was increasing, she thought. On the first evening they had had a very pleasant and long discussion about comparing programming languages and logic until the sun had tinted the horizon yellow again, but now he seemed increasingly unwilling to acknowledge her and when Aradia dropped by she received largely the same treatment.  


She had said that he got like that sometimes, and to not take it personally. Roxy didn’t really, in fact it was a bit of a relief not to have to talk every day, but it still made her feel even more alien and homesick. Despondently, she picked up one of the green cubes and turned it around in her hands until to her surprise, Sollux stopped typing and spun his chair around to her.  


“So…” he said, “what’s the deal with all of those cubes anyway? Sure as shit gonna get some weird ass stares from the garbage collector drone when we throw those out.”  


“Yeah… I gather very few drones appreciate the beauty of perfect genericism.”  


He lifted one corner of his mouth into a strange sort-of smile “Is that what they are? Perfectly generic?”  


“I suppose so. At least, that’s what Jade told me. I get them when I don’t have a clear enough idea of what I’m making.”  


He came over to her and picked up one of the cubes. “So, what’s the deal here? What are you trying to do anyway?”  


“I’m trying to make a transportaliser. I guess it should be easy. I just need to…” She lifted her hands again and concentrated as hard as she could. She could sense the nothingness under her hands and around them, the emptiness inherent in the thing she wanted… There was a soft plop, and then a loud clonk in front of her, and when she looked, there was a round stone slab with the familiar transportaliser markings on it. It was also faintly green. Sollux was staring at it.  


“Well, that looks… close?” he said.  


“Yeah, sorta.” She said. “It doesn’t work, though. It’s just an image. I can make all kinds of inert things, inert is easy, it’s the transporting part that’s hard.”  


“Yeah, that figures. Can’t say that the whole thing doesn’t sound suspiciously like magic bullshit to me.”  


“It’s not magic, exactly. It’s just a voidy thing.”  


“Same difference. But can’t you work in steps? Like, make an image and then attach the function?”  


“Huh. Yeah, I could try that.” Roxy ran her fingers over the markings on the slab. “It’d be like… taking the nothingness out of a function of nothing. The ultimate zero sum operation.”  


Sollux showed more of his teeth in a fuller smile. “You know that making it sound like logic doesn’t make it any less magic bullshitty, right?”  


“Hey,” she protested, smiling too, “don’t knock the bullshit till you’ve tried it! Here, let me do this again…”  


Roxy closed her eyes and put both hands over the slab. It was not the object, it was just the function of the object that did not exist. The function was nothing, the function addressed it’s variable to zero, storing it in the void and addressing it to existence again… back… home…  


The void stood before her like a vast gulf, swirling with black shadows between her and home, between here and earth, between what she could do and what she could not, and slowly Roxy reached out into it, inching her hand further and further into the blackness. Then she closed her fist and yanked.  


After a long moment, the darkness receded and she opened her eyes again. Her ears where ringing and her head was single, throbbing pain and she slumped forward and sideways, lying down next to the stone with an anguished groan.  


“Holy shit…” she heard Sollux mutter and then the shuffling of feet as he left the room. She just continued to lie on the floor, calming her breathing until he came back to her, crouching down next to her head. She blinked her eyes open again, squinting against the brightness of his hive, to find a glass of water standing in front of her and two white pills in a bony gray hand. She sat up a bit and took them.  


“It’s acetylsalicylic acid,” he said, very quietly, “I think it should work for humans too.”  


“Yeah, it does, thanks.” She downed both pills at once with the water and sat up fully to lean against the wall. “Ouch.” She said and concentrated on her breathing and not throwing up for a while. When her head had stopped spinning she looked around again. Sollux was back in his chair and looking at her with a frown that looked suspiciously like concern. Then she looked at the transportaliser. It still looked flat and greenish, but the pale markings were now emitting a faint yellow glow.  


“So…” Sollux asked, “did it work?”  


“Huh, I haven’t the faintest,” Roxy answered, “why don’t we find out?”  


“Wait!” Sollux exclaimed, half rising from his chair in alarm, “don’t just get on that thing jesus christ, how pants shittingly stupid can you be?”  


Roxy laughed out loud and winced, quickly regulating down to a chuckle that didn’t threaten to split her skull.  


“I’m not going to do that! You really think I am that dumb? No, we are getting the scientific method all up in this bitch!”  


She took out her phone.  


\-- tipsyGnostalgic [TG] opened memo on the FRUITY REUNION RUMPUS BOARD --  


TG: alright everyone listen up  
TG: this is the time for sciense!  
TG: *science  
TG: sorry i have a splitting headache over here  
TG: on accounts of me being the very best voidy person of them all  
GG: hello roxy! any luck with the transportaliser?  
TG: yes as a matter of fact i have all the luck with the damned things  
GG: does that mean you can come home now?  
TG: well only science can tell  
TG: so i am now going to transportalise a perfectly generic object  
TG: and i need you folks to tell me where it ended up  
TG: and in what state  
TG: that last part is impoooortant  
GG: righty-ho! but we dont have one here…  
TG: casa de strider also remains transportaliser free  
GG: but we have one! hold on, we are moving down to the one we didnt break  
TT: so am i  
TG: alright then here goes!!  


Roxy grabbed a green cube and placed it on the plate, careful to quickly draw her hand away before it touched the surface. There was a flash of light and a quiet hiss of air being displaced, and then only a faint curl of smoke rising from the empty stone slab. Roxy held her breath.  


TG: well?  
TG: where is it?  
TG: …  
TG: fuck why wont you answer?  
TG: guys?  
GG: oh sorry Roxy!  
GG: we were just running down the stairs  
GT: Its here! Roxy old girl you did it!  
TG: awesome! who is the very best?  
TG: it is meeeee!  
TG: but is it ok? unbroken o mean? no scorch marks or anything?  
GG: no, no scorch marks or anything.  
GG: here let me send you a picture  


\-- gardenGnostic [GG] sent file “perfectlygenericandawesome.png” -- 

Roxy opened up the file and grinned. It was indeed a green cube, exactly like she had sent it, held into the camera by Jade’s brown hand.  


TG: that is it guys!   
TG: brace yourselves, roxys on the move back home!  


Before she stepped on the plate she turned back to Sollux. “So, uh…” he stuttered, “are you going now?”  


“Yeah, I’m going home. Thank you for having me! And putting up with all this generic shit.” She gave a cube a little kick.  


“It was less than excruciatingly awful having you, Roxy.” He muttered and she laughed. Then she crossed the room to where he stood and drew him into a tight hug. A few sparks flew off his horns and he cursed. “What in the actual fuck!?”  


“It’s a hug, dumbass, deal with it!” she said and let him go again. He was distinctly yellow on the cheekbones and scowling. She just buffed his shoulder. “This isn’t the last you’ve seen of me, silly! I’ll visit you again, and write.”  


“Awesome! I can’t wait…” he grumbled, falling just a little short of the sarcasm he was aiming for. “Just… be careful, ok?”  


“I will!”  


She strode back over to the transportaliser, and before she could hesitate or really think about it, she gave him a little wave and hopped in the middle of the glowing symbol.  



	26. ...there is no place like home

Rose and Dave stood around the transportaliser, trying not to hold their breath. The silence stretched out, but nothing happened. Just as Rose went back to her phone and Dave took a breath to say something, there was a small flash. Nothing appeared, but the lines of the symbol were now glowing. Rose looked from the slab to Dave and back again.

“Interesting,” she said, “I wonder if this means-”

Before she could finish the thought, there was a second, much brighter flash and a clap like thunder, and Roxy was standing on the slab, blinking around in confusion. It didn’t take her long to get her bearings though, and as soon as she spotted Rose she jumped over to her and hug tackled her, knocking them both back a step. 

“Mom!” She exclaimed and clung to Rose, who returned the hug hesitantly. Then they both stood there, unwilling to let go, until Dave cleared his throat awkwardly.

“Uh, I think I should probably… go…” he said and tried to sidle past them, but Roxy let go of Rose and hugged him instead. He stiffened, but slowly reciprocated as well, and Rose laughed. Roxy let go again and turned back to her.

“I did it!” she exclaimed, “everyone say it with me now: Who’s the best?”

“Roxy’s the best,” Dave answered dutifully and smiled a bit. “Welcome back to earth, were we have cookies and apple juice. And transportalisers, apparently.”

“Hell to the yes!” Roxy looked around the room. “Though this isn’t where I expected to land. The cube got sent to Jade.”

“We’ll just put it on the list,” Rose said, “welcome home, in any case.”

“Soooo…” Roxy started slowly, suddenly uncertain, “is this my home then too? I mean, it sure was way back when, but…”

“I think this is the home meant for both of us, yes. It is certainly big enough. Is this how you remember it?”

“Well yes, more or less.” Roxy went over to the cupboards and opened one. “It contained a lot more booze when I lived here though.”

Rose flinched, just a little. “Yes, as did mine. It was removed for us, I believe, by whatever power that put us here.”

Roxy closed the cupboard again and fixed Rose with a thoughtful eye. “Good. That saves us an awful lot of smashed glass, am I right?”

Rose swallowed and nodded, feeling suddenly dizzy again. Roxy frowned at her. “Hey, are you ok?” She came over and put the back of her hand to Rose’s forehead and looked into her eyes. Maybe it was just the dizziness, but Rose suddenly felt a sickening wave of embarrassment wash over her and tried to turn away from the hand and that worried look. Roxy just drew her into another hug, preventing her escape, so Rose closed her eyes as Roxy whispered into her hair. “Woah, hey there, none of that now. It’s fine, it’s gonna be fine. I’ve been there, I know this shit, ok?”

Rose couldn’t find it within her to answer, but she did rest her chin on Roxy’s shoulder. It made the spinning slow down a little. When it passed she drew back again and Roxy let her go, but retained the hold of her right arm.

“Alright, come on, show me the rest of the house? I’m dying to see what you did with the old dump!”

Rose smiled a bit, hopefully not as wobbly as she felt and lead Roxy out of the room and into the hall, with Dave following some distance behind.

“I didn’t really do anything with it,” she admitted, indicated the decor-less living room, “I just kept to my room.” 

“Yeah, I did pretty much the same when I lived here. Shouldn’t we liven it up a little?”

“Hm, I guess.” Rose answered, feeling strangely subdued. She didn’t really fancy decorating again all that much. They all walked up to her, or their, old room and Rose had to give the door a good shove again to dislodge some paper that had fallen against it.

“I’m sorry about the mess! We were just sorting this, wait a second,” she hurried to clear some more space on the bed and the floor, but when she reached down, her hands started shaking again and she opted to sit down instead. Roxy and Dave both entered and Dave conscientiously busied himself with one of the stacks as Roxy looked around.

“Wow,” she said, “you’ve been busy! What are you researching?”

“Ah,” Rose said, grateful for the easy topic, “mythology. Namely the mythology that might tell us something about what people native to this continuum believe about its origins.”

“Cool!” Roxy said, “come on, explain!”

“Well, actually it just turned up bits and pieces here and there. The large, monotheistic religions of the old earth are largely intact, just with the interesting variation that the creator is mostly referred to as female.”

“Huh, interesting. This means we got like, all matriarchal and shit? Like the trolls?”

“No, not exactly. Traditionally the males still have the whole thing firmly under their thumb, especially in what could be called the predominant civilizations, to use ‘predominant’ in it’s most unfriendly and violent sense here.”

“Yeah, it figures. That’s humans for you.”

“I guess it is. Though I wouldn’t use that as an argument for the moral superiority of trolls, seeing as their matriarchy evolved from the same root of physical superiority in an era where that mattered, just like in ours.”

“Hm, I suppose. So what difference does it make?”

“The difference is, as always, in the details. Monotheism, then and now, evolved from the amalgamation of many individual faiths and traditions and thus has a very generic description of the deity. Other mythologies are often more specific. Here some speak of a female creator of great benevolence who overcame her satanic sibling at birth. She is said to love stories above all else and she is worshipped by telling your story to the stars. She also speaks to her prophets in their dreams, where she always appears in some sort of disguise, because she reportedly considers her own features to be hideous beyond bearing.”

Roxy considered that for a moment and then broke out into a wide grin. “Ooooh! That sounds familiar! That sounds very familiar indeed! Do you think it’s possible?”

“I do believe it’s possible, yes. But it goes on beyond that. See, the zodiac currently used by most cultures all over the world, not just the western ones, is based on the aspects. The mythology behind it tells stories about a caste of angelic beings who helped shape aspects of the world under the guidance of the creator goddess, and got immortalized in the stars as a reward.”

Roxy sat back and stared at her in stunned silence for a while. “So… that means we are like, Callie’s angels?”

Rose smiled. “In a sense, yes.”

“Wow… that’s, just… wow. I don’t even know what to say to that.”

“Yeah, it’s pretty much a bomb,” Dave butted in from the side, “it’s also completely hilarious. Like, what they say about us. It’s all so glowy and heroic and shit, the whole nine yards. Like, nowhere does it even mention a single thing about shitty movies, brain rotting jokes, made up swear words or that the Knight of Time once made the Knight of Blood draw dicks in a book… Or, you know, any of the other stuff.” Dave fell silent for a while and looked down at his papers again. “You know what, actually it’s not funny at all. It’s just fucked up.” He looked awfully young suddenly, and lost.

“Huh,” Roxy said, “they’re just legends, Dave. You know no one literally believes them, right?”

“Nah, I know,” he answered quietly, “this is just… I don’t even know man, it’s not funny.” 

“No, it’s not,” Rose agreed, “but I don’t think it was ever intended as a joke.”

Roxy looked from Rose to Dave and back again before coming to a decision. She got up and walked over to where Dave sat on the floor, hunched over the papers, and reached down to tug him up to his feet. He gave a little suppressed squeak of surprise, but got to his feet without protest. Then Roxy gripped him firmly by the shoulders and maneuvered him over to the bed and pushed him down beside Rose. Then she shooed them back against the wall, before climbing onto the other side of him and drew the blanket up and over their knees. Dave just looked baffled.

“What’s this going to be then when it’s done?”

“Welcome to the first Strider-Lalonde official sleepover party!” Roxy announced, “I believe we are all new to this, so we’ll just do what they do in the movies.” She then shuffled around a bit, shoving Dave against Rose’s side before settling in against his. He still looked like a deer caught in the headlights for a while, but bit by bit Rose could feel him relax against her until all three of them where comfortably slumped together. They kicked off their shoes over the edge of the bed and Dave sighed.

“Fine,” he said, “but you are not breathing a word of this to anyone.”

Roxy giggled. “Scout’s honor. What happens in a sleepover stays in the sleepover.”

“Still doesn’t clear us up on what the fuck we are supposed to do now.”

“Well,” Rose mused, “you know that line about how we are the adults now and we get to decide what that means? That is us now.”

“Just with universe-creating fucking hero-deities instead of adults?” Dave muttered sullenly.

Rose leaned her head back against the wall and half against his shoulder. “Yes. It doesn’t mean you have to do anything you don’t want to do. Or be someone you don’t want to be.” “Yeah, I get that” he said, “But it’s a hella steep curve to come down from. Or fall ass backwards off of, in some cases. I don’t even know what to do with that… Or what to do now that I know that.”

“Well, what do you wanna do?” Roxy asked.

“I don’t even know! What is there to do? I just wanted to go home and be some dude again! Make some beats, draw shit comics, complain about my asshole bro… Maybe even go back to school. You know, kid’s school that is for kids.”

“I never figured you for the type to like school, Dave,” Rose pondered.

“Yeah, well, that’s the point, isn’t it? I’m not. I hated it. But if I wasn’t the knight of a fucking cosmic aspect, that is what I would have to do.”

“Yeah, I think I get it,” Roxy said quietly, “I always wondered what school must have been like. Maybe we can go together?”

“Ha, yeah,” Dave said, “they couldn’t even handle our awesomeness.”

“Fuck yeah they couldn’t! We’d go to school just to be entirely to cool for it!” Roxy said and they fist bumped and sat in silence for a while until Rose spoke up again.

“So, Roxy. What do you want to do?”

“I think I might actually go to school. Or to college maybe, soon. Also I really want to try and meet Callie again? If we can find her out there somehow, that is.”

“I think you just might,” Rose said, “If anyone can, I do believe it’s going to be you. You and Jade. I gather they got on really well too.” She drifted off, searching for something else to say and failing. Anything to put off the inevitable next question.

“So…” Dave started carefully, sensing her discomfort, “what about you?”

Rose sighed deeply and let her head fall fully onto Dave’s shoulder. He wriggled around a bit until he got his arm around her, drawing her against him. She closed her eyes.

“What I really want to do,” she whispered, half hoping they couldn’t hear her, “is start to make amends. I want Kanaya to forgive me, and I want to help Terezi, who I failed. And even Gamzee… I made a promise to help them once that I broke. And you… I’m so sorry.”

She hid her face in Dave’s shoulder and fought against the stinging in her eyes until Roxy reached over and took her hand under the blanket, squeezing it tightly. They sat together like that for a long time and the silence stretched out into the room, but didn’t bother anyone.


	27. ==> Jane: Find a way out

It was early in the morning again and Jane had a headache. With Jade gone now she could at least stretch out over the whole bed, but the early dawn light was still shining way too brightly for her taste and she knew she couldn’t get back to sleep anyway. One of these days they would have to invest in some blinds. She was sure John wouldn’t be up for quite some time now, so there wasn’t any point in making breakfast, but she got out of bed and went downstairs into the kitchen anyway, out of habit. She crept past Equius who was still sleeping on the couch and apparently she wasn’t all that awake either because by the time she noticed something was off, she had already taken several steps into the brightly lit kitchen.  


John was standing at the stove, ingredients littered all around him, and he was just pouring batter into the sizzling pan. “Good morning, Jane!” he said, “look, I made breakfast.” He looked and sounded serious like she had seldom seen him and she suddenly had to fight the nerves out of her voice.

“It’s fine, John,” she said, “I’m really not that hungry this early in the morning.”

John turned his back on the stove and looked straight at her. “Yeah and that is a load of bull,” he said decisively, “when it comes to lunch you always say you had too much breakfast. And when it comes to dinner you say you have been snacking all afternoon. Which I also know is bull, because since Jade and Dave left the muffins stopped disappearing.”

Jane felt her heart drop into her shoes. John was still staring at her sternly and gestured to a chair with the spoon. “Sit down,” he said with such authority that for a second, Jane was sure it was Dad speaking to her and she was almost halfway down on the chair before she realized she was obeying.

“These are just plain pancakes,” he explained, pointing to the ingredients standing on the counter, “buttermilk, milk, eggs, flour, one quarter cup of butter, two spoonfuls of sugar. A lot simpler than those you make.”

Jane shoved her hands under her thighs and sat on them. “John…” she said, embarrassed to find her voice shaking, “what are you doing?”

John suddenly glared at her. “No! What are you doing? You think I don’t know a fucking self destruct when I see one? I may not understand it, but I sure as fuck didn’t miss it. I’m not that dumb and you are not that good at slight of hand.”

Jane flinched, and suddenly John’s expression softened again, suddenly making him look younger by years. “I’m sorry, Jane. I didn’t mean to… fuck. Just, do you even know how scary it is to watch something like this? Fucking god awful terrifying, is what it is.”

Jane just nodded dumbly. “Yeah. I know.” 

“Alright, of course you do. Would you please just work with me here? I have no fucking clue what I’m doing. I don’t even know what you are doing, or why. But I’m not just going to watch you do it.”

“Yeah.” Jane mumbled. Her headache was getting worse. “Can I just have some water, please?”

“Yeah, sure,” John said and filled a glass, putting it down in front of her. “I know this sucks. I know I’m kinda being the bad guy and I’m sorry about the ambush. For all I know, all I’m doing here is just putting my foot in it. Come to think of it I’m sure I’m just completely putting my foot in it… fuck.” Clearly frustrated, he turned back to the stove and flipped the pancake, still muttering.

Jane couldn’t help but smile a little. “John, you are starting to ramble.”

“Yeah, I am, sorry. Look, the pancakes are done. You… I’m not going to force you or anything. But could you eat at least one? Please? I’ll eat the others.”

Jane sighed, “yeah, ok. How many did you make?”

“I, ah, might have gotten carried away a little…” John opened the oven door, revealing the heaped plate he was keeping warm. Jane couldn’t help but laugh and John grinned too, sheepishly. 

“We’ll keep some for later,” she said, “if you eat all those you’ll get fat.” 

John’s smile fell instantly. “Is that what this is about? Jane, you really don’t need to lose weight. You know that, right?”

“No, it’s not that! Gosh, that’d be such a cliche.”

“And god forbid we ever encounter one of those,” John said, “what with us being the living embodiments of the hero’s journey and all.”

“It’s really not, though. Or well, it’s not just that.” She fell silent again as John gave her the last pancake he made, took one for himself and sat down at the table across from her. He didn’t say anything, just sprinkled cinnamon onto his and waited for her to continue.

“When I was under the tiara…” she started at last, “I don’t even remember much about it, you know? Just snippets here and there. I remember how it felt though. I didn’t need to eat or sleep and I didn’t even notice. I just didn’t feel it, or anything really,” she jabbed her pancake with her fork forcefully. “and being hungry and tired is like… being a lot more present, you know? Now when I eat it feels like I’m slipping back into that. It feels like doing what I don’t want to do, it feels so dirty…” her fork made an awful screeching noise on the plate and they both flinched. “Sorry,” she mumbled and then coughed to cover the break in her voice. She tried to get a bite, but her hand was shaking so badly it fell off again. She just stared at it and shuddered.

John didn’t say a word, but got up, dragged his chair next to hers and held out one arm. “Come,” he said quietly, “hugs now, pancakes later.” She looked up into his eyes, which were shimmering wetly. Something in her just snapped and she fell forward against him with a sob. He wrapped both arms around her completely, placing one large hand against the back of her head and holding her as she shook and cried against his collarbone. 

After a long while she felt her breathing evening out and the tears subside and she drew back, grimacing in embarrassment at the large wet spot on his shirt. “Sorry,” she mumbled, reaching for a paper towel and blowing her nose as quietly as she could. “I’m sorry, this is so stupid.”

“It’s really not though,” he said, sounding rather wobbly himself.

“It’s such a dumb thing to be doing,” she protested in frustration, “I’m sorry you have to deal with this, I’ll get a grip on it, I promise.”

“Yeah, you will,” he said, “and I’ll help you. Well, also I’ll be an idiot about it and put my foot in my mouth a lot, but what’s new.” 

She tried to smile at the joke, she really tried, but it just made her want to cry again. She was turning into such a mess, it really shouldn’t be this hard to pull herself together. She wanted to apologize again, but she had already done that and repeating herself there would not make it any less pathetic. She really needed to get John to back off till she got herself together again. Just as she was debating how to best get out of the kitchen now, he put his hand back on her shoulder and squeezed it.

“How about we put a few pancakes on a plate and watch a movie or something? Introduce Equius to some quality earth cinema?”

“Frick,” she cursed, rubbing at her eyes, “yeah, let’s do that.”

When they came out of the kitchen, the sofa was empty and they heard the shower running upstairs. Jane couldn’t help but wonder if he had heard any of that. John carried the plate of pancakes over and put it on the couch table when the doorbell rang. Jane took several steps towards it before remembering that she looked a mess and just looked to John who nodded and went to open the door while Jane stood aside. She saw him open the door and look around in confusion for a while, before something on the floor caught his attention. He bent down to pick it up and it seemed very heavy indeed. 

He stumbled a bit under the weight, but carried inside a large, flat brown box, which he put down carefully in the middle of the room.

“Huh,” he said, “no one at the door, just this. And boy it’s heavy.”

Jane got a knife from the kitchen and together they unpacked the box and then just stared at the contents. Inside was a large, circular stone slab with very familiar markings, glowing ever so slightly.


	28. ==> Equius: Be indecent

When Equius came down from his shower, he found the two humans sitting on the floor next to a glowing transportaliser. Jane was typing on her phone and John was looking over her shoulder, but they both looked up as he came down the stairs.

“Look!” Jane called cheerfully, “Roxy sent us a transportaliser! We still have to test if it works, but if it does you can go home!”

Equius felt his chest tighten. “Ah…” he said, “that is good news, yes…”

Jane handed the phone to John and stood up, approaching him. “Aren’t you happy about that? I thought you wanted to go back to your… moirail, was it?”

She looked suddenly doubtful and from up close and her eyes looked strangely red and swollen. Equius clenched his fists by his side.

“I don’t… actually know that.” He admitted quietly.

“But you have spoken to her, haven’t you?” She asked and he looked away.

“Equius, what have you been doing?”

“I had many others that required my attention. I just did not get around to it yet.”

“God dammit, Equius! That is so weak sauce, honestly.” She stood so close to him she had to lean her head back to scold him. “Now, when this thing works you are going straight to her! No more excuses. I will call you to check. Believe me, I know bad excuses when I see them.” She glared at him and he fidgeted. He knew that this was necessary, but still. The longer he could put it off, he thought, the longer he could maybe find the right words to say, eventually. Behind her, John put a piece of cardboard on the slab and it disappeared with a flash. Then he went back to typing on the phone. After a while, he got up too. 

“Alright,” he said, “you’re all set. This thing works. At least it works for cardboard. But it also worked for Roxy. You know what? Don’t listen to me, I’m in major rambling mode today. Just get on the slab.”

Equius sighed, trying to stop the shivering in his chest. This was it then. He really couldn’t stay any longer without being rude. Also it was true that he belonged back home, and that Nepeta deserved to hear his apology in person. So he straightened his shoulders and stepped up to the plateau. Before he got on though, he turned back to Jane.

“Thank you, Jane and John,” he said, “you have been most kind to me. I do hope we will meet again.”

Then he bowed again, because it seemed the right thing to do, and with a deep breath, he stepped onto the transportaliser.

He saw the familiar bright flash and felt the slight static shock and before he could even blink, he found himself standing on the other side. It was a lot darker than John’s house had been and he had to blink a few times before he got used to the dimness. He found himself standing in a very familiar cave. The walls were painted all over, everything was covered in furs and it was very warm. Two trolls were sitting across the cave from him on the floor, playing cards. When he appeared they both turned to him and stared in surprise.

Terezi looked terrible. She had bandages around her head and all the way up her arms where they disappeared under her shirt and the entire right side of her face was swollen and bruised. Nepeta on the other hand seemed thankfully unhurt, but she also looked a lot older than he remembered her, and her lips were not painted.

“Equius!” She exclaimed and leapt over Terezi to get him, jumping again and flying into his arms that he spread out reflexively to catch her. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and her legs around his waist and clung to him. The force of her impact nearly made him take a step back onto the transportaliser, but caught he himself in time, just swaying a little, and wrapped his arms around her as well. Her shoulders were shaking against his hands and he felt her sob against him.

“Nepeta?” he asked, suddenly concerned.

She hissed at him but didn’t move her head. “I was worried about you!” she punched his arm with a small fist, “why why why didn’t you call me?”

“Uh…” he said and then looked over to Terezi, who was watching the proceedings with a slight frown. She just shook her head at him. “I didn’t… Nepeta… I didn’t know if you wanted to speak with me.”

“What!?” She cried and let him go, dropping gracefully to the ground, glaring at him with wet eyes and baring her teeth. “What!?” There was a definite growl in her voice now and Equius felt like moving back from her. This was not what he expected, this had not been the plan. For a split second he thought about getting on the transportaliser again and immediately felt despicable for the impulse.

“Nepeta, please, I can explain.”

“This had better be good,” Terezi stage whispered from the side, but Equius tried to ignore her and get his jumbled thoughts in line in a hurry.

“I have to apologize. I know I did so before, but I can’t know if you remember, and you never said if you accepted my apology, or, well, me… I didn’t know if you had forgiven me, or if you would, and I was afraid. Again. I failed to protect you and he killed you. I don’t know if I even have the right to ask your forgiveness for something like that.”

Suddenly her entire stance changed. Her shoulders sagged and her hands dropped. “Equius…” she said, “that is not what happened at all. All this time you thought… you thought this was your fault?”

“It was my duty to protect you, and I failed. The highblood- Gamzee. He killed you because of me.”

Nepeta looked up at him with big eyes. “But Equius, you did protect me! You told me to stay in the room, and I deliberately disobeyed, just because I was curious! How can that possibly be your fault?”

Equius suddenly felt all the arguments leave him. He just felt cold and tired now, and without thinking how it must look, he sank down on both knees and bowed his head. 

“I did not fight him as I should have done,” he whispered. “I don’t even know why I didn’t. I knew he was going to kill me, I knew he was going to kill you too, but I just couldn’t raise a hand to him. It just felt so right that he should do as he pleased with me. And I don’t understand it anymore, how I could ever think that. Can I even ask you to forgive me?”

Slowly Nepeta came up to him again and knelt down as well until he was forced to meet her eyes. There were tears still on her cheeks, but she was smiling at him.

“Oh Equius,” she said, “Of course I forgive you, silly. And of course I want you back with me.” She reached out and put her hand on his cheek and he sagged forward until their foreheads touched. He fought the tears rising in his eyes and the sob that was threatening to take his breath away.

“Shoosh,” she whispered to him, “shoosh.”

“Alright, this is it,” Terezi declared from behind, “You get out the pale displays of indecency, I get myself out.” She got to her feet slowly, stretching her back and wincing slightly. Nepeta turned back to her, blushing. 

“Sorry about that Terezi…” she said.

“Nah, it’s fine, I get it. But there are people on the other side of this thing I’d like to meet too. I’ll be back, don’t worry.” She and Nepeta both smiled, and then she stepped onto the transportaliser and was gone.

“Ah, I didn’t mean to drive her away…” Equius said and Nepeta turned back to him and frowned.

“And there you go again. Always blaming yourself for everything. It’s starting to make my head hurt you know.”

Equius fiddled with the hem of his shirt. Her reactions were starting to give him whiplash a bit, especially when she immediately started smiling again.

“Don’t just stand there! Help me get the pile together. An actually soft pile, not robot parts this time. I have been waiting for this forefur!”


	29. ==> Terezi: Put ashed to ashes

When Terezi got to the other side, she found herself in complete darkness. Nepeta’s cave had been a bit dim, but this was complete, impenetrable blackness. She got off the slab and immediately bumped into something hard and cursed when it sent pain shooting up her side. She heard steps from the floor above her and held her breath. This was not a good position to be in, and the steps were coming closer. Terezi crouched down behind the obstacle and waited.

After a short while of shallow breathing, a door was opened and bright artificial light spilled into the room Terezi was in. She found that she was in a human bedroom, where shelves and cupboards lined the wall and the obstacle she had collided with was in fact a low, long cupboard that separated the room down the middle.

“Hello?” A very familiar voice called and Terezi sprang up from her hiding place. “Rose!” She exclaimed before the dizziness of getting up to fast gripped her and she had to hold on to the table-cupboard thing for support.

“Terezi…” Rose asked cautiously, slowly coming closer, “are you alright?”

Terezi just grumbled. “I swear, if I get asked that one more time I’m going lose my shit…” The dizziness was subsiding somewhat and at last she got a good look at Rose. She looked much the same as she always did, Terezi though, a little paler maybe, and she had stopped wearing the godtier pajamas. “But yeah, I’m fine,” she continued in the face of Rose’s concerned expression, “I’m healing.”

“Alright then,” Rose said, “come on, let me take you upstairs. It will be more comfortable than here in this dismal block. Uh, room I mean.”

Terezi laughed while Rose chuckled and said, “see, I spend just a minute with a troll, and there goes the human vocabulary straight out the window.” She started leading the way out of the room and up the stairs. Terezi remembered the layout quite well, but it seemed a bit different now. 

“I’m sure Kanaya approves,” she teased but Rose’s smile fell, “Oh no, not another sore subject? God I’m just surrounded by those lately.”

Rose sighed. “Yes, welcome to sore subject town. We all have them now, it seems. Don’t worry about it.”

“Ok, I won’t then. How come? Kanaya was seriously hyped to see you again, you know.”

“Well, yes. I suppose so. I don’t exactly know.”

“But why wouldn’t she be? She is more cherry red flushed for you than Karkat’s cherry red blood.”

“Ah, I don’t know about that… Anyway, it’s a lot more complicated. She and I… well let’s just say she belongs on the long list of people I have a lot of making up to do for.”

They reached Rose’s room and she opened it. It was full of very neat paper stacks everywhere, but there was a chair and a sleeping platform free at least. Rose gestured about. “Please, sit down,” she said and then sat on the chair herself. Terezi took the bed and crossed her legs. Rose took a deep breath.

“Aaand speaking of which,” she began, “sore topics and wronged people alike, I am very sorry for failing you.”

Terezi started in surprise. “What, you too? Is this going to be a new trend now or what?”

Rose just blinked in confusion and Terezi explained. “Karkat thinks he failed me too. You know, for not controlling Gamzee and ‘letting’ me get hurt. I really hope you aren’t going on in the same vain.”

“Ah, and if I was?”

“I would tell you what I told him. That I am responsible for my own actions, and Gamzee is responsible for his and there is no point in assigning blame elsewhere.”

“Hm,” Rose said, “well I was almost going to get on that bandwagon, but not quite. Also I don’t think it is quite that simple.”

Terezi groaned. “Oh no… You are not going to argue that with me, are you? Karkat had the good sense to just take it.”

“No, I don’t want to argue. I just want to explain myself, I suppose. This is not just about Gamzee, but about the whole wretched meteor ride. I feel like there was so much I needed to do in that time. I was aware of what the two of you were doing, and I thought I should intervene, but I didn’t.”

“You were ashen for us? Seriously?”

Rose looked down at her hands, avoided Terezi’s eyes. “Not seriously enough,” she said, ”not enough to get my head out of the bottle and actually do something about it. Not seriously enough to prevent what happened. Do you see now why I failed you?”

“That actually… yeah, that changes a few things. Don’t get me wrong, you still are not responsible for his actions, or mine, but… why didn’t you say anything?”

“I didn’t know how. Really, the whole concept was just so alien to me at the time… And Kanaya tried to explain it to me, to teach me, but I just, well, I just found it easier in the end to keep drinking, and worry about it when I was sober. Which turned out to be conveniently never.”

Rose fell silent and Terezi stared. This was unexpected, to say the least. “But this soporific you were consuming… It is addictive for humans, yes?”

“Yes, highly so as it turns out.”

“Yeah, that figures. I sure can’t blame you on that front, can I? You remember that thing you told me on your planet? About a group that addicted people go to to talk about it and shit?”

“Yes, I remember.”

“Maybe we can still do that? This thing got a lot of us, in the end.”

Rose leaned back and stretched her legs a bit. “It really did. Would you want such a group though? It would include a lot of people.”

“Yeah, I know. It would also include him, wouldn’t it.”

“Yeah, I guess it would.”

Terezi looked away. “I don’t know if I can do it then, I’m sorry.”

“No, we don’t have to. It was probably a silly idea anyway. Just like the other idea I had.”

“What, about the auspisticism? Rose, I don’t think that’s silly.”

“Yeah, well, we never got the chance to find out. That is, unless…” Rose looked up suddenly, uncertainty and hope warring on her face, “are you saying… would you still want to?”

“What, now? Rose, Gamzee and I aren’t pitch anymore. That got completely shot when I tried to kill him.”

“Well, I think you had good reason to be angry. Terezi, what he did to you was horrific!”

Terezi drew her legs up and wrapped her arms around them. After all that misery on the meteor, after everything he had said and done there, what stood out most painfully still was the fight on the bridge, and not just because the wounds from that were still physically smarting. After a long silence she finally found her words again, and even though her voice had lost any and all steadiness it all came out in a rush.

“I didn’t even realise, you know, that he could be hurt? I just rushed him for revenge, I couldn’t even think about what I was trying to do. He seemed so above it all… I still dream about that, trying to hurt him, but all he does is laugh. All he ever did was laugh when I hurt him. And I know he’s hurt, somehow, but I am so ineffectual against him, it’s crushing me…”

Rose made a very small, unhappy noise and then got up from her chair to sit beside Terezi on the bed, almost close enough to touch, but not quite. She didn’t say anything, but just looked at her, listening.

“But I still feel bad about his pain, I guess? Does that even make sense?”

“That makes perfect sense,” Rose said quietly. Terezi hid her face in her arms and spoke on. “I can’t stop hearing him everywhere. I just want him gone.”

“You keep hearing him?” Rose’s voice had gone very gentle.

“Yes, all the time. It’s like, if it’s ever quiet, or if I stop distracting myself, he’s always there. Laughing at me while I stab him, again and again, and he won’t stop laughing.” She could feel a sob and a growl shake her chest at the same time, but she couldn’t stop. She was shaking to badly to speak.

Rose slid a little closer until their sides were touching. She felt very warm and solid and Terezi couldn’t help but lean in and feel the vibrations of her voice through her chest. “He won’t go away if you ignore him,” Rose said, “you built him up in your head and he can’t leave you until you let go of that image of him.”

“I don’t know how to do that.”

“Well, let’s see. You know he is not actually invincible, yes? The reason you couldn’t kill him on LOFAF was because another power was keeping him alive.”

Terezi turned her head into Rose’s shoulder. “Yes, I know. Damn, of course I know that. A little of my image of him, as you say, is that damned juju. It still has his face though.”

“Ok.” Rose said, very carefully, “Terezi, you know that there is a way to lose that image, yes? We know the juju is no longer here, and neither is Aranea. If he is himself again, and you were to meet him and could see him for himself, for the flesh and blood he is, you might let go of this supernatural projection you have of him.”

Terezi felt like she would shake apart from the cold that ran through her heart at that. “I don’t know if I can do that,” she whispered. 

“I don’t either, ok? But will you let me find out? If it’s ok, I would like to talk to him, find out who he is now, and then we’ll just go from there?”

Terezi looked up at her in surprise to find her face very close, radiating concern and comfort. “Rose… Are you coming on to me?”

Rose smiled a little. “I suppose I am, yes.”

Terezi found that hearing that settled something within her, something that had been roiling like wild water before and was just bubbling now, just below the surface. “Oh, Ok, yeah,” she said, to her own surprise.

Rose carefully and very slowly put her arm around Terezi’s shoulder, not squeezing, but just resting it there, very gently. “We won’t do anything you don’t want to do, I promise. And I can’t even promise that this will work I’m afraid. But I find I very much want to try.”

Terezi sighed and let herself lean further into Rose. The idea of seeing him again felt a lot like facing death, but with her there, maybe she could do it.

“Ok, Rose,” she said.

If anything of the old Gamzee had survived, they just might have an auspistice.


	30. ==> Kanaya: Brighten up the place

Kanaya was standing in her hive, on a ladder that was balanced rather precariously on the uneven floor, holding herself steady with one hand and trying to hook a curtain into the fixtures with the other, when there was a knock on the door. She cursed quietly and got off the ladder as carefully as she could. Then she surveyed the room, littered as it was with half finished furnishings and decorations and immediately gave it up as a lost cause. “Coming!” she called and hurried down to the door. She opened it and found Rose standing on the porch, wearing just a skirt and a t-shirt and looking nervous and shaky.

Kanaya stared in surprise. “I didn’t know you were coming, my hive is a mess… Why didn’t you message me?”

“I’m sorry about that Kanaya,” Rose said, “I just needed to see you. I knew that if I messaged you I would just procrastinating this again like last time, and well… You really deserve to hear my apology in person.”

“Well, I suppose that makes some sense. Please come in, don’t mind the mess. I was just redecorating,” Kanaya said and opened the door wider.

She led the way inside and nervously tried to bring some order into the chaos before she noticed that Rose was still just standing in the middle of the room, looking a bit lost.

“So…” Kanaya started, “how are things on earth?”

“Oh, they are looking up I’d say. I left Terezi with Dave, and Roxy went to visit Jane. They are all settling in quite well, with a only a few hiccups here and there.”

“Good…” Kanaya said and then stopped again. 

“Damn, this is awkward, isn’t it?” Rose asked.

“Yes, it seems so. Sorry about that. Uh… would you like to sit?” Kanaya removed most of the lose curtains from the hammock and Rose sat down on the edge of it, swinging slightly and swaying her feet off the ground, before getting up again. Rose didn’t move.

“No, you know what, I think I need to do this standing up. Please, would you sit down?”

Kanaya obliged, taking her place in the hammock. 

Rose took a deep breath, and then another one, before going on. “Alright, Kanaya, I want to apologize. But before I do that, I also have a confession, and since I believe it is likely to go over worse than my apology, I would like to start with that.”

“Oh?” Kanaya asked, somewhat lost, “Yes, of course.” She folded her hands on her lap and waited.

“Ok, you should know that I have resumed my efforts to be the auspistice of Terezi and Gamzee.” 

Kanaya’s mouth dropped. She had not known what to expect, but that had definitely not been on the list. 

Rose continued in a rush. “Terezi is severely hurt, in more ways than one, and we believe so is he. They are no longer involved, of course, and I have not spoke to him yet. But I want to find out about his state of mind now. I think if I can get them to see each other for who they really are, it would go a long way toward their healing. Their friendship might not be salvageable, I don’t know, and I don’t even know if I can get Gamzee to agree, or if I can even be the right person for them here, but… It is something I have resolved to try.”

Rose looked a lot more unsure than she was trying to convey, standing deliberately straight, as if braced. Kanaya frowned to herself. This was a day of surprises, apparently. “I can’t say I saw that coming,” she said at last, “but it sounds like you don’t need my instructions anymore. I don’t know if anything of my lessons actually stuck, but it seems to me that you understand the involved concepts quite well as it is.”

Rose took another deep breath. “Which brings me seamlessly to the topic of apologizing. I am sorry for so many things, Kanaya, and I am sorry to you more than anyone.” Rose blinked and started to turn away, but stopped herself with visible effort. “Really, the fact that your lessons were only a waste of time is just the tip of the iceberg. My failure to meet my responsibilities in that time staggering, and I…” Rose looked down at her hands, twisting them together, “This really just is a fancy way of saying: I failed you when you needed me and I made a burden and a nuisance of myself when you were struggling, and I am so very sorry.”

Rose very slowly closed her eyes, held her hands clasped and waited.

“Rose.” Kanaya got up and stepped up to her and waited until Rose opened her eyes again to look at her through the film of strange, clear tears, before she continued. “I will not pretend that your actions and behavior on the meteor were not hurtful. I believe that claiming so would go against the spirit of honesty we currently have here. But still I understand that at the time, you were very much losing control over a habit that ended up controlling you. A feeling that is not foreign to me. Which I suppose is my fancy way of saying that I forgive you, and that I am sorry for not recognizing what it was you were doing. In hindsight, it was really obvious. You weren’t the only person refusing to see things back then.”

Rose leaned forward a bit, unsure, but Kanaya did not hesitate to throw her arms around her and hug her tight. 

“If I say it now, will you hear it?” Rose said, raspy and muffled against her chest. Kanaya closed her eyes too and kissed the top of Rose’s head, “Yes.” Rose didn’t respond and Kanaya tried to say it again, but the word didn’t want to move past the blockage in her throat. Rose’s shoulders started shaking.

“I love you,” she said and sobbed.

“I love you too, Rose,” Kanaya said, words cracking in her voice, but clear nonetheless.

Rose didn’t stop crying, but just held on tight, and Kanaya let her own tears slip past her closed eyelids and returned the grip with the same strength.

 

After a long time, Kanaya found her voice again. “Do you want to sit down?”

Rose nodded against her and drew back a little. She then let Kanaya lead her to the hammock, where they both sat down, arms still around one another. Finally, Rose drew back again, far enough to look at her. The tears had stopped, but she still looked worried. Kanaya nodded a bit in encouragement until finally Rose spoke up again.

“I still need to ask… you aren’t mad at me for Terezi and Gamzee?”

“No, I am not. Why should I be?”

“Because the way I understand it, this means I could become romantically involved with someone you very much hate. Someone you killed, in fact.”

“Ah, yes. You see, trolls do actually have conventions for this eventuality.”

“You do? Well, of course you do. I can imagine this happens quite a lot.”

Kanaya smiled a bit. “Indeed. Well, allowing for the fact that the killing was just attempted, but anyway. You are not answerable to me for your other quadrants, Rose, and I am beholden not to harm them. However, I am very much within my rights to hold them answerable to me, seeing as you do not have a moirail.”

“What does that mean?”

“Usually a troll’s moirail has the privilege of protecting their palemate from threats posed by other romantic entanglements. In the absence of a moirail that role falls to whoever can assert themselves as the most dangerous. In this case, me.”

Rose raised an eyebrow. “And in practical terms this means…?”

“If they hurt you, I will kill them.”

Rose pinched the bridge of her nose. “Wow, you know, in human society it is also customary to say that? It is however less customary to actually mean it.”

“Well, I suppose we will have to file that under cultural differences for now then, won’t we?”

Rose laughed in clear relief. “Alright. You realize though, that in retaliation I now have to drag you through all all the trappings that come with human romance, right?”

“Oh, and what would those be?” Kanaya asked with a grin and in mock worry.

“Oh, you have no idea! You will need to meet my parents for one, over dinner. Traditionally seen as the most awkward social situation any living organism has ever come up with. There are established rituals revolving around making us both as uncomfortable and embarrassed as physically possible.”

“I think I can manage that. I doubt it comes close to fighting your quadrant’s lusus when first visiting their hive.”

Instead of answering, Rose just looked at her, a slow smile growing until it lit up her entire face like sunlight. 

 

 


	31. ==> Jade: dream a little dream

When Jade finally got to bed, it was already very late. Jake had fallen asleep on the couch over an hour ago, still clutching his phone that he had been typing on all afternoon as she sorted components of what was left of her gadgets. There wasn’t all that much really useful stuff, but nonetheless there would be a few neat things she could make with this, even if it was just metal scrap for the most part. She would need to get into some serious acquisition, but that was a project for another day. Only when she crawled under the blankets did she really notice how tired she was and it didn’t take her more than a few breaths before she was fast asleep.

She drifted aimlessly in dreams for a while, but after some time the shapes and colors she saw coalesced into something she recognized. She was suspended in space, flying high above the sun, and she could see the gravitational fields of the planets and their moons, and the planets themselves as tiny, brightly lit specs in the eddies and swirls they were carrying along. The twin orbit of home kept tearing into the other planets fields and made them shudder like ripples in a pool, and the ripples lapped up against the intruding bodies, shaking them from side to side like paper boats. But as she watched, it seemed to her that the ripples were building up a rhythm. The planets passed, and every time they did they were disturbed a little less, settling in to the new system and Jade realized that she was not alone.

“It’s stabilizing,” she said aloud into the silence.

“Indeed it is!” a voice said from behind her. It was young and musical, full of joy and so very familiar. She turned around and saw a troll. Or at least, it could have been a troll, if the horns weren’t attached to a headband and the gray wasn’t just patchily painted on.

“Calliope!” Jade exclaimed rushed forward to hug her. Calliope giggled and returned the hug.

“It’s good to see you again, Jade! I’m so glad you found your way here.”

“I’m glad too! But where is here? Isn’t this a dream? Are you dead?”

Calliope laughed. “No, I’m not dead. It’s just that for me, being alive means something slightly different than for you. You are in fact dreaming, but that doesn’t mean that I am not really here. It just took you a while to find me. I’ll have you know that Roxy beat you to it, though not by much.”

“Well, I’d hardly expect to beat a hero of void in finding hidden stuff.”

“Hihi, no, you wouldn’t. But don’t put yourself down, space is and remains the best there is.”

“I will just have to take your word for that then.” Jade grinned. “But are the orbits really stabilizing? They are moving so fast now, something like this would take forever.”

“It is a work in progress, I’d say. But yes, they are stabilizing.”

“A work in progress… yours, I take it?”

“Oh, no! No, this is not my work. I don’t have to do anything here, I just watch the outcomes now.”

“But the initial state is your doing?”

“Hm, in a way. But wait a second, why don’t we sit down?”

Suddenly the scene changed, and Jade found herself standing on solid ground again. They were sitting on a park bench by the side of a path, the sun was shining bright and warm on green grass studded with flowers of many colours and trees with full, green canopies and Jade heard birds singing. She looked around in surprise and delight.

“Welcome to my garden,” Calliope said, “this is nicer to talk, I think.”

“Callie, this is beautiful!”

Calliope lowered her head shyly. “You think so? Thank you! I’m still working on it, but I always like being here. I modeled the plants after those I saw on earth. I hope they feel a little like home?”

“Indeed they do.” Jade did not mention that some of the flowers’ colors did not appear in nature and also that the bark of trees was seldom purple. It was perfect just the way it was.

“Speaking of making,” Jade started again, “did you make this solar system? Or universe? What am I even looking at here?”

“Ah, this is somewhat complicated. You could say I made it, because I created the conditions necessary for it to come into being. You could also say that you made it, because it was your will that shaped it. So you did a very fine job of it, if I do say so myself.” Calliope laughed out loud at her own joke and Jade couldn’t help but join in.

“So it wasn’t the game then?”

“No, it wasn’t. The game does not account for the unique set of circumstances of what happened to us.”

“Then what actually happened? We are all very fuzzy on the details there. Did we win? Most of us just recall losing in some way or another. In fact I remember things that contradict each other. I remember John and Davesprite dying on the golden ship, but also they didn’t…? It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Ah, yes, that is to be expected. You did win, but not in any way the game conceived of. As did I. We also all lost catastrophically. But that’s the nature of splitting timelines, as far as I understand them. Let me see if I can get together the events as linearly as possible.”

Calliope thought for a while and Jade leaned back on the bench, waiting patiently.

“Ok,” Calliope continued, “think of it like this: Of all possible timelines, we are actually an amalgamation of several. Several millions, but that doesn’t matter. Our experience of losing the game, and mostly dying, was one failure state, while other strings led to more favorable outcomes. One of these was my predominating over Caliborn and my ascension to my current state. One of these lines was you winning the game, defeating the ascended version of him and creating a new reality. At one of the intersections, my current individual iteration opened the door in the timeline that ended up sacrificed for the ultimate victory, letting through those that perished, or likewise sacrificed themselves in one way or another. The reality you see before you is the one you created. The worlds you now live on are in the universe that houses those of you that perished in what I call the martyr timeline.”

Jade sat in silence for a while with her head spinning.

“This… really is complicated,” she said and Calliope laughed, “but, this means we are not the alpha timeline?”

“The concept of alpha and doomed timelines is an oversimplification. You are not doomed, if that is what you are asking. The iterations you have memories of was a sequence of events that was erased and superseded.”

“Like a scratch?”

“More like an overwritten game state. A state that was never saved before a new session was loaded. On a much larger scale though.”

“So we failed.”

“No. The timeline you remember did not lose and was not doomed. I say it was sacrificed, because by resetting your own iteration of events you allowed another set to triumph. And before the reset occurred I opened the door and you came through, from the field of battle and the dreambubbles alike, escaping to this place, your ultimate reward. Not given to you by the game, but by your own victory, with just a little bit of help by me.”

“Do you know what happened to the other set then?”

“No. From our vantage point, the specifics are unknowable. I only know that we won, because this place could not exist otherwise.”

“But why did you save these iterations of us then? If others of us are still alive and well elsewhere?”

“Simple! Because you are the iterations of you that this iteration of me talked to, and grew fond of. Because you are my friends, Jade.”

Jade threw her arms around Calliope and hugged her. “Thank you,” she said while Calliope stuttered a bit while returning the hug. When Jade drew back, she was grinning.

“This is the bottom line, though. You won, you live and now we have peace. You earned it.”

“Yeah, I suppose we really did. Though there are still things I would like to know?”

“Like what?”

“There are so many things here that don’t add up. We literally made a list of impossible things. Like the unstable orbits, even though they seem to be sorting that out by themselves now.”

“Hehe, no, they aren’t”

“What?”

“They aren’t sorting themselves out, you are sorting them out. They do what you want them to do, wether you realise it or not. All I do is supply potential. The forming of that potential is entirely up to you.”

“So the orbits are stabilizing because we are stabilizing?”

“Basically.”

“And all the strange things… they are there because we want them to be?”

“Yes.”

“Wow… But many of those things are impossible!”

Calliope laughed loud and long. “Clearly they are not. At least, they are not to you. Take your time to wrap your head around this, but in your current state, there is very little that you can not do. You will learn to appreciate the scale of your power in time, I think.”

“Huh, well, I guess if you say so. You are the most powerful of us, after all.”

“Hehe, yes! But not by as much as you might think. We are both god tier heroes of space. The differences are not that great. But my class is the most passive of them all, so most of what I do is enable others to do things. Like the things you can do now. So I suppose it’s hard to say. But the world is shaped by your wills, and what is is that way because you want, or would want it like that.”

“So what about those of us who never went god tier? Like the trolls. What can they do?”

“That depends. What do they want?”

Jade grinned. “Ah, so it counts for them too.”

“Yes. God tier or no, they are also victors. They can learn to use their powers, they can ascend if they wish, they can be immortal if they want to. Don’t worry about them. Or him.” Calliope winked and Jade spluttered a bit.

“I don’t know what you are talking about!”

Calliope winked again and Jade groaned. “Ok, let’s change the subject why don’t we. Let’s talk about you.”

“That is a very obvious tactic Jade, and I’ll let you know I’m not falling for it. But what about me?

“Well, you are out here all alone. Do you want to come live with us? You know you are welcome, right?”

“Ah, thank you Jade, that is very kind! But I do live with you. Well, not physically, but I find bodies overrated. I am quite happy where I am, and I can talk to you whenever I want! Think of this place as my home, and you too are welcome to visit me whenever you want. But I am far from alone.”

“Rose told me that there is a religious tradition devoted to you, and that you speak to ‘prophets’ in dreams? That wouldn’t have anything to do with that?” Jade winked.

“Ah, yes. That is probably a bit unfortunate. It’s just that you took some time getting here and I was bored, so I talked to some of them sometimes. And sometimes I got impressionable ones. But I never had the heart to stop them, they tell me the most lovely stories!”

“Rose mentioned that they do that, yes. I don’t think it’s a bad thing though! From what I gather they are quite happy to talk to you. And it’s not a major religion or anything, so I guess it’s fine.”

“I’m glad! I try not to interfere to much. These cultures are fascinating to watch and I’d hate to bring them off their own paths.”

“Most of them are really weird and confusing though.”

“They are that, too. But I think you need to go now, someone is trying to talk to you.”

“Aww, really? I would love to stay with you some more Callie.”

“I would too! But you’ll be back, I’m sure. There is much I want to ask you about the growing of plants. Mine always seem to change color a lot…”

“I’ll try to help you,” Jade promised and smiled as the image of Calliope and the colorful park slowly faded from view as she resurfaced from the dream.


	32. ==> Jade: Wake Up!

Jade woke up slowly, taking her time with drifting back into waking one step after the other, smiling all the way. When she opened her eyes the sun was already standing through and shining through the window onto her bed. She looked at it for a while and watched the dust motes dance. She certainly had a lot to think about, but before she could really get down to that or start to wrap her mind around all the implications of what she had learned a blinking light caught her eye, coming from her computer.

She yawned and peeled herself out of bed, careful to not wake Jake who was still snoring softly with his face on his phone, and shuffled over to her keyboard.

\-- carcinoGeneticist [CG] started pestering gardenGnostic [GG] \-- 

CG: JADE?  
CG: …  
CG: JADE HARLEY ARE YOU THERE?  
CG: APPARENTLY NOT.  
CG: THAT’S OK THIS ISN’T ANYTHING CRITICAL.  
CG: I JUST WANTED TO…  
CG: NEVER MIND, IT REALLY IS THAT FAR FROM CRITICAL AT THIS STAGE.  
GG: hi karkat!  
GG: sorry about that but i was asleep  
GG: you will not believe the dream i had!  
CG: WHAT WAS YOUR DREAM?  
GG: i met calliope!  
CG: WHAT, THE CHERUB? DID YOU GO TO A DREAMBUBBLE OR SOMETHING?  
GG: no not really. shes here she just talks to people in dreams  
GG: i think shes sort of incorporeal now  
CG: OH, OK. THAT’S HARDLY CREEPY AT ALL THEN.  
CG: BUT DOES SHE KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON HERE?  
GG: as a matter of fact she does!  
GG: i learned a lot from her  
CG: LET ME GUESS: IT HAS TO DO WITH A SHITTON OF TEMPORAL AND SPACEY SHENANIGANS?  
GG: you are correct!  
GG: :)  
GG: but the short version is that we are those who died in a timeline that was sacrificed to win the game  
GG: that we won, but dont remember winning because we were other iterations  
GG: something like that  
CG: WE ARE A DOOMED FUCKING TIMELINE!?  
GG: no!   
GG: ok, lets go with the even shorter version for now  
GG: we won and this world is our reward  
CG: SEE, THAT WASN’T SO COMPLICATED.  
CG: YOU CAN EXPLAIN ALL THAT TO ME SOME TIME LATER.  
CG: SOME TIME I CARE ABOUT ANYTHING OTHER THAN NOT BEING DOOMED.  
GG: we are not doomed, silly! we won!  
GG: this is good news, everything is fine  
CG: WOW, OK, I’LL BELIEVE THAT WHEN WE DON’T ALL DIE HORRIBLY.  
CG: AGAIN.  
GG: well dont die horribly then  
GG: in fact i think that should be really easy to avoid now  
GG: if i understood her right you dying actually cant even happen!  
CG: WHAT? HOW COME?  
GG: it seems that this world is whatever we want it to be  
GG: and anything we dont want to happen wont happen!  
CG: HUH… SEE IF NO ONE WANTS ME TO DIE HORRIBLY THEN.  
GG: karkat!!!  
GG: that is a horrible thing to say!  
GG: no one wants you to die stupid  
GG: in fact so many people want you to not die that its not going to happen, not ever!  
CG: I CAN THINK OF SOMEONE WHO DOES THOUGH.  
GG: What!? Who?  
CG: GAMZEE…  
GG: oh no, karkat…  
GG: :(  
GG: im sure he doesnt want that  
CG: WELL HIM KILLING ME IS GENERALLY SEEN AS A HOT FUCKING HINT TO HIS INTENTIONS IN THAT REGARD.  
CG: I DON’T KNOW IF THIS IS DIFFERENT ON HUMAN WORLD BUT TROLLS DON’T KILL PEOPLE THEY DON’T WANT DEAD.  
GG: Karkat…  
GG: :(  
GG: im so sorry  
CG: YEAH, WHATEVER.  
CG: I DON’T GIVE A FUCK.  
CG: AND ANYONE SAYING OTHERWISE CAN JUST GET OFF MY BULGE ABOUT IT!  
GG: and who would that be?  
CG: FEFERI FOR ONE, AND TEREZI TOO OF ALL PEOPLE.  
CG: THEY KEEP INSISTING I SHOULD TALK TO HIM.  
GG: maybe they have a point?  
GG: a lot of things have changed  
CG: YEAH, ABOUT THAT…  
CG: YOU SAID THINGS ARE THE WAY WE WANT THEM TO BE NOW?  
GG: yes  
CG: THAT DOESN’T EXPLAIN EVERYTHING THOUGH…  
GG: what doesnt it explain?  
CG: I TOLD YOU HOW I HAD TO REBUILD MY HIVE, YES?  
CG: AND HOW IT’S BASICALLY IDIOTICALLY HUGE NOW?  
CG: WHY IS THAT? I NEVER THOUGHT TO MYSELF:  
CG: GEE, I WONDER WHAT MY LIFE WOULD BE LIKE IF I OWNED A BUNCH OF USELESS EXPENSIVE SHIT.  
GG: you didnt?  
GG: well then maybe someone else wished that for you  
GG: i think it all boils down to who wanted what, and why  
GG: i also dont know why anyone would want my gadgets gone  
CG: WELL MAYBE SOMEONE WANTED A NORMAL LIFE FOR YOU?  
CG: YOU KNOW, WITHOUT IMPOSSIBLE SHIT AROUND YOU EVERYWHERE YOU GO?  
CG: OR MAYBE SOMEONE WANTED THAT FOR ALL OF US.  
GG: maybe youre right  
GG: that makes sense i think  
GG: Though im getting ahead in rebuilding them  
GG: theres not much that can stop me now  
GG: :D  
CG: HARLEY THERE WAS NEVER MUCH THAT COULD STOP YOU.  
CG: …  
CG: FUCK THAT SOUNDED CHEESY.  
GG: it did a bit :)  
CG: SO, UH…  
CG: THIS WHOLE ‘MAKE A WISH THING’  
CG: DOES THIS GO FOR US TOO?  
GG: for you trolls? yes it does  
GG: you are victors too, karkat. you won the same way we did in the end  
GG: so of course it goes for you too  
CG: OH, OK.  
CG: SO IF I MADE A WISH ABOUT YOU BEING HERE…  
GG: karkat vantas, was that actually a pickup line??  
GG: :D  
GG: karkat?  
GG: …  
GG: are you still there?  
CG: NO, I’M NOT HERE ANYMORE.  
CG: I JUST DIED OF EMBARRASSMENT BECAUSE PAST ME THOUGHT IT WAS IN ANY WAY A GOOD IDEA TO TYPE THAT.  
CG: THAT’S IT, I’M OUT!  
GG: hahaha, youre silly!!  
GG: dont die just yet or ill have no one to meet when i visit you!  
GG: YOU’LL COME?  
GG: of course ill come!   
GG: now that the transportalisers are working i can visit you any time  
GG: and of course i want to visit you, in case youre going to ask!  
GG: and you have to show me your planet and your home!  
GG: i heard it turned out to be quite the place  
CG: WELL, YEAH.  
GG: and then we can visit the others together  
GG: itll be a lot of fun, youll see  
CG: YEAH, WE COULD DO THAT.   
GG: and then well go see gamzee  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK!?  
CG: NO!  
CG: WHAT?  
CG: WHY WOULD YOU EVEN SUGGEST THAT JESUS CHRIST!  
GG: because, karkat, he is obviously still very important to you  
GG: even though he did terrible things  
GG: because people dont stop being important when they hurt us  
GG: and sometimes we need to understand why they did what they did   
GG: and sometimes that leads to us forgiving them  
GG: but even if it doesnt its still something you need to know  
GG: i know that better than most, karkat!  
GG: or did you forget that i had you killed too?  
CG: NO…  
CG: BUT YOU WERE EVIL YOU THEN.  
CG: THAT WASN’T YOU!  
CG: ALSO I CAME BACK.  
GG: and so you did now  
GG: and tell me: does killing you sound like gamzee?  
GG: from all u have heard of him it does not  
GG: and so much of what ive heard does not add up at all  
GG: we are going to find out what happened to him and you will be there  
CG: JADE…   
GG: what?  
CG: PLEASE DON’T FLIP FUCKING ASHEN ON ME.  
GG: hahaha, oh karkat!  
GG: im human, i dont do quadrants, remember?  
GG: and the way i see it we make the rules now  
GG: so, no clubs ok?  
CG: DAMNIT, OK.  
CG: BUT JADE?  
GG: yeah?  
CG: I’M REALLY FUCKING TERRIFIED OF HIM…  
GG: i know karkat. its going to be ok, youll see  
CG: ALSO I REALLY WANT YOU TO BE RIGHT.  
CG: IF HE REALLY IS HIMSELF AGAIN…   
CG: FUCK.  
GG: well then there you go!  
GG: what did i just explain about the things you really want?  
CG: YEAH…  
CG: FUCK  
CG: …  
GG: ok, thats it, im coming over  
GG: just give me a second.  


\-- gardenGnostic [GG] stopped pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG] -- 

Jade jumped up from the computer and dressed in a hurry, stuffing clothes into a bag and just hoping that she got a full set or two. Then she waved to her room and to Jake, who was still asleep, and hurried out of her room and onto the transportaliser. 

After the flash she found herself standing on a wide meadow in front of a large, dark house. It had weird angles everywhere and looked like it had been constructed out of many separate building blocks, but only a few windows at the very top where illuminated. Cautiously she stepped up to the door and knocked as hard as she could. There was a long stretch of silence, but at last she heard footsteps and muffled cursing from within as well as a few bumps and crashes and she smiled to herself. Then the door was torn open in a hurry and there he stood.

He was still a little shorter than her and was wearing the familiar baggy trousers and shirt with his sign on it. His hair was messy and sticking up to all sides and there were translucent red tracks down his gray cheeks and his strange yellow eyes were also red with tears. As soon as he saw her he shot forward, wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her chest with a sob. She returned the hug as hard as she could, with one arm around his shoulders and the other around his head. She could feel his small, compact form shaking against her as she took in the warmth and rough texture of his skin, his scent like musky rock dust and slate, but most of all the fact that after and despite all that had happened to them both, she had him in her arms right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that, dear friends and readers, is that.  
> There is a lot more that could happen in this story, but everyone is more or less settled or pointed in the right direction and this is the point where I will close the curtains for now. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who came along for the ride on this, and especially to those leaving some feedback!  
> I had a lot of fun writing this, and you made it all the more rewarding.


End file.
